Losing the band was the single most devestating thing that's ever happened to me, somewhat melodramatic but true. Maybe my armour was too thin but the event shook my self confidence for a long time.. It certainly wrong footed me and set me on a singularly sef-destructive path for the best part of a year. I couldn't get my head around it, I felt completely betrayed. They had asked me to be singer, even got me to sack Richard our first singer and then they turned on me. I felt used. Although I now acknowledge that my fellow bandmates couldn't have handled the matter any other way, the scars still run deep. The Smurf was quietly put out to pasture in March 2002 and his two basses and his bass rig were put into storage. I decided to turn my back on playing music unable to face the thought of getting involved in another band.
The band itself was badly damaged by the loss of its bass player, but almost exactly a year later they had arisen phoenix like in the form of the excellent, and rather successful, Funk metal band Soulcry.
It was six months before I found myself with a guitar in my hands again. This time it was purely to please myself. Looking at classical Tabs on the internet I downloaded a few corny old favourites, bought a cheap classical guitar and tried halfheartedly to learn something vaguely musical. Sadly, I found it very difficult to summon up the required enthusiasm and the guitar remained in his house collecting dust while I picked up the pieces of a failed marriage and his bruised ego.
At this point, Pepe Jaleo entered my life, the character I take on when in full flow always requires a name. I had moved to Milton Keynes in Buckinghamshire, England. It was here that I found myself with time on my hands once more. The cheap classical travelled up with me and I began to become increasingly interested in the style of music that had captivated my 12 year old mind so many years before. I got hold of one solitary tape by Paco De Lucia that completely blew me away. Whilst intellectually I couldn't grasp how Flamenco was structured I knew emotionally that this was the music I was born to play, it seemed to speak to me in ways that nothing else ever had.
As I was rusty at the guitar and as the style of playing was so alien to me I made very slow progress. But my determination led me to practice solidly for two or more hours a night. Finally the dedication began to pay off, with every week came a new Palo (song) and new Falsettas (basically melodies). My understanding and recognition of many of the key forms of Flamenco opened up my ears to help me decipher the incredibly complicated guitar techniques of hero's like Juan Martin, Paco Pena, Sabicas, Pepe Habichuela, and Nino Ricardo.
In October I sold the Smurf's Trace Elliot amps on Ebay which gave me just about enough money to purchase a beautiful brand new Amalio Burguet 3F Flamenco. The improvement in tone and attack was immediately noticable, so much so that I can't rate these guitars highly enough.
Ultimately Pepe Jaleo dreams of playing in front of an audience again, I won't be able to stop him. I know he will, and he'll take me with him, and soon. I've seen the determination in his eyes when i look in the mirror and, I've sensed the fire in his belly, it's something he and I were born to do. Can a man reinvent himself over and over and still succeed?
Only Pepe Jaleo can make it happen.
Nick Sherreard |
