He awoke, threw back the curtains, and greeted the new October morn. "Hello, New October Morn� said he. (He being, perhaps, noted for his silliness.)

�Hello back� said the New October Morn.

�What are you waiting for? A new morn is here. You can do anything that you want with it.� He was rather taken aback. He was not accustomed to inanimate objects returning his greeting. Well, actually, the new October morn was rather animated. But he was sure that it qualified as �an inanimate object.� (There had been that bowl of petunias. He had never actually greeted it. Though it had said �Oh, no. Not again,� as it whizzed by. He distinctly remembered: �Oh, no. Not again.� said the bowl of petunias.)

�New October Morn� said he (never one to let falter his side of the conversation, even if it were with an inanimate object), �what shall I do? For my life is a shambles. My hopes and aspirations have failed me.�

�For one thing� said the New October Morn, �you�d better get your ass in gear, and get to work. You spend far too much time conversing with inanimate objects. On the other hand� continued the New October Morn� (he wondered at this point whether New October Morn�s had one hand, much less an other hand) (�Will you stop interrupting me? It�s irrelevant.� Interjected the New October Morn.)

�For one thing�, repeated the New October Morn (with perhaps too much of a tinge of annoyance). (�Darn! Now the editor is interrupting me! How shall I ever finish?� groaned the New October Morn.)

�For one thing� repeated the New October Morn, for the third time, �tomorrow will also be a new October morn. You get thirty of them, or so.� (The New October Morn was not going to quibble as to whether October 1 qualified as a �new� October morn, or just �an� October morn.) �Each morn is a new morn. A fresh start. Some of us think that October morns are better than, say, February morns. But that�s an entirely different subject.� (October was noted for its self-pride.)

�But, New October Morn� he continued, �I mourn for the lost Lenore. She loved me, but left me for a bottle of hooch.�

�Keep that up� said the New October Morn, �and I�ll send a raven a-tap, tap, tapping at your window pane, exclaiming �Nevermore�. That�ll annoy the heck out of you!�

�Sorry� he said.

�Tomorrow� said the New October Morn, �will be another new morn. Make of it what you will.�

The alarm clock awakened him. He was twenty minutes late for work.

 

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