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IN MEMORY OF LOYAL WRAY (1939-2002)
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"There is no one who can take up where he left off. We enjoyed mutual ego battering and although I would never tell him, I did value his opinion. I would ask him to hold me a spot in whatever place he's in now, but he would say, "Swampetta, you'll never make it past the doorman." He listened to me when I made my many pointless points and I thought he was pretty much on course when he would put me in whatever place he thought I should be. Slong Lazerus and if you can't save me a spot there, just wave as I go by, probably in the other direction."
"Good bye my good online friend. I see that you have gone to be with your best friend now, and I hope that you light up the sky with your wit and wisdom forever. Do try to keep the arguing between you at a minimum, even though both of you enjoy it so, and take some time to make a place to welcome your mother and aunt when they are ready to join you with the same loving care you gave them while you were here with them. I'm sorry that we never met except on here, and I will think of you every day and be thankful for your inspiration. When I read the poem that Lara posted in your memorial, it made me feel blessed to know you even more, and today I will read it when my family sits down for our dinner."
"It is so BEAUTIFUL!!!! It's POWERFUL!!!!!!
I read it over and over, and tears flowed generously.
Even the dog sat here and whined, because he knew something was affecting me.
Few people or things or happenings have ever affected me this way.
Thank you, Loyal!!"
In 1971, I won my first lottery. Unfortunately, it was the US Government Draft Lottery. For those of you who never heard of this, let me explain. During the late sixties and early seventies, the government put into place a method for recruiting young men into the Armed Services. Every year they would draw numbers from 1 to 365, one for each day of the year. In the year that you turned 19, these numbers held a very special meaning. Whatever date your birthday, you'd search the lottery list for the corresponding number. If your number was between 1 and 50, you were virtually assured a place in the Armed Services. Well, my number was 40. This meant for me that I could either attempt to get a college deferment, move to Canada, or enlist in the Service of my choice before Uncle Sam came a-knocking. What I decided to do was to choose a lengthy Army school to delay any possibility of ending up in Vietnam, which was still very much an active war. The basic training and electronics school ran from Oct. 1971 through November 1972. However, Vietnam was still an issue. We were taught, maybe not directly, but certainly through association, that it was not a good idea to form any friendships. You never knew who might end up being assigned to Vietnam, and never return. I bought into this ideology wholeheartedly. If you don't make any friends, you won't be affected if they should die. Similar in thinking that if you never love, you'll never be hurt; not the best of psychological mindsets to operate under. As a result, to this day, I can only name one individual with whom I served during that training period.
What has all this got to do with today? An on line acquaintance passed away suddenly; a stroke, with no recovery. We had "connected" on line, which violated my policy of not making friends. We shared some e-mailed stories, comments, thoughts, and life choices. We laughed and smiled, not seeing each other's face, but knowing that we were connecting with a kindred spirit. As writers, we allowed each other the freedom to express, as we felt led. As men, we wrote unashamed of feelings, emotions, thoughts, desires, and fears. I don't know whether I would have recognized him, face to face. But, I feel certain that in that Great Writer's Corner in the Sky, we'll connect again. I am not sorry to have violated my "no friends" policy. I am sorry he's gone. I am touching the grief in my soul for a friend who I will miss. I will use this "connection" to spur me on when I just don't feel like sharing the talents that God has given me. I will smile as I think of his witty words, or wacky opinions. I will write because in so doing, just as he did, a little part of me will always be just a "click" away.
Loyal�you are missed. Yet, I know, in the realm of the spirit, you are only a thought away. Smile.
The day after I heard of your passing .... I took a long walk and 'short run' with my golden lab, most loyal Max (short for Maximillius) ... and saw a low circling red tailed hawk follow us to the watertower and back.
Loyal Wray ... thank you for all the inspiration, the room to think for myself, and the honest criticism, which is so rare, given with such class ... that is so desperately needed.
Thank you for being here ... thank you for showing your soul ... telling of trials and trails traveled.
I, and apparently many others, love you. ;')
See you soon, no matter how it's looked at! LOL
thewolfhouse.com
Writers' Corner: December Issue :: E-mail
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