You ever notice how men and women describe things in different ways? Men are much more uh......concise, I guess is the right word. Women, on the other hand, will tell the same story about the same set of events and you might as well sit back, let your mind wander and hope they finish before the sun rises and sets more than once.

Let's take a young man who has been flown to Paris by his company on an important business matter. As his buddies gather around during the evening of his first day back, he will relate his adventure in the following manner:

"The trip was awesome, guys. First class across the Atlantic, a gorgeous little redhead stewardess kept my glass filled and my mouth watering all the way". He grins as his buddies all nod in envy. "Paris is really a blast. I had one of the gendarmes take my picture with the Eifel tower just a mile away and in the background. Another cop took my picture with me standing in front of the Louvre. Go inside? You mean waste time with looking at pictures, you kidding?"

His buddies nod in understanding and one blurts out "The wimmin, Jerry, tell us about them French wimmin". Jerry plops down in a chair and grins from ear to ear. "You wanna know about the women do you? Ok, I'll tell you. They don't call 'em French kisses, French post cards and French ticklers for nothing. Those French women are totally hot." Jerry takes twenty minutes to describe his two 'conquests' during his ten day stay in Paris. His friends hang on every word.

Winding up his story, he merely says "The business end went great and I get to go to London next month". Ten days in Paris and it takes maybe a total of thirty minutes to tell about, empty a pitcher of beer and finish off his share of a pizza while watching the Rams win 31-7 on a TV set in the back of the bar.

Ask a woman the same question about HER trip to Paris and Whooo boy! Will you get a different answer.

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Betty's girlfriends gather around her living room on her first night back and the conversation goes something like this: "First class.......can you believe I got to fly all the way to Paris, first class?" She is interrupted by ohhhh's and ahhhh's from her friends. The questions come faster than wasps chasing after a sixteen year old outfielder dumb enough to run into their tree while trying to catch a fly ball in a neighbor's orchard.

Tessie: "You DID wear the red dress didn't you?" Mary: Did you take the black purse I bought you for your birthday?" Sue: "Remember the movie, French kiss? You see any men that looked like Kevin Kline?" Sally: "How come they flew you first class?" And so the questions flew and were answered by this animated young woman named Betty. Janet, Carol and Donna just sit quietly and wait for the story to unfold.

"Well, Kevin Kline wasn't on the plane, but there was a man across the aisle who looked a lot like Tom Sellick" Betty said. Mary: "Did he have a dimple like Tom does?" Sue: "No way! I don't believe you". Sally: "Did he have a mustache?" Carol: What was he wearing?" Janet and Donna are spooning the last of their ice cream into their mouths.

"He was wearing a blue blazer and grey pants. His shirt was a pale blue and he wasn't wearing a tie" said Betty. "The best part was.......can you believe this, he had white socks on." Sue: "No way". Betty: "Yes, way". Carol: That's so tacky". Janet: "Cut to the chase, girl. Did you two get aquainted or not?" "Yeah" chorus the rest "Tell us what else happened on the flight"

"Weel, after we got airborne and the pilot announced we could unbuckle our seat belts, he leaned over and asked me if this was my first trip to Paris" Betty began. Sue: "You didn't tell us what you were wearing. Was it the red dress?" Betty: Looking anoyed at the interruption "No, I was wearing the powder blue one. The one with spagetti straps and ruffles at the hem". Tessie: "That dress barely comes to mid thigh, Betty. No wonder he wanted to get aquainted with you." Betty: "At least I don't wear thongs to work like some people I know." Janet: "Be quiet and let Betty tell her story." Carol: "I can't believe he was wearing white socks. Ewwww!"

"So I said this was my first trip and we talked back and forth for a few minutes. Then he asked me if he could move across the aisle and sit with me for awhile. I said sure and he took the window seat next to me." Three women squeal in anticipation of what might come next. Tessie is still pouting about her best friend not having worn the red dress they had picked out together and Donna and Sally come hurrying back into the living room with fresh bowls of ice cream yelling "What did we miss? You gotta start over from the part about the white socks."

Everyone gets comfortable again, Donna and Sally are brought up to date and Betty continues her story. She has now been talking for forty minutes. "Well, we started talking about our jobs and where we were from and things like that." Carol: Did you ask him about the white socks?" Tessie: Carol, you are such a dork sometimes. Can't you forget about the flippin' socks?" Carol: Sorry, I can't concentrate if I don't know why a man who looks like Tom Sellick is wearing white socks." Donna: Shut up about the damn socks and let Betty get on with her story, fer cripes sake."

"Well, I took off my shoes and tucked my feet under me to get more comfortable for the long flight. I guess you were right about the dress being too short because he looked like he was trying to memorize every inch of my legs when I did that." Janet: Betty, you are such a slut sometimes". Tessie is shaking her head in disaproval. Donna: "Look who is talking. Like you didn't disappear into the kitchen with Gail's boyfriend, Brad for fifteen minutes at the party last week." Sally: "Will you two please shut up and let Betty tell her story?" Tessie and Donna are now glaring at one another.

"Well, we talked about ........................[fast forward twenty minutes].

"No, I didn't get to give him my phone number and no, I never saw him again after we left the plane." Here there is a chorus of "Awwww's" "The first thing I noticed about the airport was all the signs were in French; even the ones giving directions." "Well, DUH" pipes up Tessie. "You expected Spanish?" is Donna's contribution. Sue: "They didn't even have sub titles like in the French movies?"

"I took a taxi to the hotel and you won't believe the hotel. Cornises and gargoyles and even........."

Carol: Were the socks silk? I mean if they were silk or nylon............uh......that would make a difference wouldn't it? Well, wouldn't it?

And so it went.......long into the night.