AJ stood over Dawn, wiping the tears from his eyes, hoping that he wasn’t dreaming. If he was, he never wanted to wake up. He looked back down at her, her dark eyes looking back at him.

"Hey Angel!" He said excitedly, trying to control his excitement.

"Hey", she smiled as she tried to adjust her eyes to her surroundings.

"What happened? Why am I here? Is the baby okay?"

"Sssh, I’ll tell you everything, but you need to stay calm."

"Alex, what about the baby?" She demanded.

"The baby is fine. Healthy and growing in there."

She lay her head back on the pillow and let out a sigh of relief then closed her eyes trying to remember what happened, how she had gotten there.

"Why am I here? What happened?"

"You had some pain and D brought you to the hospital. You thought it was the baby…" his voice trailed off.

"But the baby’s fine.…just like you said."

"The baby is fine, Angel. I wouldn’t lie to you," he assured her. "Our baby isn’t ready to come out just yet. He’s a fighter just like his Mom," he smiled.

"Our baby? So you don’t think it’s Noah’s anymore?" Dawn asked, pulling her hand away and putting it protectively on her stomach.

"Angel, please," he sighed. "Let’s not do this right now, you just woke up and…"

"Fine, Alex. We won’t talk about it," she agreed, looking away from him.

AJ looked at her sadly. He had hoped that after this scare that they would be able to put what happened behind them. It was foolish of him to think so. So much had been said. He had hurt her so badly. More than he realized.

"I’ll go tell the doctor you’re awake," he whispered.

He left and returned a few minutes later with the doctor.

"Hello, Miss Simon. I’m Dr. Allen. How are you feeling?"

"Weak," she told him, barely able to keep her eyes open. "What happened?"

"I’ll leave you two alone so you can talk.  I'll go call everyone and tell them that you're awake," AJ said to Dawn. 

AJ left and Dr. Allen cleared his throat.

"When you came in you were in a great deal of pain. We checked the baby’s vital signs and they seemed to be fine. We did an ultrasound and found that one of your ovaries was twisted. We had to operate to repair it."

Dawn looked at him confused.

"Twisted? One of my ovaries?"

"That’s right. You found a cyst on your ovary that was quite large. This is most likely what caused your ovary to twist."

"You fixed it though? It’s fine now?"

"We had to remove your right ovary which…"

"You removed my ovary?" Dawn asked, shocked.

"Yes. We didn’t have a choice. There was too much damage done."

"But what about more children? Will I ever be able to…have more?" she choked out. "I didn’t even think I would be able to have this one…"

"You still have one ovary that will function normally. There's was barely any damage to the remaining ovary.   You will have a harder time getting pregnant but it is possible."

She breathed a sigh of relief.

"I’m assuming that the baby was safe during the operation. Alex told me that the baby is fine."

"Yes. We had the baby closely monitored throughout the procedure. We did have a scare with you though. You had an allergic reaction to the anesthesia which caused you to stop breathing."

Dawn felt a lump form in her throat. She stopped breathing?

"Did that affect the baby?"

"It could have but we gave you a drug to counteract the reaction and you were fine. There was no harm done to your baby," he smiled.

Dawn smiled back, relieved that she and the baby were okay.

"Thank you Doctor Allen, for everything you’ve done."

"You’re quite welcome, Miss Simon. Now let’s examine you and see how you’re doing," he smiled.

AJ sat down on a couch in the lounge and dialed Kevin’s cell.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kev, it’s Bone."

"Hey bro! How’s Dawn doing?"

"She’s awake. The doctor is in with her now."

"That’s great news! How’s she…hold on Bone…D, shut up! I’ll tell you in a minute."

AJ chuckled. He could hear D in the background.

"She’s awake, that’s all I know………because you won’t let me talk to him!!!"

"Put her on Kev," AJ laughed.

"Alright," Kevin laughed back.

"Hey! Is she alright?" D asked as soon as she took the phone from Kevin.

"She’s fine. She’s in with the doctor now."

"Good. I’m glad you were there with her when she woke up."

"Me too," he smiled.

"Tell her we’ll be there soon and that we love her."

"I will. I’ve gotta go and call my Mom. I wanna talk to my little girl before she goes to bed."

"Okay. We’ll see you later, J. Do you want to talk to Kev again since this is his phone?"

She stuck her tongue out at Kevin and he smiled and shook his head at her.

"No, that’s okay. I’ll see you guys later."

"Okay, Bye!!"

"Bye Bone!!" Kevin and Nick said simultaneously.

AJ hung up laughing. He needed his friends right now. He needed their craziness. He was glad they were there for him and Dawn. He dialed his Mom and she picked up on the second ring.

"Hey Mom!" AJ greeted.

"Hey sweetie! How’s Dawn and the baby?"

"They’re doing okay, she just woke up a little while ago. The doctor is in there now. I just hope she handles all this okay."

"She’s stron, Alex. She’ll be fine. She’s been through so much and she’s come out of it with her head high. She may have a hard time at first but you’ll be there for her as you always are."

"If she’ll let me," he sighed.

"She loves you very much and she needs you."

"But so much has happened. We already got into it a little after she woke up. She hasn’t forgotten, not that I thought she would. I just want everything to go back to the way it was. I would give anything…." his voice trailed off.

"You can’t change what’s already happened but you can move on and try to overcome it. Your love will get you through this."

"I hope," he sighed. "Can I talk to my little girl?"

"Sure can. Let me get her."

He heard Denise calling for her and heard her little squeal of delight, which made him laugh out loud.

"Daddy!"

"How’s my little Jellybean?"

"I good. Miss Mommy."

"I know, sweetie. Daddy will bring you to see Mommy soon okay?"

"Pwomise?"

"I promise. Cross my heart."

"Otay. Daddy?"

"Yes Jellybean?"

"When you come? Me want you sing me to sweep."

Her voice and her cute little way of talking always made him smile.

"I’m gonna go see Mommy again and then I’ll come and sing to you, okay?"

"Mommy better?"

"Mommy will be all better soon."

"Pwomise?"

"I promise. I love you, Jellybean."

"I wuv you too, Daddy."

"I’ll be home soon. Put Grandma back on,"

"Sorry about that," Denise laughed.

"It’s okay. I’m gonna go and see if Dawn’s okay."

"Okay, honey."

"I’ll be home soon. Arianna wants me to sing to her."

"She really misses you. It’s hard for her knowing her Mommy is sick. She needs her Daddy."

"I know. I’ll be home soon. Love you, Mom."

"I love you too, honey."

He hung up and went back to Dawn’s room. The doctor was just finishing up his exam. He left and AJ sat down and grabbed Dawn’s hand.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "I can’t believe I only have one ovary now."

"You can still have more babies. Did he tell you that?"

She nodded closing her eyes.

"But it’s been so hard so far. I don’t know, Alex."

"Hey", he picked her chin up to look at him.  "If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen".

"I know, I know", she sighed.

"I talked to D and Kevin. They send their love and they’ll be here soon to see you."

"Okay," she smiled.

"I talked to our daughter. She misses you. She wants me to come home so I can sing her to sleep."

"She loves it when you do that. You can go. She needs you right now. Tell her Mommy loves and misses her very much".

"I will, and I’ll go in a little bit," he said, stroking her arm.

They sat in silence for a while. AJ gently stroked Dawn’s hair. He thought for a minute, trying to let everything that happened in the last day sink in. He still wasn’t sure that he wasn’t dreaming, that she was really okay.

"Did I ever tell you why I call you, ‘Angel’?"

She studied his face, noticing how tired and worn he looked.

"No, I don’t think so".

"Because God sent you to me. You’re my angel. My sweet, beautiful angel", he lovingly caressed her cheek. "Everything in my life, everything in my heart, is because of you. I would be nothing without you, my life would have no meaning…."

He seemed to get lost in his words.

"Alex, what’s wrong?" Dawn asked, noticing his eyes starting to tear up.

"Nothing now, you’re okay, the baby’s okay. God gave you back to me again, this time I’m never letting you go. All this time I’ve had to sit here and think about things, what really makes me happy, what my life is really about and what’s important..."

"Alex, please. I can’t," she shook her head, trying to fight back the tears.

He ignored her and continued. He had to get it all out.

"I’m leaving the group, Angel. This next tour will be my last," he announced.

She looked at him shocked.

"Are you nuts?? You can’t do that, you can’t do that to the fans or to the rest of the guys!"

"Some things are more important. My family is more important to me than anything else. The guys will understand. I can’t juggle all of this. Something has to give. For a while there I thought I lost you forever, baby. It really made me realize that the most important thing in my life is you and our family. I don’t wanna have to leave you for months at a time. I don’t want to miss seeing our children grow up. Arianna’s gonna be going off to school before we know it. We’re gonna have a little baby, and I don’t wanna miss him getting his first tooth, learning to walk, saying his first words. My son is gonna need me. I won’t be the kind of father that my father was to me. I’m gonna be there. I’m gonna be there for it all."

Dawn just watched him talk. Even though she wanted to chuckle at his insistence that the baby was a boy, the seriousness of his words were apparent on his face.

"Alex, you’re a wonderful father. You’re ten times the father that yours ever was."

"And I’m gonna be ten times better than that. Please don’t try to change my mind about this, Angel. I’ve put a lot of thought into this and my decision is final."

Dawn just stared at him, still in shock. Her heart was breaking for him. She knew whatever she was going to say, whatever she could say wasn’t going to change is mind. Truth was, she didn’t know what to say anyway.

"You love performing. You love your job…"

"But I love you more. My priorities have changed."

"Alex, I want you to think about this some more before you drop this bomb on everyone else, especially the other guys. They can’t do it without you, and as much as I hate to say it, I know that you will never be completely mine. I will always have to share you. You and I both know that I’m not the only thing in your heart. You love your job, you love the attention, and you love singing and performing. I don’t want you to give it up."

"I’m not giving it up, I’m just putting it on hold for a while, maybe I’ll do some things part time. Things I can do where I don’t have to be away from you for long periods of time. Maybe one day we can tour together," he smiled as he looked her in the eye. "Please, don’t try to change my mind. Just support my decision."

Dawn looked in his eyes and she could see how serious he was.

"Alex, you are forgetting everything that’s happened, everything that you said…" she got choked up remembering the things he had said, and the pain it caused.

"Just forget about everything that I said, Angel. Please, I just want to be a father to our children, a full time father."

"Are you saying that you believe that this baby is yours? You believe that I didn’t sleep with Noah? You have no doubts?"

She looked him in the eye, waiting for his answer. His answer would decide their future.

Chapter 58
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