They walked along the beach with Marcus following a
few steps behind them. The beach was a little crowded, although AJ had a hat and
sunglasses on, he knew he would be recognized in no time.
So, tell me about you. Weve been doing all this talking about me all
day, Cassidy finally said.
Youre fascinating, what can I say? Im amazed by things that I dont
know about. Well, what do you want to know about me?
Ummm...
See, theres not much to tell. Everyone knows everything about me. My life is
an open book.
Oh, Im sure there are things no one knows.
She didnt know just how right she was.
What do you do when youre home, when youre not touring?
I like to shoot pool, hang out at my house. Quiet things, you know.
Do you live by yourself?
Um, well, no. He answered quietly as he stuffed his hands in his pockets.
Cassidy looked at him, puzzled by his response.
Ah, you live with someone. Your girlfriend? she asked, already sure she knew
the answer.
He took a deep breath. Yeah, she lives there.
How long have you guys been together?
On and off for about 3 years. I dont know if you could say that we do anything
together.
He looked down at the ground as he walked.
Cassidys heart was silently breaking. Not so much because he had a girlfriend, but
because she had found the source of his pain and unhappiness. Problem was, she didnt
know that she could do anything about it.
Do you want to talk about it?
AJ looked over at her, not sure if wanted to talk about it or not. He had been having such
a good time with her, he didnt want to ruin it. Truth was, he didnt know what
he would say about the situation. He was unhappy with Ashleigh, but he stayed with her
because he was afraid to be alone? He didnt want Cassidy to know that he was that
weak.
She sensed his uneasiness. Im sorry, I dont mean to pry.. her
voice trailed off.
He stopped and placed his hand on her arm. He ran his hand slowly down her arm then took
her hand in his. Their eyes locked.
Youre not prying, he smiled.
He didnt know what else to say to her. Today was the first time in a long time that
he was truly happy, aside from when he was onstage. He felt so overwhelmed.
He grazed her cheek with his finger. He knew it was too soon, but something inside of him
wanted so badly to kiss her. He was afraid she would think he was trying to take advantage
of her. It was all so clear to him now, all this time he was unable to explain why he felt
the way he did about her. Now he knew...
Suddenly, a group of women recognized him and ran up to him wanting autographs and
pictures. Cassidy stood off to the side as he stood there with Marcus for a few minutes
obliging the fans. She watched how he interacted with the fans, it was obvious how much he
loved and appreciated them. As she stood watching him, she was struck with a sudden
revelation.
What am I doing? Cassidy asked herself. I dont fit in his life,
friend or otherwise, were too different. I have to stop this before it goes any
further.
She was afraid of what may have, what probably would have happened between her and AJ, had
those fans not appeared. Although they had just met, her feelings for him went a lot
deeper then she could admit to him. She started to walk away then turned around once more
and looked back at him.
I was crazy to think otherwise, she turned and walked away quickly, heading
back towards the hotel.
Just as she was about to open the door, she heard someone running after her and calling
her name. She didnt turn around, she knew who it was.
Damn it Alex, dont make this harder on me than it already is, she
whispered as she walked inside the hotel.
Tears were starting to well up in her eyes. She pressed the button, hoping the elevator
would already be there. Unfortunately, it wasnt.
Come on, come on. Hurry up, she pleaded with the elevator. Her pleas did no
good, as AJ reached her before the elevator appeared.
Where are you going? Why did you leave like that? he asked, out of breath.
I just have to get going, she answered, not looking at him. She didnt
want him to see the tears in her eyes.
Why? Werent you even gonna say good bye?
Im sorry, I didnt want to interrupt you... her voice trailed off.
Cassidy, look at me, please.
She took a deep breath and turned around to face him. As she looked him in the eye, she
felt her tears start to fall down her cheek.
Whats wrong? he asked softly as he wiped her tears away with his finger.
Tell me.
I wish I could explain it, she replied softly. I just know that this, us
meeting, was not a good idea. I should have known better.
What do you mean?? It was a great idea! I cant remember the last time I was
this happy. Youre like, a ray of sunshine in my life. You have no idea what
youve done for me, how you make me feel. Ever since I got your letter I havent
been able to think of anything else but you. Now that Ive found you, I cant
imagine just letting you go...not having you in my life... his voice trailed off. He
hadnt intended on telling her any of that, it just came out. Please dont
walk away from me, he pleaded.
There is no room in your life for me, Alex. Plus, you dont even know me.
I know how I feel, and I know you feel something too or you wouldnt be running
away. I also know that I want to get to know you. I want to know everything about you. You
just have to give me the chance.
As she gazed into his emotion filled eyes she wanted nothing more than to give in to him,
but she knew she couldnt. Amongst other things, he had a girlfriend, and weather or
not he was happy with her, he still had one. There was no room for her in his life, just
as there was no room in her life for him.
Im sorry Alex. I have to go, she said as the elevator door opened,
Take care of yourself.
She gave him a soft kiss on the cheek and got onto the elevator. She turned around and
their eyes locked once again right before the doors closed. He was left standing there sad
and confused as Cassidy broke down in tears.