The Official Vegan Webpage

Real Ultimate Power

Hi, this site is all about vegans, REAL VEGANS.  This site is awesome.    My name is Robert and I can't stop thinking about vegans.  These guys are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.

Facts:

1.    Vegans are mammals.

2.    Vegans cook ALL the time.

3.    The purpose of the vegan is to flip out and lecture people.

Weapons and gear:

Fruits                                Vegetables    

Punk Rock!

Testimonial:

Vegans can cook anytime they want!  Vegans chop up vegetables ALL the time and don't even think twice about it.  These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time.  I heard that there was this vegan who was eating at a diner.  And when some dude dropped a spoon the vegan lectured the whole town on ethical sustainable living.  My friend Ed said that he saw a vegan totally eat the brains of some kid just because the kid ate a cow.

And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't believe that vegans have REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or they will eat your tasty, tasty brains!!!  It's an easy choice, if you ask me.  

Vegans are sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants.  I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart.  These guys are totally awesome and that's a fact.  Vegans are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet.  I can't wait to start modern dance next year.  I love vegans with all of my body (including my pee pee).    

Q and A:.

Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about vegans?

A: Vegans are the ultimate paradox. On the one hand they don't give a crap, but on the other hand, vegans are very careful and precise.

Q: I heard that vegans are always straight-edge.  What's their problem?

A: Whoever told you that is a total liar.  Just like other mammals, vegans can be straight-edge OR totally awesome. 

Q: What do vegans do when they're not cooking or flipping out and giving lectures?

A: Most of their free time is spent rocking out to punk, but sometime they eat human brains.  (Ask Ed if you don't believe me.)

Q: Why do vegans always listen to punk rock?

A: Folk music gets really old really quickly.

This is a picture of my best friend Ed showing off.

He's a lot older than me and almost done with puberty,

which is bragable.