I got my first horse when I was 10, picked out by that same aunt. After reading "The Black Stallion" way too much, I was not enthused about a grey pony mare with pink skin around her eyes. But Bayberry had a heart of gold, and a keen intellect. We used to say she was a pony by an eight of an inch and a brain...
Bay and I took almost two years to really bond. She wasn't convinced of my leadership, and I wasn't sure she would ever see me as more than an obligation. But in the end, I proved my worth to her, and she earned my respect in the process. Now Bayberry is 33, retired from many years of being in a handicapped riding program. She still greets me as a familiar when I go to visit.
During the times in my life where things were not peaceful or agreeable, I habitually retreated to the barn. I swear by the time I hit middle school, I spoke "horse" better than I spoke "person." By age fourteen I had a wonderful thoroughbred gelding named Blue, and he meant more to me than any teenage crush could have. He was my rescue horse, costing $600 when we saved him from a dairy farm. Blue Moon gained almost 200 lbs in the first month I had him. Once he was rideable again, I revelled in his elderly knowledge of third level dressage! At one show, we did a first-level freestyle that I worked on for weeks. When our big moment came, we were disqualified because Blue did two-tempis across the diagonal. It was an exhilirating moment, and even though there was no ribbon, I remember with a smile how hard the crowd clapped for him. He must've been quite a sight...the gallant old steed back in the show-ring.
When Blue died two years after I found him, it broke my heart. I came home one summer evening in late twilight, running eargerly out to the pasture to introduce a new friend to my beloved horse. At first I thought he was just lying down, but then I realized... His body was still warm, and I curled up with him and sobbed as the heat ebbed away. I didn't want to ride after that, and horses became an on-again off-again kind of thing.
It took me a long time to get over Blue's death. His sensitivity and dignity had helped us form a deep bond from the moment I met him. He was one of life's rare gifts,and even the way he came into my life was unique. One afternoon when I was home from boarding school, browsing through the ads of a local paper, I found an ad that read "Third level dressage horse, $600." Its not often you see an ad like that. And even if you do, usually the horse is already gone by the time you call. I called, and the rest is history.
After Blue's death, I had one brief bout of riding that ended quickly as I sank into a funk. I went to college a year later, and when I signed up for riding lessons the following spring, I discovered I had inherited my dad's allergies to horses. I was allergic to the very thing I loved the most! Horses had sheltered me during every bad thing that had happened to me, and suddenly I couldn't be around them. It started out as itchy eyes and throat. No major problem as long as I washed my hands right after I rode. But then other things in my life really fell apart, and the ensuing trauma made my allergies worse. It became so bad that I couldn't even breathe after touching horses. It took me years to get back on my feet, and during that period in my life, my creativity was very cut off. I didn't ride, or write,for a long time.
Six years after I left horses, someone told me about Bashkir Curlies. I spent hours researching everything about them, and looking at "for sale" pages. A year later, I found Sage.
Owning Sage is my first experience working with a youngster. When I first got him, he wasn't just green...he was completely untrained. I soon found out how quickly he could learn, as he mastered everything from stalls to picking up his feet and being groomed in the first month. Having him is a revitalizing experience, but has not erased the fear I feel at reconnecting with a horse, that like all of us, could die someday and leave me. Even as a three-year-old, Sage's patience and sense of humor are teaching me to conquer my fear. He is calm, but sensitive, and entertains everyone around him. After only a year of owning him, I already have a whole collection of stories...