Blood Roses
By Jen
Disclaimer: Joss owns Spike and Dru. Tori Amos owns the lyrics to Blood Roses. Our Lady Peace owns the lyrics to The Story of 100 Aisles. I own everything else in the story.
Blood roses
Blood roses
Back on the street now
Can't forget the things you never said
On days like these get me thinking
She pulled the long coat closer to her body, shivering. She was thinking of him again. She knew she shouldn't, it just made it worse, especially knowing what she was about to do. She thought of the last time she had seen him. He had looked at her, at what she had become. It was so much harder without him. She knew everything that was happening, everything that had happened. She was different now; she wasn't the person he had loved. She wished that day never happened, that everything would be the same. She would be insane again, oblivious of the rest of the world, and he would keep her safe, love her. But she had her soul back, her mortality and her sanity. He could never love her like that. He was evil, if he ever saw her again he would kill her, she knew it. Maybe she shouldn't have left so soon, she could've just let him kill her. She had a fantasy that he would love her the way she was, no matter if she was good or evil. It was too late for that now. She wasn't even good, she had been tainted already. He would never take her back knowing what she had done.
When chickens get a taste of your meat
Chickens get a taste of your meat
She emerged from the alley onto the street. There were three or four girls already there. She knew one of them named Amber. Amber found her wandering the streets and got her into all of this. Drusilla hated it, hated what it had made her. If she left, she'd starve. If she stayed it would kill her. A black Mercedes pulled up to the curb and the man driving it opened the door.
"How much?" he asked.
"Whatever you 'ave is fine," Drusilla said as she got in the car and shut the door. She showed him the route to her apartment, which wasn't far from the street corner where he picked her up.
While they were walking up to her floor, he started to talk to her.
"So what's your name?"
"Drusilla," she answered quietly.
"Is that a British accent?" he asked as she unlocked the door.
She didn't say anything, but led him to the bedroom. He started to take off his clothes and she did the same. She lied down on the hard mattress, preparing herself for what was to come. He started to screw her, and she closed her eyes and pretended she was somewhere else. He hit her hard across her face multiple times, and the tears came.
You gave him your blood
And your warm little diamond
He likes killing you after you're dead
You think I'm a queer?
I think you're a queer
I think you're a queer
Said I think you're a queer
And I shaved every place where you've been
I shaved every place that you've been, boy
God knows I know I've thrown away those graces
God knows I know I've thrown away those graces
God knows I know I've thrown away those graces
After what seemed like an eternity he got off of her and put on his clothes. He threw a wad of money at her battered body, as she covered herself with the sheets and tried to forget what had happened.
The Belle of New Orleans tried to show me
Once how to tango
Wrapped around your feet
Wrapped around like good little roses
Blood roses
Blood roses
Back on the street now
Now you've cut out the flute
From the throat of the loon
At least when you cry now
He can't even hear you
When chickens get a taste of your meat
When he sucks you deep
Sometimes you're nothing but meat
The next morning Drusilla woke up and counted the money lying beside her. Two hundred dollars, pretty good for one trick. She got out of the bed and walked into the shower. The warm water felt good against her skin. She grabbed the soap off the shower hanger. She felt an uncontrollable need to cleanse herself, trying to make all her sins go away. She cut her arm with her fingernail, letting the blood mix in with the hard water, turning it a pinkish color. She did it again on the other arm, then on her stomach, chest and legs, sobbing the whole time. She collapsed onto the dirty floor of the shower and grabbed a razor blade. With her hand shaking she slowly put it against her wrist.
Help yourself
If you know why you came
Cause if you needed help she says.
There's something I've got saved
Spike walked down the dirty alleyway, leaving his victim to bleed to death while screaming in agony. He walked up the street to a punk girl who looked around 16. She had short purple hair and just about every possible place on her body either pierced or tattooed. It was amazing what people would do to themselves just to piss off their parents.
"Hello lovely." he said as he ran his finger along her neck.
"Hi," she said in a low voice. "you want more?�
"of course luv," Spike said, throwing down the second bottle of liquor he had drunk that night. "How much will it cost me?"
"Pay me tomorrow, and you better show cause you know I can get you whatever you need." she said as she handed him a bag with filled with small white pills. "See ya around"
Spike watched her run down the street and turn at the corner.
"Better still work," he mumbled as he walked up to the place he was staying.
This is not what you wanted
These candy-coated fakes
This is not what you wanted
This is pain
This is pain
Anacin, we're stumbling again
Anacin,
We're stumbling again
And it's the story of 100 aisles
He couldn't believe what had happened. She just ran away from him, not saying anything. He could never forget the look in her eyes, it was a look of sheer terror. If only she had stayed, he could have helped her. Maybe he could have even made her again. He didn't even need her to be a demon again, he would still love her. How could she have done this to him, she knew he couldn't live without her. This was killing him, he needed her so badly.
He walked into the lobby of the shabby motel and took the elevator up to his room. As he laid down on the bed he popped a few pills into his mouth. He waited for what seemed like hours until he realized they were starting to work. Suddenly he didn't care about Drusilla. He didn't care about anything anymore. He would be content to just lie there forever, with nothing to complicate things.
Walk away from simple on a tray
Cause if you need help she says
These fancy pills don't rate
This is not what you wanted
A miracle today
This is not what you wanted
This is pain
This is pain
Spike woke with a horrible pain in his head. He slowly got out of the bed and walked into the bathroom. He splashed some water onto his face. He had dreamed of her, she was lying beside him and stroking his face while he was sleeping. He woke up in the dream, and she held him and told him everything would be alright. He popped a few more pills into his dry mouth and crawled back into bed. He waited and waited until they started to work. They didn't work for him anymore, he was still thinking about her. Her eyes, her lips, her body were all etched in his mind. But he couldn't stop. He needed them, they weren't very strong but without them he could barely get through the day. He told himself that he wasn't going to take them anymore, her had to go find Dru. He would get her and they would be happy again.
Anacin, we're stumbling again
Anacin,
We're stumbling again
And it's the story of 100 aisles
Time is not for sale today
Time seems so far away
Time is not for sale today
You need more than this
Depressed come here try this
He walked out onto the street and saw a few whores standing under a streetlight. He thought maybe if he had a women for a while it would get his mind off of Dru.
Drusilla woke to freezing cold water rushing onto her back. She slowly got her bearings and turned off the shower. Must have passed out before I cut myself she thought. She got out of the shower and pulled on a towel. She looked outside; it was already dark. She went into her drawer and pulled on a tight shirt and mini-skirt as she went out the door. She walked down the street to the corner where all the other girls were. Things were pretty slow this early, but she did see a man approaching one of the other girls.
I would die for you
I would die for you
I've been dying just to
Feel you by my side
To know that you're mine
"What's your name?" Spike said to a blonde girl in a tight dress.
"Amber. What's yours?"
"That doesn't matter, how much do you-" Spike saw Drusilla out of the corner of his eye. He ran up to her and grabbed her arm.
"Drusilla."
I will cry for you
I will cry for you
I will wash away your pain with all my tears
And drown you with fear
Drusilla turned and looked into Spike's eyes.
"Oh god," she said and broke away from his grasp.
She ran down the street as fast as she could. Her heels came off halfway down the first block and her feet were cut by glass and rocks.
I will pray for you
I will pray for you
I will sell my soul
For something pure and true
Someone like you
Spike cursed as he ran after her. She went into an apartment building and he followed her in. She ran up two flights of stairs and Spike got to the top just in time for her to lock the door in his face.
"Dammit Dru let me in!" He yelled as he pounded on the door.
See your face every place that I'm walking
Hear your voce every time that I'm talking
You will believe in me
And I will never be ignored
Dru ran frantically around the small rooms looking for some kind of weapon. She could hear him breaking the door down so she decided to run into the bathroom.
I would burn for you
Feel pain for you
I will twist a knife
And bleed my aching heart
And tear it apart
I will lie for you
Beg and steal for you
I will crawl on hands and knees
Until you see
That you're just like me
She shut and locked the door just as Spike broke down the door. She sat down on the floor and cried silently, hoping he wouldn't come in. She saw the razor blade she had left on the floor earlier in the evening. She reluctantly picked it up and slit her left wrist, going with the vein. She screamed in pain as the blood rushed out onto the tile floor. She picked up the razor again, barely having enough strength to put it against her right wrist.
Violate all the love that I'm missing
Throw away the pain that I'm living
You will believe in me
And I can be ignored
Spike heard a scream of pain through the bathroom door. He rushed over to it and heard another scream. He kicked down the door and saw Dru lying in a pool of blood. He knelt down and lifted her head up.
"Don't leave me baby, please don't leave me," Spike said through sobs.
"Spike," Drusilla whispered, realizing what she had done. "I love you."
"I love you too baby,"
"I don't want to die Spike. Don't let me die,"
"Shh, it's alright. You'll be fine." Spike lied.
Drusilla closed her eyes, she was so tired. Her breaths became further and further apart until they stopped completely.
"Oh god no. Dru, wake up." He said as he shook her limp body. "Wake up!" He screamed.
I would die for you
I would kill for you
I will steal for you
I'd do time for you
I will wait for you
I'd make room for you
I'd sail ships for you
To be close to you
To be part of you
Cause I believe in you
I believe in you
I would die for you
Spike calmed himself and laid Drusilla's body on the floor. He gathered her up in his arms again and managed to carry her to the bed. He gently put her down on the bed and sat down next to her. He held her and kissed her forehead as he broke off a piece of the bed frame. He closed his eyes as he drove the piece of wood into his heart, spilling blood over both their bodies. He closed his eyes, blocking out the pain. He laid himself and Drusilla down onto the bed, and died in her arms.