Title: A toast to life.
Author: Adalisa Zarate
Email: [email protected]

Feedback: I can't live without it.
Distribution: Mama Chelle's site and my site. Anywhere else, just ask. I won't say no.
Web site: http://members.tripod.com/luxshine/

Summary: Xander looks very familiar to Angel, and he remembers his first years in America.
Rating: PG-13 (I think)

Disclaimer: Xander, Angel, the Watchers and Slayers are creation of Joss Wheldon and are owned by Warner Brothers and Mutant Enemy. However, LaVelle, his father, and Maia are mine.

Content X/Angel.
Notes: Answer to the 100th member challenge by Niccy. Hope you all like it.
Spoilers: Angel, Prophecy Girl, Becoming. Basically that's all.
Dedication: To every single one of the 100 members here ^_^

Sunnydale, 1996

The first time they meet, he was so enthralled by Buffy, so worried about the Anointed One, that he barely noticed him. But now, as they were in his apartment, and the boy urged him to go and help Buffy, Angel couldn't help but wonder why he never noticed before.

It was the same face.... the same voice....

Somewhere in the Atlantic, 1890

"Mister? Are you ill?" The youthful voice took Angel out of his hungry dizziness. He hadn't feed in two days, since he took the ship that would carry him to America, away from all his memories and tormentors in Europe. Of course, there were many humans on board, but the mere thought of feeding from them made his soul cringe with pain. He was starting to consider suicide as a beautiful option. That was why he was on the second deck now, watching the stars and wondering if he had the courage to stay up until day, or if he would simply let himself die from hunger, when the boy approached him.

He wasn't older than 16 or 17, brown hair grown to the shoulders, although it wasn't exactly fashionable, brown eyes enlightened by long eyelashes and lifted eyebrows, a subtle trace of a beard in his chin, almost imperceptible in the dim light of the stars. His smile was carefree and cheerful, and something in it made Angel smile back. "No... Just a little seasick."

"You too?" The boy laughed, a sound that Angel thought that was odd. He had never heard such a joyous laugh, at least not since his turning into a cruel, hideous monster. "All this movement has made me almost regret my wish of seeing the world..."

"I've been regretting that for a long time." Angel answer was short and cutting, but the boy seemed not to notice. Instead, he offered his hand to the vampire.

"LaVelle. From France."

"Angel. From Ireland." Angel found himself answering the greet, and the boy seemed a little surprised, but his smile never failed. "Is LaVelle your first name?" the vampire asked, curious.

"No, it's my surname... I hate my name. It's too long." As Lavelle chuckled, Angel couldn't help but laugh too, and it took a few seconds before both sobered. "You want to get something to eat? I'm starving..."

Before Angel could say anything, or think of a good excuse, another voice, female and a little too loud, came to them.

"LaVelle! Your father needs you, right now!" LaVelle turned around, shrugging his shoulders, at the same time that he smiled.

"Never fails. Seems like I'm destined to never have a good time...See you around, mate." Then, he was gone.

Angel couldn't help but smile at that. As he returned to his cabin, he saw a fleeing rat... without even thinking about it, he caught it and, once in his safe room, he drank from it. Somehow, the idea of seeing again the cheerful boy gave him the strength of will to eat, and see another night.

A whole week passed, and he didn't saw LaVelle again. Apparently, as joyous as he was, the French boy was more of a day person. In his few travels up deck, Angel could see LaVelle's companions: A tall, bearded man who seemed more like a Viking than anything else, always carrying a staff with him, and a young girl, no more than 16, red haired and slightly muscular. Something in the girl made Angel feel nervous, so he tried to stay as far from her as was possible in the ship. At nights, he feed on the rats he could catch, and walked in the lower decks, away from the passengers.

But as he was letting himself get again in a depressive mood, wondering about how much courage he would need to use a stake on himself, LaVelle caught with him again.

"Angel! I thought I wouldn't see you again!" They were in the upper deck now, watching the sea roar. The boy was still cheerful, although Angel could see that he had a black eye.

"I'm more of a night person." He answered, wondering about his reasons to talk to the mortal being.

"I know. My sister is like that too..." He said, falling silent for a second. "If I fall asleep again in one of our training sessions, she'll kill me."

"Training?" Angel asked, a bit curious "Is that how you got the black eye?"

"I know, I know. A girl beat me. That's embarrassing." LaVelle looked at the sea, and sighed. "If I were you, I would be more careful in America. Nights can be dangerous." Angel turned to see the young man face, who was suddenly serious. He was clenching a necklace that Angel hadn't noted the first night: A silver cross in a silver chain.

"What do you mean?" Angel asked, a little surprised to see the happy boy so gloomy.

"I cannot tell you. You wouldn't believe me anyway. Just be careful, o.k. They prefer young people... Try not to be outside at night."

They fell silent again, and Angel found himself looking at his companion, studying his face, his posture, his neck...

"Here." Said LaVelle, taking off his necklace and putting it in a white handkerchief. "I know it's not fancy, but it will protect you"

"LaVelle!! You useless boy, where are you!?" The large man that was LaVelle's companion walked towards them, and, without paying any attention to Angel, grabbed the boy's arm and carried him away. "What kind of Watcher will you be if you cannot do a simple research? Can't you understand that you are not to have any free time!?" They walked away, but that was more than enough to make Angel already cold heart froze even more. He knew very well what a Watcher was... The one who guided the Slayer... And if LaVelle was a Watcher... That meant that he would, sooner or later, be the cause of Angel's death.

The vampire didn't talk with LaVelle again in the rest of the trip. Especially because he was trying to avoid him and his companion. However, from time to time he overheard the taller man's shouts... who obviously didn't grasp the concept of secrecy, and learned that it was the tall man who was the Watcher... and LaVelle's father. The girl was the Slayer, and they had been posted in America, because of the growing number of vampires in the New World. He also happened to hear that the tall man and the girl used to beat LaVelle, using the training as an excuse.

And even so, every night, he saw LaVelle in the main deck, watching the stars, smiling.

New York City, 1892

Angel sat in the empty alley, holding a cat corpse in his hands. He hadn't been able to get a good meal in a long time, and was starting to feel the first evidences of hunger, when two men threw a third one inside, obviously ready to mug him.

At first, the vampire tried to meld in the darkness, unwilling to get in any kind of trouble in his weakened state. He saw how the third man tried to reach something in his coat, but one of the first hissed, and threw himself over him. And his face shifted. They were vampires.

Angel was frozen in his place, as he had never meet another of his kind in America.

But when he managed to see the face of their victim, he felt what little blood he had left boil.

Because it was LaVelle... the young man who had offered him his friendship two years ago in a ship.

Without thinking, he attacked one of the vampires, shifting face to look more menacing, freeing LaVelle with the action. The young boy managed to hit the other, and, taking of the stake that he was holding, dust him. Then, he turned to see his savior, and his face turned to shock, when he recognized Angel, as both his old friend and a vampire.

Even so, the young would be Watcher managed to dust the evil vampire, leaving them both alone.

"You're a vampire." The young man said, almost without emotion in his voice. But, as Angel noted, he didn't lift the stake to defend himself. "But you helped me now... Why?"

Before Angel could answer, the redheaded girl appeared, her clothes a little ragged. "Alexander... You did managed against those two, right? Now we have to go and help your father... and this time don't make me loose my time." She was gone in almost a second, and LaVelle sighed.

"I have to go now... I won't tell her that you are a vampire... but if I were you, I would be very careful. Maia is very hard to beat."

"Maybe I can help?" Angel started, surprising himself. LaVelle looked at him, questioningly, and then handed him a stake.

"I must be insane..." he muttered, and began walking, Angel following behind, amazed at the trust that the boy had placed in him. And found himself staring again.

"Stop looking at my neck." The boy said, and walked a little faster, before Angel could answer.

Chicago, 1894

"Next time you try to do something as stupid as that, please, tell me with some advance" LaVelle complained as he entered the apartment, although Angel could detect the usual cheerfulness of his human friend. "I mean.. Offering me as a vampire snack is not the best way to get in a vampire lair."

"It worked." Angel interjected, as he sat in the very uncomfortable couch that was the only furniture piece. "And you owned me one... You did offered me as a sacrifice for the mad gypsy priest..."

LaVelle laughed, marking that way the end of their argument. As always. But something still nagged in Angel's mind.

"Wouldn't you prefer if you had an Slayer to back you up?" He asked, dreading the answer.

"Don't you remember Maia? After her, I don't want to see another Slayer in my life. And I never asked to be a Watcher, Angel... this is only something I do because I don't like demons roaming free." LaVelle sat at his side, smiling openly. "Besides... they threw me out, remember? Because I was friend of a vampire."

"Souled vampire"

"Yeah, so you say." LaVelle patted Angel shoulder and stood up again. "I'm going to take a nap. I don't want to know anything about demons in at least a week."

Angel watched as his mortal friend left the room, with something more than mild curiosity. It was true that, a year ago, after Maia's death and the discovery by LaVelle's father that Angel was a vampire, the boy had been expelled from the Watcher's guild. It was also true that LaVelle had convinced him to go around, hunting whatever that needed to be hunt, and to move in together. But what Angel still didn't understood was why he had accepted. Although, ever since LaVelle had entered his life, he hadn't thought of dying anymore. It was almost like being completely alive.

Chicago, 1896

"Can't you open it?" LaVelle asked, a little worried now. It was strange for Angel to hear him like that, when the young man was always smiling, no matter what.

However, with an open wound in his chest, it seemed unlikely.

"It's useless... I'm too weak."

"I... told you... to eat before we left..." LaVelle managed to say, before coughing up blood. That sigh made Angel's heart froze and he kneeled down to hold him.

"Don't talk LaVelle... I will get you out of this..." Angel promised, although he hadn't a single idea of how. All of it had been a plan gone wrong. A simple thing, with a satanic cult... but somehow everything had gone terribly wrong. LaVelle had been mortally wounded with a iron staff, and both had been captured afterwards. Now, they were waiting for the sunrise, which would kill Angel... and for the wound to kill LaVelle.

"You can't open that, unless you have feed before... And with more than the animal blood that you take." LaVelle began to take off his jacket, with a painful expression... Upon seeing that, Angel paled.

"LaVelle.. What are you doing?"

"The way things are going, Angel... we're both going to die... I'm going to die anyway... And that is very stupid." The young man closed his eyes, a little pale now. "So what you're going to do... you're going to feed from me.. before I die. Then you will be able to escape from here."

"LaVelle... Don't be stupid. We can think of another plan..."

"There's no time, Angel... I'm dying... and we both know it..."

"Why? Why are you doing this?"

"You don't know?" LaVelle chuckled again, but he coughed more blood. "And I thought I was the dense one." Straining his neck, the young man managed to place a kiss on the vampire's lips. "I love you, Angel... and I wish we had more time."

"LaVelle...I.. I love you too, please, don't die... don't make me kill you..."

"Alexander... That's my name. Angel... And I have loved you since I meet you in that ship, that's why I gave you my cross... it was my mother's and... well, I won't bore you with that story... so I really don't mind, dying to save the man I love... Please bite me and promise me that you won't die. That you will be able to escape and go along. Because... maybe... we will meet again... I just hope I could tell you when..."

Angel just nodded, feeling tears in his eyes. Then, Alexander LaVelle exposed his neck to him, knowing fully that the smell of blood would be more than enough to call the vampire, even if his moral restraints were against it. And when he closed his eyes, the last thing he felt were the fangs of the man he loved piercing his skin.

Sunnydale, 1996

"Stop looking at my neck." Xander said, without looking back.

"What?" Angel was startled. It was the same voice, the same words... But it wasn't be the same man... It couldn't be the same man.

"You were checking my neck, I saw that!" Xander insisted, without turning back.

"No, I wasn't"

"Just keep your distance, pal."

"I wasn't looking at your neck." Although he really was, as he had been amazed at the incredible resemblance between Xander and the young Watcher to be that he had meet in a ship, a hundred years ago.

"I told you to eat before we left." Hearing that, a slightly annoyed tone with an underlying joke, Angel lifted up his face... just in time to see Xander slight smile. A carefree smile, even in the toughest situation. The smile that had made him carry on for one hundred years, with the slightest hope of seeing it again.

He was the same boy, the same young man, in face, in words... in soul....

And when it came down to it... that was the only thing that mattered.

But now he had to save Buffy, and stop the Master. But still he had one doubt...

"LaVelle?" He asked... half afraid of what he would hear.

"Is my second name. And I hate it... too long." Then he turned, smiling. And before Angel could do anything, the boy kissed him in the lips. "Later, Angel. This time... We'll get out of this, together."

The end.