20 Questions With Chris “Nads” Mazzara

 

Peatage recently had an opportunity to sit down with its #1 prospect for next season, Chris Mazzara.  Chris has a bright future in the Peatage organization so it is important we get to know him a little better…

 

1.  Why are you named after male genetalia?  It's a play off of my last
name.  Some friends call me Mazz (short for Mazzara).  Casey overheard this
and said "Who the hell is Nads?"  Hence, the legacy is born.

2.  When were you first introduced to Peetage?  I knew of the team for a
while, but I went to and played in my first game this past fall after
passing Casey's "Fundamental Skills Exam"

3.  What position do you normally play?  DH

4.  On a scale of 1 to 10.  1 being a Wintergarden urinal and 10 being an
all
star, rate the following ball players:

Chcuk Knobloch=0...Dumb last name and a cry baby
Mookie Wilson=10...cool name and damn good player too
Oil can Boyd=15...need I say more?
Mark McGwire=5...Injury prone and too huge...kinda like Jimmy
Barry Bonds=3...Good player, but a jackass
Craig Kelley=12...He's no Oil Can Boyd, but he is the man

5.  What past baseball experience do you have?  I played tee ball when I was
five and have won numerous home run derbys in various locations around
Livonia

6.  What Livonia men’s league team we've played should give it up and call it
a day?  The Jesus people.  What were they...Church of Our Lord the Savior of
our Light Purple Monkey Dishwasher or something dumb like that?  Who knows.

7.  Do you enjoy being called Nads? Doesn't bother me

8.  What do you enjoy the most about Peetage?  The camaraderie and the
atmosphere.  It's funny to see Anthony get denied by the IHOP waitresses

9.  Finish these sentences:

Tim Orow likes your mom
I can tell the difference between the Krimm twins by their hats and their
noses
I like __________ most about our website "The picture of Philippe"
Sometimes when Carl isn’t looking I hit him with a bat, but he's such a
monster, he doesn't even feel it
If I had 1 wish, I would wish for a tee time at Augusta National Golf Club

10.  What do you remember about the following years:

1983= Hearing "Return of the Jedi" from the womb
1988= Getting a Don Zimmer baseball card and laughing my ass off
1993= Listening to Led Zeppelin for the first time
1998= Not much...it was a pretty boring year
2001= College, Peatage, Formation of Backseat Rhythm

11.  Has Chris Mazzara ever:

Tried Vaseline on toast=  I would be a communist if I hadn't
Often wondered what it would be like to be fat=  Every day
Broken his guitar over someone’s head= not yet.  I will when we play our
fifth night at Madison Square Garden though.  Who wants it?
Burped in the dentists chair= Yes
Gotten to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop=  Oh yeah.

12.  Word Association.  Mention the first thing that comes to you when you
hear:

Boner= Augusta National Golf Club
Jimmy Moore= Cell phone
Catcher= Holden Caulfield
Backseat Rhythm= The next Led Zeppelin
Monkeys= Reece’s peanut butter cups
Abnormal sexual psychology= Jimmy Moore

13.  Name all the positions you've played on the field, and which one's
did you like the most?  Well, um...catcher i guess

14.  What are your plans for the offseason this winter?  School at CMU,
getting huge for the season.

15.  Describe some of the ways you're promoting www.peatage.com at CMU and
Ann Arbor.
Every time I see a message board on somebody's door, i write peatage.com on
it.  It works.

16.  If you were actually nads, would you want to be the right one or the
left one?  The right one.  No question about it.

17.  Have you ever played basebell in pouring rain with white pants on?  Who
hasn't

18.  Where do you see yourself fitting into the lineup next year?
Infield hopefully.

19.  Who is your favorite fan!?   Either Amy, Laura, or Matt

20.  Did you enjoy your 20 questions Chris "Nads" Mazzara?  (Also use this
space to say anything you want or plug your stuff/website/merchandise)
Yes.  I have nothing to say really.  Um...Boogie Nights is a damn good
movie.  Everybody should watch it.