WITH CRAIG KELLEY 4/25/02

There are some things is life that are just too good for words.  This is one of those things.  It's time to cap off the illustrious 20Q era with the best of the best.  These questions were recorded on a mini tape at the Gunner family dinner table.  Here is 20 Questions with our one and only Hall of Famer....ahhh....Craig Kelley with some bonus post interview dialouge!


1.  Even if you say otherwise, you enjoy when teammates sneak into your garage and film you while you're enjoying "Gunner time" in the garage right?

Oh sure sure.  Theres nothing quite like it.  I haven't even figured out what it is haha.  It's my smoking lounge.

2.  You won the hardcore award so many f'n times the award was finally renamed the Craig A. Kelley Hardcore Award.  Also, your jersey was officially retired at the end of the season party and that posterboard now hangs in your office with valuable Peetage signatures on it.  What do you think your biggest accomplishment was?

Biggest accomplishment!?  Retirement!  That's the best thing I could do for the team was retire!

3.  When were you first introduced to the team and what did you think?

That was the fall season of 99 I think.  I thought it was an interesting mix of younger and older guys.  The 2 games a night took it's toll on the older guys.  I didn't care for that very much. I survived.

4.  My dad said Chevys a bastard car.  Since you work for Ford and are familier with the industry give us your thoughts on this and the Ford situation.

Of course the Chevys a bastard car!!!  Ford is sturggling right now profit wise but that's because we give so much for the money it hurts the company.  The customer gets his money worth.

5.  On a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being ahhh and 10 being you guys,
rate the following ball players:

Mark McGwire= Ahh, he's up there pretty good.   I would say about an 8.  If he weren't taking drugs he'd be a 10.
Barry Bonds= Ahh, he's a little bit of ahh, he's got a little attitude problem with the press but he's still up there around 7.
Mike O'Neil= Mike O'Neil,  10 all the way.  Reliable, always there when you need him
White Sox all star catcher Carlton Fisk= Carton Fisk, my hero!
Tim Orow without his cats= Tim Orow without his cats, ahh, about an 8.  Maybe 9
Anthony Ciatti with mustard= With mustard, 3.

6.  What past baseball experience do you have?

Jr. high.  I decided I couldn't play baseball, football, and basketball.  I played second base.  I caught a little, pitched a little.  I did a little of everything.

7.  Do you ever wish you had a son?

Ahh, from what I've seen of you guys (Matt and Casey) no I'm glad I don't have a son.

8.  Finish these sentences:

The best thing about our website is ahh, that's a good one, that's a good one....AHH, the player profiles.
One time when no one was looking I looked up my own batting average.  HAHA.  I wanted to wait until no one was looking!
I would have rather have sons because only because of wedding expenses!
I think the word Peetage really means ya got guts enough to show up no matter what
Ahh CRAP
If I had one wish I would wish for continued success for Peetage. How about a championship for Peetage.

9.  List your 3 favorite things about being on the team.

Well it's the camaraderie and the heritage of the team.  I tried to live up to that as a challenge.  The after game ahh celebration and ahh....post game shenanigans?  Post game shenanigans.

10.  If you were stuck in an elevator and could have 2 teammates with you,
who would they be and why ?

HAHA.  I think you (Matt) and Casey because that would be amusing anyway.

11.  Has Craig Kelley ever:

Picked up chicks with the motorcycle= No
Been knocked unconcious at home plate=  HAHA, yeah.  Almost unconcious how's that.  Semi-unconcious anyway.
Called Laura "Larry" because you really wanted a boy= Nope, never did that, haha.
Outbenched Carl= I don't think so, I don't think so.  I couldn't even press THE BENCH.
Taken steroids, creatine, or other body building suppliments= Other than Strohs no.
Just wanted to dance= I just wanted to have the strength left after a game to be able to dance.

12.  Who is your favorite former Peatage player? (Ex: Lorne, Kyle, Scott,
Jeff, Gary, Ritz, Jimmy "airwolf" Moore, Craig, Mark (Scott Krimm's brother
in law))

(Most people pick you!)

Ahh, I think I miss Kyle.  He was always fun.

13.  Tell us a story about your military service.

A military service story. Hmm.  The food isn't all that bad.  The most fun I had was the morning I was over in Vietnam and the morning I was leaving for R and R.  I was going to be out of the country for a week.  What's R and R?  Rest and Recoupriation when you get to go out of the country.  I was going to Sidney Austraillia at 4 in the morning and it had been raining all night.  There was about 3 inches of water on the floor of the barriks, and we got 105 rounds landed in our motor pool and when those go off it gets pretty scarey so you roll off the bunk onto the floor with the mattress overtop of you and theres 3 inches of water.  This was just a few hours before I was supposed to be on a plane and out of there for a week so that was kind of interesting.

14.  What do you remember about the following years:

1948= I was born in 1948.  I don't think I actually remember back that far, but that was the year i was born.
1968= That was the year I went into the service
1988= 1988.  I think the 80's were a blur.  I think all of the 80's were pretty much a blur.
1998=  Ahh, 1998.  Yeah, that's a tough one. IS THAT THE YEAR YOU GRADUATED LAURA? Laura graduated from high school in 1998.
2002= 2002, this year coming huh.  This is going to be a good year.  I'm trying to remain upbeat about it even though I'll miss the Peetage team and being on it, it'll be a good year for the team.

15.  If you could be Carl for a day, what would you do with yourself and to
others?

HAHAHA.  I think I'd probably beat up all the players, push them around a little bit, show them who's boss.

16.  For Peetage you've played the positions catcher, pitcher, 1st base, and 2nd base.  Is there anything you can't do?

PITCH. haha.  That should be obvious having pitched that I can't pitch. haha.

17.  What's up with you not filling out your online Peetage profile?  The team is very curious about what our Hall of Famer eats for his pregame meal, does for his pregame ritual, and wears boxers or briefs.....so, are you keeping this all a secret for some reason?

No.  I think it's clear that my pre-game meal was having a couple of beers and pre-game ritual was praying that I wouldn't get hurt.  What about boxers or breifs?  Boxers or breifs.  Breifs breifs.  You're not free ballin' are ya? No haha. Breifs breifs.

18.  Word association. Mention the first thing that comes to you when you
hear:

Your daughters shreeking= nothing unusual.  I'm used to it.
BANG BANG= HAHA. The gunner.  Where that came from I'll never know.  Where you guys got that I'll never know.  Not from my rocket arm that's for sure!
Machine gun Kelley= Ahh, if you have to have a nickname that's not the worst.
Craig "The whole damn show" Kelley= The whole damn show HAHA!
Peetage= More guts than brains
Ahh you guys= Ahh you guys.... blank U C K. haha!

19.  When you sell your house someday you won't be able to tell the buyers that Jimmy Moore had never been in the house.  I don't really have a question here, so just give us your thoughts.

HAHAHA. OOOOOOh boy.  Well as far as I know theres no law about full disclosure of Jimmy Moore having been in your house so until that becomes a law I'm just going to lie about that one.

20.  Did you enjoy your 20 questions Craig Kelley? (Also use this space
to say anything you want or plug your stuff/website/merchandise) (We know about the website you created, you may not be proud of it, but you should plug it anyway.)

I won't say I particularly enjoyed it, but it's been interesting.  Ahh, I have no merchandise.   If anyone would like me to autograph a glove, a bat, or a ball for 5 or 10 bucks I'd be willing to do that.  What if Tim Orow wanted you to autograph one of his cats?  (Loud laughter)


What a way to end the 20 Questions era.  It's been a great off-season and I hope my interviews helped pass the time and gave reason for a few laughs.  It just seems right that our final interview debuts on opening day. 

I was able to conduct interviews with 30 Peetage members! They were all good sports and had a lot of fun.  Interviews were not conducted with Lorne Trupiano, Mike Mies, and Scott Krimm's brother in law......but there's still time.  Please take the time to read this all-star list of players.

Interviews in order of appearance are:

Chris Mazarra
Jeff Wade
Tim Orow
Casey O'Neil
Carl Buchin
Matt Marken
Randy Dell
Jason Krimm
Jim Bradow
Mike O'Neil
Brian Prince
Philippe Burney
Bill Marken
Tim Marken
Scott Krimm
Jimmy Moore
Brad MacDonald
Anthony Ciatti
Gary Ushiro
Rachel Maroudis
Ryan Molloy
Scott Matusicky
Don Sollars
Damian Krimm
Jason Buntine
Shawn Begley
Matt Ritzler
Pat Morgan
Kyle Galan
Craig Kelley
Rewind with Philippe Burney

From October 1st to May 2nd (Spanning 8 months) the 20 Questions interview has given our fans yet another reason to visit our site every week for something new.  Hopefully  something else schpedoinkel will come along next that will give us a weekly update for the next offseason.  Thanks for your cooperation everyone.  It's been fun!  Most good things must come to an end.  It's time to say goodnight.

Matt Marken

It has been a long ride, I'd like to thank Matt for all his work putting the 20 Questions together and for harassing me every week so they were posted on time.  He has done a fine job of reporting and these have been quite funny as well.  I hope we can bring many more creative things like 20 Questions to you soon.  Thanks!

Casey O'Neil