Once there lived a powerful wizardess.  She had mastery over the elements and vast stores of magical power.  As is common with such wizards, she founded her own little kingdom, ruling over her peasants and dealing with the neighboring lands from her tower.  This wizardess did quite well for herself.  She and her court set up a well-run kingdom with little problems.

  No problems unless one counted the eccentric nature of wizards. The wizardess' court had grown accustomed to her often violent mood swings.  So when the wizardess went into the dungeon and locked herself in one of the cells, her courtisans thought little of it.

  When a moon had passed, however, with no sign of her coming out, the nobles of her lands began to worry.  It was clear she was far more unhappy then they had yet seen her.  The court discussed this predicament.  They decided that the best course of action was simply to cheer her up.  They grabbed a peasant from the fields, hosed him off, stuffed him in a tuxedo, threw some flowers in his hands and tossed him into the wizardess' cell.

  The peasant man was stunned by all the attention, but quickly understood what he was meant to do.  He sauntered up to the sulking wizardess, and smiled a gap-toothed grin.  The peasant held out the 'purdy flowerz' for the wizardess.  Seeing the bouquet, a smile creaked across the wizardess' face, and she put her arm forward... unleashing a torrent of athar's lightning, frying the peasant to a charred corpse in moments.

  Seeing the blast of magic followed by the limp and blackened body fall from the cell door, the nobles decided to try more sophisticated measures.  They hired a warrior, whose armor shined almost as brightly as his smile.  His well-manicured good looks were sure to bring joy to their lady's face.

  In full regalia, the warrior sashayed into the wizardess' cell, grinning a cheshire grin.  He sat next to the wizardess and began to speak the sweet language of love into her ears.

  The wizardess, hearing these words, started to utter some words of her own.  Soon the warrior's shiny armor reflected the mighty flames of srad as they consumed the flesh within the metal.  The nobles, smelling the unmistakable stench of burning flesh, knew the warrior had failed miserably.

  Next they tried a monk, who was a finely sculpted figure of a man.  His muscles glistened in the light, his hair slicked back and his face was very comely.  This monk assured the nobles that no female could resist his charms.

  The nobles simply opened the door and ran for cover.  The monk did a handflip into the cell, landing in front of the wizardess, flexing his muscles and singing some ballad of love.  The monk continued to flex, dance, and sing as the wizardess' eyes were fixated upon him.

  The dirt floor of the cell began to feel slippery under the monk's unshod feet.  Suddenly the earth rose up around him, surrounded him, and dragged him back into mother creag.  The monks terrified screams alerted the courtisans to his failure.

  The next day the nobles sought the help of a priest.  Surely holy council could ease whatever was troubling her mind so severely.  The priest opted to sit outside the wizardess' cell, and preach the divine word from the hall, that the holy light might reach her soul and bring to it the light.

  After a few hours of preaching, something inside the cell was stirring.  Elated, the priest called out to the wizardess, telling her to step forth from her dank prison of her mood and come into the light of reason and joy!

  Footfalls came closer to the priest, who held his arms up to the heavens and shouted huzzanahs and hallelujahs.  Being so unguarded, the Cruel Dubhahimid had little difficulty disemboweling the priest.

  The court guards were called into the dungeon to dispatch the dark minion.  Afterwards they shut the wizardess' cell door and tried to think of some new ploy.  If magic was the problem, then perhaps magic could be the solution!

  The wizard the court hired to raise their lady's mood from that dank dungeon was brimming with confidence.  Not only would this job pay well, but he would get a beautiful and powerful wizard to boot! The wizard sauntered into the wizardess' cell to collect his just rewards.

  Seeing the mage saunter in grinning a grin she had seen more than enough of in the last few days, the wizardess let loose mighty magics to smite the fool.  The wizard used his own magics to counter hers.  He soon stood before the wizardess, telling her that her man had arrived.

  The wizardess started to laugh, then.  Not a merry, joyous laugh, but a mocking cackle of a laugh.  The wizard did not care for this, and asked her what was so amusing to her.  The wizardess stopped her laugh, smiled, and let loose a mighty torrent of sal's water, washing the wizard and all the rats clean out of the dungeon.  Once more the council's attmepts to ease her suffering had failed.

  After a time, word of the wizardess'.. indisposition.. reached the neighboring lands, and armies started to mobilize to what should be an easy conquest.  The nobles were running out of time.

  So it was that when a scruffy rouge came to call to the court carrying a bundle in his arms, asking for a king's ransom to restore their lady, the nobles were more than willing to agree.  Though, they warned the rogue, far better specimens had tried. The scruffy rogue merely scoffed, and asked to be shown to the cell.

  The nobles let the rogue into the wizardess' cell, expecting another body but still hoping against hope for a miracle.  The unwashed rogue wandered into the cell, sat next to the wizardess, and told her he had something she should like to see.

  Unwrapping his bundle, the rouge tossed a human head onto the floor of the cell in front of them.  Seeing the head of her former lover, who had left her for another, the wizardess grinned wide.  She even gladly accepted Soori from the rogue to throw into the severed head.

  As the wizardess reveled in her vengeance, dancing about the head and spitting insults at it, the rogue smiled wide.  The time and money spent researching this wizardess were about to pay off very highly.  Thinking of his soon to be claimed reward, the rogue was happy that he had long ago learned what was proving to be a most valuable lesson:

Understanding the cause of a problem is the best way to know the solution.