Chapter 91
When we got to the station near our house, it seemed as if all the officers had been alerted that Kang Heewon was innocent. When Fatty saw me walk in, he tried to ignore me. I waited until he took a glance at me to see if I was looking somewhere else and when we met eye contact…
“Where’s the release form!!!”
“Kang Heewon’s over there! Take hiM!”
Fatty faked a cough and started to act as if the ceiling was interesting.
“That’s not fair!!! You can’t just back out of our bet!!!”
“You have proof little girl!?”
I should do what Jungbin would do, tear the whole place down.
“Fine, then tell me you were wrong and apologize to Heewon!”
“…officer Kim, when’s my break?”
Fatty asked looking over at the officer next to him. I could start to feel a vein pulsing pounding in my forehead, I was about to say something when Dad put his hand on my shoulder. I turned around and he pointed to a corner in the station.
...
......
There was Heewon, his face half the size it was before and paler…
Right as I saw him, I felt as if I’d stopped breathing and I stared at him for a while and slowly started nearing him…
....
......
“…it blew over you know.”
Heewon remained silent…
“…it’s all over…it didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to…”
“…I know…”
..
Heewon weakly nodded his head.
“…Kang Heewon, you know you’re a retard? ^_^.”
“…yeah…”
“…gosh, what a worry. How am I supposed to go out with a retard from now on?”
Heewon let out a smile and from the corner of his eye, a tear fell out…
…as if he were embarrassed…he quickly turned his head to face the wall…
“…thanks for trusting me…”
“…retard, did you want to go to jail that bad? …or were you trying to test me? …stupid, you could have just said it wasn’t you…”
"... ^_^"
“You’re not going to do this from now on, right?”
“…yeah…”
“Mom wants to invite you over from breakfast, let’s go.”
I carefully stuck out my hand and Heewon took it…
…I could see mom let out a small smile…
...
…and there was my loving Dad yelling at Fatty teaching him something about honesty or whatever…
…it seemed as if everything had worked out for the better…
...
+Breakfast+
“Why‘d the frosting on the cereal disappear so fast!!!”
Jaegwang yelled throwing his spoon down and sitting across the table from Heewon.
…his eyes were glaring at Heewon…
Mom carefully tried to explain to Jaegwang’s (Dad was still at the station yelling at Fatty.)
“Jaegwang, it didn’t evaporate, this cereal has no frosting. Just shut up and eat…okay?”
“Why do I have the plastic spoon! I want to use a silver spoon!!!”
That crazy little bastard, do you have to get hit?!
Jaegwang picked his spoon up and threw it near Heewon. Ignoring Jaegwang, Heewon continued to eat his cereal.
“Okay, Jungwon go get a silver spoon.”
Dammit.
I didn’t want to…but I got one anyways…
I was about to hand it to Jaegwang when he stood up abruptly from his seat.
“I can’t swallow the damn food!!!”
Jaegwang slammed the front door behind him and disappeared. A few minutes later, we were finished eating and Heewon excused himself, saying he had to get to school. The two of us leaft home with mom grinning brightly after us.
“God I’m tired!” Heewon yawned stretching.
“Well obviously, you haven’t slept for a while. Don’t go to school, go home and rest.”
“…keke, be my pillow ^0^ .”
“What? <_<.”
“Or can I use your knees as a pillow O_O .”
“What?! Go sleep on your own knees! I have to go to school! Hey you think I’ll get a certificate from the president today?! The high school girl who caught ‘The Leopard Prints’!! MWAHAHAH!”
“Can’t you smile more attractively? It’s nasty.”
“Tch, like you laugh any better.”
“Yeah I do. Look ^_^.”
“Bullsh1t.”
Right then…I saw the form of a girl getting closer…
...
…I slowed my pace and I felt Heewon push past me and ran happily towards the figure.
“NUNA!”
Chapter 92
As if the events from last night didn’t phase her at all Seohyun unnie smiled brightly at Heewon.
…as if nothing was wrong…like every other time…
I watched Heewon acting like a retard in front of Seohyun unnie, and it was almost embarrassing to know him.
“Nuna! I heard that you were some mob boss!”
“How you doing, kiddo?”
“Good, how about you? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine! Jungwon, how are you!”
.....
“G-good!!”
“…why are you stuttering? Jungbin was worried about you, you’re so lucky you’re popular ^_^.”
“…popular…-_-…”
Seohyun unnie raised her two arms and started patting Heewon on the shoulders.
“Be good from now on! You lie like that again and I’ll beat you.”
“Of course I won’t. I know what love is now, nuna. So I think I have a reason to live now. ^_^.”
.....
…don’t say what you’re about to say, retard…
He looked over and me and then back at Seohyun unnie and grinned.
..
Seohyun unnie pat his head with a big grin…not one of sadness…
She is such a cool, mature young woman…
“What’s love? ^_^.”
“…love? …you’re asking what love is?”
“Yeah.”
“…love is me and Jungwon! Hahahaha!!!”
<_<..
...
.....
I haven’t heard Heewon talk like this in forever…
I haven’t seen Heewon talk like this in forever…
…he’s finally the Heewon I knew…
The way he was in middle school: bright. Heewon, who always had a happy spell on him…
…I’m glad he can smile like he used to…
I’m so relieved…
“Oh right Jungwon, Eungyu’s leaving in a few days…”
...
I numbly nodded my head…
“The girls at his school were bawling and nagging him, so he’s gonna have his last stage here in the auditorium. It’s his last performance here, he’s amazing. ^_^.”
“…yeah, he is…”
“I’m playing the drums for him. You’re going to come right…?”
“…of course ^_^.”
...
He’s past now…
Eungyu’s in the past…
“You know, I’ve always liked bread more than flowers…”
“Haha! I’ll buy a load!!!”
“^_^ , you’re too cute.”
With her large hand, Seohyun unnie gave me a noogie. Whenever I’m next to her, I get the feeling that I’m really young, like a little kid.”
“Kang Heewon, you play the bass.”
....
.......
What’s she aiming for…
Doesn’t she know how Eungyu and Heewon are now…?
Why is she telling Heewon to play the bass…?
“I know.”
Heewon said nodding.
“We have to have you and Eungyu have a happy ending. You know that nuna likes a happy ending right?”
“…yeah.”
“That’s good. ^_^. Jungwon, I’ll be going, and call often. I’ll see you at the auditorium!”
“…okay.”
She took Heewon’s hand, then mine and left after putting them together…
...
When Seohyun unnie was nothing but a small dot, Heewon and I finally started walking…
“…poor Seohyun unnie…”
“Why?”
“Unnie likes happy endings…”
“Who doesn’t?”
“…Seohyun unnie is so much better than me isn’t she…”
“Duh.”
“…go tell that to Seohyun unnie. Tell her that you think she’s a 100,000 better than Yoon Jungwon.”
I felt Heewon wrap his arm around my neck.
“AHK! What are you doing!”
“You’re jealous!! Aren’t you!”
“Crazy bastard, it’s not that! Anyways, go tell that to Seohyun unnie!”
“You know you’re jealous!”
“It’s not that!”
You’re even denser than Shin Eungyu…but I can’t say anything, because I’m dense too…
That day at school, all my friends were shooting me with their eyes and right when school ended, I sped out to where Heewon was waiting outside. He kept nagging that he wanted something to eat, but I eventually got out of it.
“Oh right! Let’s go call Eungyu and Nari!”
“…what?”
“Well, I have to practice later with the later and let’s all make things better!”
I think something in his head broke while he was in that cell… <_<
“N-not right now!”
“Why not! It’s great!”
..
....
Heewon pulled out his cell phone and I tried to take it away grabbing onto his hand and arm.
5 minutes passed and I was wanting to break Heewon’s long ugly fingers that were waiting for Eungyu to pick up.
“Eungyu? Yo! It’s me Heewon!”
God…
He’s gone mad in that jail cell!!!
Chapter 93
“Come on! Let’s hang out!”
Do you know how high the wall that you’ve built up is? Do you think you could break down that wall by ‘hanging out’?
I just scratched my head.
“…your house? Why? You can’t come out? Oh your nuna, okay, then I’ll go! Jungwon and I’ll be there soon!”
Not bothering to hear what Eungyu’s answer was, Heewon closed his phone and put it into his pocket.
“…what’d Eungyu say <_<.”
“He said to come over. ^_^. Want to go buy some pizza? Or should be buy chicken? Sohyun nuna’s allergic to chicken so let’s buy pizza!”
“…hey…Heewon.”
“Yeah?”
“Truthfully…I can’t look at Eungyu for ten minutes without crying. Things come out of here. ^_^.” I said pointing to my eyes.
Heewon took my hand.
“Let’s go.”
“…”
We walked to go get pizza and stood me outside to wait while he paid for it. A few minutes later, he stepped out grinning like a mad man with two large boxes of pizza and a bottle of coke.
“Can you smell it? Smell! Smell it! Want to eat a slice?”
“Nah. You eat yourself.”
And that’s what he did. He placed the coke in my hand and opened one of the boxes and after determining which slice was the biggest, took a large mouthwatering bite. On the way to Eungyu’s house, he continued to eat the slice.
He wasn’t like this a week ago…it makes me happy.
No wait, I want to believe that I’m happy…
But the second we stopped in front of Eungyu’s house, I froze. Heewon wiped his greasy hand on my arm and rang the doorbell.
“Who is it?” Sohyun unnie asked weakly.
“It’s Heewon!”
“…okay…”
The front gate opened and he stepped in before me. I paused before I stepped in and when I gathered my nerve to walk in, I could see Sohyun unnie grinning at Heewon.
“Jung-Jungwon!”
“…hi.”
She quickly turned around and ran into the house. What the hell was that?
I’ll never understand her. Anyways, I walked into the house after Heewon.
....
In the living room, I saw Eungyu laying down on the couch and next to him was Nari.
“Oh! Heewon oppa! Jungwon unnie!”
Eungyu slowly turned to us and I found myself looking away from him.
“…hey.” Eungyu said in a quiet voice so quiet that I could barely hear.
“Yo! I bought some pizza!” Heewon’s voice sounded at least ten times louder compared to Eungyus.
…the two have changed…it used to be Eungyu who was loud and Heewon who was quiet…
He plopped himself down on the floor and opened the pizza box. Awkwardly, I turned to Nari and smiled at her.
“ ^0^ .”
“ <_<.”
“Shin Eungyu, long time no see. ^_^.”
....
....
Heewon said brightly, taking another slice of pizza and Eungyu just nodded quietly, not making a sound. Maybe it was because of Darky, but he looked as if he’d eaten barely anything. His face was skinnier and all he did was smile softly…
I could feel my heart start to hurt and I quickly looked somewhere else.
“God! How many rations have you starved you bastard? Hey, eat this.”
Heewon shoved a slice into Eungyu’s face and I tried ignoring Nari’s glares towards my back. I excused myself to go look for Sohyun unnie.
+Knock Knock+
Unnie opened the door and poked her head out.
“Unnie, it’s Jungwon.”
“…huh?! J-Jungwon, I’m really sick.”
“Where!? Do you want me to call Jaegwang for you?!”
“NO!!!!”
“Then…go to the hospital!”
“Leave unnie alone!!!”
....
Sohyun unnie yelled and slammed the door. She doesn’t act sick… <_<
“…get better, unnie.”
I was about to turn around and walk back to the living room when…
“Meow….rawr~~~”
I froze.
..
What the…
“Pupu?”
“Meow! Meow!”
“Pupu!”
“Me~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ow!”
This is Pupu!
It’s Jaegawng’s treasure…-_- it’s Pupu.
“Unnie…is the cat in there Pupu?!”
“No! It’s MY cat!”
Unnie yelled defensively.
“Really? Unnie, did you find that cat outside?”
“No!!! TT_TT !!! My daddy bought it for me! It’s Siamese! My cat’s beige and it doesn’t steal tomatoes like Pupu!”
....
…no it’s not, it’s Pupu. <_<
“…how’d you know Pupu likes tomatoes?”
“…I-it’s just a…my cat’s a Siamese cat!!! He’s my cat!”
Sohyun unnie started wailing. She was too pure to lie… -_-
+Sohyun unnie’s Room+
“Jungwon, don’t tell Jaegwang. Just tell him I found him somewhere.”
“Okay…okay…I won’t.”
This is what happened.
Sohyun unnie was jealous of all the love Jaegwang gave to Pupu, so she snuck Pupu out with my mom’s help.
-_-..
…and she’s been taking care of him this whole time…
Well, that explains all the scratch marks on her face, she’s still pretty though. With Pupu in my arms (she‘s starting to warm up to the cat), I left unnie’s room after reassuring her that I wouldn’t tell Jaegwang for the 50th. I was walking back towards the living room when…
“Ahk! Are you okay?! Are you okay!?”
I started yelling as I heard Nari making a large fuss.
It seemed as if Eungyu had cut his finger while opening the coke bottle and I ran over to Eungyu who had on a teary face.
“You dummy!! You should have been careful! Do you know how unhealthy it is to bleed when you’re not feeling too well?!”
I set Pupu on the ground and I put pressure on his finger using the sleeve of my hand.
...
…when his cut had stopped bleeding, I noticed everyone was starting at me and I quickly backed away from Eungyu.
“God, I hate blood so much. Haha, I always overreact when I see blood… -_-.”
I faked two coughs and Eungyu put his finger in his mouth while staring at the sleeve of my shirt.
...
“…there’s blood on your shirt.”
“Haha…would you look at that…”
....
…another awkward silence filled the room except Pupu’s purring.
“I’m going to go for a smoke ^_^.”
Heewon said, taking out a cigarette from his pocket. Eungyu nodded, his finger still in his pocket.
“Go…after him…”
Eungyu said quietly…
“Put pointment on your finger.”
“…yeah.”
Eungyu…Eungyu…
How much time has to go by before I’ll be able to look at you without crying? It’s only been a second and my eyes are already watering up…
...
“…I’ll be right back.”
For around 10 seconds, silence continued…
...
....
I got up from my seat and started to get up from my seat.
“Wait.”
...
.....
Eungyu said…his voice growing softer…
Chapter 94
“…wait.”
...
.....
I froze at Eungyu’s quiet voice, I heard Nari run out of the house.
…afraid that he’d see the tears in my eyes…I looked down at my feet as calmly as I could…
“Go after Nari…”
“…it might be the last time we’ll be able to talk standing at this distance from each other…I take it back…stay here…”
It’s the last time we’ll be able to talk like this…?
I thought I’d forgotten him for the most part…but why does it hurt so much…?
Why does it hurt so much hearing these words come from him…?
I swallowed back my tears…
“You d-dummy!!! Why’s it the last? Are you going to act as if you don’t know me and the others when you become a singer?! You’re mean aren’t you?!”
“…not any meaner than you are… ^_^.”
He said smiling, but I felt that if I stayed any longer that end up crying so I ran up the stairs as fast as I could to the attic top.
I stopped before I opened the door and wiped away my tears. I grabbed for the handle and opened the door. The first thing I saw was Heewon’s back. In the chair eungyu always used to sit in was Heewon…
…in Eungyu’s seat…
He turned around and threw his cigarette on the ground; I just stood by the door and Heewon walked over to me slowly.
“…are you done smoking?”
I asked, raising my voice a tone higher and trying to act tough I raised my hand on his shoulder.
“Yeah, that’s your house right?” He asked pointing to the house next door which was mine.
“Yeah ^_^.”
“I can see all your laundry hanging outside to dry. Is that your underwear?”
“AHK!”
I quickly jumped on him to cover his eyes, I hadn’t even thought of that possibility. Wait…then that means that Eungyu would have seen it all the time!!!
No!!!
Why does mom always do this to me?!
With his eyes still closed Heewon opened his mouth to speak.
“Hey…I won’t look…take your hands off.”
“Hell no!”
“I said I won’t look. >_< .”
“No!”
.....
He took off my hands quickly and turned around. Grinning at me, he grabbed my shoulders.
"........."
“Jungwon!”
“What? TT_TT…”
“Don’t hit me, okay?”
“Why would I hit you?”
Heewon lowered his head and still holding my shoulders kissed me. What the hell just happened?
I was trying to push him away with all my strength when I heard the door squeak open and when I turned my head quickly, I saw the top of Eungyu’s head disappearing.
Dammit.
I felt the strength in my legs leave me and I collapsed to the ground. Heewon rolled his eyes and pulled me up.
“You know how dirty the ground is? What? You’re so happy you’re shaking?”
“…you told me not to hit you earlier right?”
“Yeah, why are you going to hit me?”
“Yes I am, you bastard!”
With my hands into two balled fists I started hitting the bastard as hard as I could. I don’t know what he was so happy about but Heewon just continued to laugh.
When I looked down the side, I could see Eungyu running away…Heewon’s smile slowly faded away…
“Did Eungyu…see…?”
“Yeah, he did you retard.”
“…”
He covered his face with his hands and quickly ran down the stairs.
...
I just shook my head and picked up Pupu who wouldn’t leave me alone back home. I walked home and went up to my room, blank.
…why am I not feeling anything…?
And what about Eungyu?!
What do I do about Eungyu?!
…crap!!!
…damn!!!
How much longer do I have to do this…?
How much longer do I have to be like this…?
My heart and my head are doing different things…why? I’m not actor. I’m just a regular high school girl who should cry when she wants and smiles when she smiles. Do I have to go on acting the rest of my life?! Is that is?!
God! Someone answer me!!!
How much longer do I have to go on acting?!
When will this finally end…is there even an end…?
“Mom! I think the pig is crazy!”
Jaegwang yelled opening the door to my room and yelling downstairs.
...
“Get out!!! Please, just get the hell out!!!”
“Huh? Is this Pupu?!?! A-a-are you…are you…you’re you-you’re…”
Rubbing his eyes, Jaegawng slowly and cautiously walked towards Pupu.
“Meow.”
With a small meow, Pupu got up and went over to Jaegwang.
“PUPU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TT0TT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“Get the hell out, Yoon Jaegwang!!!”
“PUPU!!!!!!!!!!!!! TT0TT !!!!!!!!!! PUPU WHERE YOU?!?!??! PUPU!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“Get out! Just please get the hell out! I want to be alone!!!”
All night…Jaegwang ran around the house screaming Pupu’s name.
All night…I looked at the ceiling begging to hear an answer…
...
....
Two days passed…
Eungyu had already left…
…now…the house next door would have no meaning
6...
…at Ahnhyun’s auditorium…
Was opened up for Eungyu’s last stage…
Heewon took my hand…
...
…and the two of us left to see Eungyu for the last time…
Chapter 95
The closer we got to school the harder I squeezed Heewon’s hand. I bit my lip when I saw the sign that said Ahnhyun High School…
“Ow!”
“What?”
“Nothing…TT_TT…”
Even a hundred feet away, I could hear screams and yells as Seohyun unnie played her drums.
“Did it start already!?”
Heewon ran ahead towards the back of the auditorium carrying his bass.
“AHHHH!”
I felt my feet walk a little closer towards the place where Eungyu was..
…where Eungyu would be singing…
I pushed my way towards the front, on the way towards the front I realized there were about 200 kids there, 80% were girls…
As Eungyu waved his hands to the crowd the girls started screaming even louder. He gave a pretty grin to all the girls and disappeared behind the curtains.
"-_-"
When I looked behind me, I saw Hyungpal and Jungbin’s sister Miyun glaring at me. I quickly turned my head.
“What the hell is she doing here…?” I could hear Jung Miyun muttering to Hyungpal.
“Motorcycle take-away-er… <_<.”
“Hey you bastard! I heard you got it back!”
“Why are you yelling at my Hyungpal!”
“…wait…are you two going out?”
Hyungpal faked a cough and turned his head.
“Yeah we are!!! What are you going to do about it!”
“…that’s nice…hope you guys last long.”
“Why are you using that tone? Are you laughing at us?!”
“No~ Who said I was? Gosh, chill out.”
“Do I look pathetic to you cause I’m going out with a guy who looks like him?! Yeah, my eyes are retarded like my brother!!!!”
Jung <iyun yelled pointing at Hyungpal’s head. I could see him starting to pissed off and with a turn of his foot, he walked out the auditorium.
…I saw tears in his eyes… <_<
“God! Nothing works out when you’re around!” Jungbin’s sister yelled running after Hyungpal.
Right then…
The curtains spread open and the lights all rested on the middle of the stage. Immediately, the muttering because screams…
…he’s at his best when he’s singing…it’s always been that way…
With his electric guitar around him, Eungyu stood in front of the mike and waved his hand embarrassedly.
On the left side of the stage, Nari was smiling behind her keyboard…Nari was always next to Eungyu. Near the back, behind Eungyu was my love Seohyun unnie with a hat on her head.
…and next to her was Heewon…my boyfriend…
As if he were looking for someone, Heewon looked around the crowd only to be startled by Seohyun unnie’s drums. For a second he glared over at her for startling him.
“Hehe, hey, who’s that? He’s really cute.”
“He’s Kang Heewon, didn’t you know?”
I could hear the girls behind me muttering and giggling about him.
And…
“I’m going to send every one of you people home crying today!!!”
Was Eungyu’s first greeting to the crowd.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
The girls went crazy, I could see Nari’s start to frown.
“Shin Eungyu!!! Shin Eungyu!!! Shin Eungyu!!!”
As if they’d all promised each other, Eungyu’s name filled the auditorium and I turned around to look at the girls. Some even had tears in their eyes…
…and with a fancy drum intro from Seohyun unnie, their first song started.
After looking around for me the whole time, Heewon grinned as he spotted me and started playing his bass, swaying his head slightly.
I’m selfish~~~ And I’m a fraidy cat~~~
I hate doing this that I need to think about~~~ I know I’m going to be this way all my life~~
I know that as I grow older~~~ I’ll get even worse at it~~~
But I can’t fix myself~~
It was this way before~~~ And it’ll be that way~~~
I know it’s stupid~~~ But all the people I know are like that~~~
His songs always had weird lyrics…
I couldn’t tell where he was looking as he singing…
…he wasn’t looking at the crowd…
…but he wasn’t looking at the door either…
…he’s not looking at his mike either…
I know he’s looking somewhere…but I don’t know where…
I could just reach for him, he’s this close to me…but for some reason he seemed miles away…
Last…this is our last…
That word kept circling my mind and I couldn’t see Eungyu clearly because that word kept fogging up my head…
Rubbing eyes, I looked back up, but they still wouldn’t clear up…Eungyu’s so far away…he’s so far away…
“Oppa!!! Don’t go!!!”
“Eungyu, don’t go! I’ll buy you a lot of water balloons!!!”
“If you leave, there won’t be any other reason to keep going to school!”
“Oppa don’t go!”
<_<
…was he this popular…?
…I didn’t know…
....
.....
About an hour passed, and in that hour 8 songs had passed…
All eight of the songs were exhilarating and full of life…
...
…after finishing the eighth song, Eungyu took his mike quietly.
“…here‘s out last for the night…” He panted heavily into the mike.
…last…?
....
….I know…
…it’s the last….
Heewon flashed me a peace sign and grinned at me.
My eyes were looking at Heewon, but my ears were listening to Eungyu…
“This is our last song…this songs a little different, a ballad…it’s called…”
....
....
Chapter 96
“This is our last song…this songs a little different, a ballad…it’s called…”
....
.....
“Pupu’s Kidnapping!!!”
A small wave of laughter filled the auditorium and I found myself laughing softly with the others. Ignoring all the laughter, Eungyu grabbed the mike with a sincere and sad expression on his face.
‘Pupu’s Kidnapping’
What would I have done if Jaegwang was here…
Eungyu turned around and nodded over to Nari, where she opened up the song with her intro…
…it’s true…
…it was a ballad…
A sad melody echoed inside the auditorium and soon after, Eungyu’s clear voice…
A cat we snuck home~~~ An ugly little cat~~~
A cat that steals and eats tomatoes~~~
Every night he sits on the windowsill and sadly looks over at the house next door~~~
Send me back~~~ Please send me back~~~
I thought this was the end of my crying~~~
With Pupu’s soft crying~~~ I feel myself crying with him~~~
....
......
..........
Retard…why are you crying…?
It’s a song…it’s only a song…
The lyrics are funny…he’s calling Pupu ugly, and he is…
What’s so sad about the lyrics…? Why am I crying…
..
Heewon stopped playing right then, he put his bass down and looked over at Eungyu. The audience was as quiet as a mouse…nothing could be heard except their soft breathing…
The drums and the keyboard got quieter and quieter…along with them…Eungyu’s voice got quieter and quieter…
An fat and ugly cat~~~
A skinny and good-looking guy~~~
Send us to Her~~~
Please let us be next to Her~~~
I wave bye to the moon today like every other day~~~
I wave a tearful farewell with the moon~~~
Watch over Her tonight~~~
I really thought this was the end of my tears~~~
But because of Pupu’s sobbing I-
Eungyu dropped the mike in his hands. The playing stopped and there was a mutter going around in the crowds…
Eungyu covered his eyes with his hand.
What’s wrong…Eungyu…
…what’s wrong…
Don’t do that you dummy…
…stop it…
....
......
For a while, Eungyu remained like that…covering his eyes…
“…I’m sorry…my voice won’t come out…I’m sorry…I really can’t sing…my voice won’t come out…”
....
Some of the people in the audience started crying along with Eungyu even when they didn’t know the reason why Eungyu was crying. They just cried with him because he was crying…
“Don’t cry…Eungyu…don’t cry…”
“Oppa!! Don’t cry!!!”
I turned my back on the stage and stared at the back door of the auditorium, tears streaming down my cheeks…
Even after 30 minutes…the crying and sobbing inside the auditorium didn’t stop…
Gathering my courage, I turned back around towards the stage and I saw Eungyu looking down at me, his guitar still around him.
“…bye…”
He said forcing his voice to be bright, he smiled at me brightly…
…in a sudden movement, he jumped off the stage…
…
…
Everyone’s eyes were one me and him…
...
....
…the sound of a bass spilled the auditorium almost suddenly when Heewon picked up his bass and started playing…
…that’s not what I was expecting…
…after him, Nari started playing her keyboard…
Surprised, I looked up at the stage and I saw that Seohyun unnie had thrown off her hat and was smiling sadly.
...
“…here…”
...?..
Eungyu took off the guitar he had on around him and put it over my head and rested it on my shoulder…
I saw on the end of his guitar was The necklace…
.....
Eungyu lowered his head and turned his head slightly towards the stage…
“…Heewon…I’m going to hug Jungwon…”
...
...
Instead of answering, Heewon sent him an okay sign…
...
It was then when Eungyu finally smiled, he blinked back a few tears and wiped them away with a bright smile on his face.
...
....
He held my two shoulders and brought me closer to him…
...
All the muttering…the whispering inside the auditorium didn’t matter to me…
....
…afraid that this really was the last, I let him hold me tighter…
…my heart’s beating…
…I can feel Eungyu’s heart beating…
…I can feel Eungyu’s sad tears…
…and I can feel Eungyu’s sad breathing…
We love each other so much…
I love enough him so much it hurts…
…but how can this be our last…?
...
I buried my face into his shoulder, crying….
“…Jungwon…”
“……”
“Answer me…I can’t say anything if you don’t answer…”
“…yeah…?”
...
....
........
“…I’m sorry for loving you…”
“……”
...
......
It was your first time saying that…do you know?
It was the first time you told me that you loved me…you told me for the first time…
…I stepped back from him, and Heewon and Nari’s playing stopped.
“…let’s not…do anything like love…from now on…”
That’s how I responded to him. Eungyu weakly nodded his head and reached up to unclasp the necklace around his neck.
The necklace that was covered by his sweater was revealed, the necklace with the girl…
....
........
“This is Jungwon, and the one you have is Eungyu. Always have them together. Have them kiss more than 10 times a day…and take them to a lot of fun places… You have to take them to the beach…Jungwon wanted to go there really bad, you know… ^_^…”
...
“…have them get married, and make sure they eat a lot of good food…have them share the same blanket when they go to sleep and make sure that he hug each other when they go to sleep… Oh! And have Jungwon wait outside every night so that Eungyu doesn’t go cheating on her…promise me…”
...
...
“…I promise…”
He hooked pinkies and Eungyu pressed the necklace in his hand into my mine.
“That’s good then, Eungyu and Jungwon will live happily now…right?”
Eungyu said, whispering into my ear. I covered my mouth and nodded, the tears still falling…
He smiled at me and pat my head…
…I could see him getting further and further away…
He walked further and further away towards the door, the crowd parting the way for him…
The large door opened for a second and Eungyu paused…then disappeared…
An empty auditorium…
...
…I brought the two dolls up to my face and fell to the ground…
I was sobbing and Nari chased after Eungyu…
.....
......
“What do I do…Eungyu’s gone…Eungyu left…he’s really gone…What do I do…I don’t think I can go on…what do I do…Heewon…Heewon…let me go…let me go to Eungyu, please…Heewon, help me…I want to breathe, I want to smile…”
I started wailing like a small child.
Heewon jumped off the stage and looked down at me and with a small sigh, he hugged me tightly…
Chapter 97
Heewon was crying also…
As my wailing and crying got louder, he hugged me even tighter…
Because I kept imagining Eungyu walking further and further away from the school…
Because I kept imagining Eungyu, who smiled until the end…
…I wanted to beg to Heewon to let me go after him…but like Eungyu, I couldn’t get my voice out…
This is what Eungyu felt when he couldn’t talk…
I want to ask when the end will be…when everything will be happy…
Right then…
Seohyun unnie got up from her seat and walked over to Nari’s keyboard…
Fa…Sol…Re…Do…Mi…So…
She started pushing any random keys.
......
........
“…this is what you to are right now…you’re both twisted and tangled in this mess…Heewon, when you’re with Jungwon, this is the only type of music that comes out…”
Heewon’s arms slowly grew limp and I just stared at unnie…
“…but when Jungwon’s with Eungyu…”
Do…Re…Mi…Fa…So…La…Ti…Do…
Unnie slowly pressed each key in order…
“Heewon, do you hear this? This is how it should sound. Just let her go.”
...
......
Heewon slowly stood up and turned to face the stage.
“…I can’t do anything without her…what do you think I feel? You think I’m happy about this?”
“Do you know how pathetic you are? You’re being selfish, you’re breaking apart two people so that you can be happy. Jungwon, stand up. Go after Eungyu.”
I flinched hearing his name come out of Seohyun unnie’s mouth.
“Hurry and go.”
...
.....
I took off the guitar and looked over at Heewon.
…his eyes were saying…’don’t go…please…don’t go…’
“God dammit! Go before Eungyu disappears!!!” Seohyun unnie yelled.
I closed my eyes.
I turned my back on Heewon and I was about to take a step towards the door.
“…please…I’m begging you…”
..
“Kang Heewon…what are you really trying to hold onto? Love or sympathy…?”
Seohyun unnie asked walking up to Heewon, her voice shaking angrily.
“…both.”
“…what if she dies. What if Jungwon dies.”
“…I’ll keep her alive.”
“BUT YOU CAN’T!!!!”
Her yell filled the auditorium…
“Just a little longer…I want to be able to smile a little longer…It was the first time I’ve been able to smile so much…it was the first time I’ve waited for a new day…I know I’m selfish…but I don’t want to go back…I don’t think I can…”
Seohyun unnie sighed and looked up at the ceiling, it looked as if she were trying not to cry. I just numbly played with the necklace hanging off the guitar.
“…then promise me…Kang Heewon…promise me that the day you become happy is the day you’ll let Jungwon go for her turn…”
"......."
“When one of your parents either your mom or dad comes back to you…then you’ll be able to be happy without Jungwon…then let Jungwon go back to Eungyu.”
"........."
“Promise right here and now. Stop crying and tell me that you promise. It’ll be Eungyu and Jungwon’s turn to be happy…promise.”
For a while, Heewon just stared at Seohyun unnie and he slowly lowered his head and nodded. With a small smile on her face, she pat his shoulder. And after putting an arm around my shoulder she loudly yelled…
“Let’s go! I’m starved, I’ll buy!!!”
With the guitar in hand, I forced a smile.
Even smiling is exhausting…
A few people still remaining outside glared at me as I stepped out…
Morning…
Seohyun unnie helped me drag my drunk body all the way home.
“Unnie…can you help me forget Eungyu? Please? Anything’s fine, anything is fine so just help me please? I’m tired of crying, I don’t want to cry anymore…help me forget him.”
“Dude, don’t talk like that, it’s scaring me.”
A guy’s voice said…oh…it’s Jaegwang. He took me from Seohyun unnie.
“Seohyun unnie…”
“She’s gone, what’s wrong? Did Eungyu hyung dump you? Want me to go beat him up for you!?”
“Beat up who? You’re not going to beat up anyone. Do you know how important it is to hold onto someone you love?! HUH!? DO YOU KNOW?!”
“Yeah! I do!”
“You do? Haha! Don’t make me laugh! You have Pupu and you have Sohyun unnie!!! You don’t know anything…I’m pathetic…so you better go on calling me nuna from now you…got that?!”
I closed my eyes and tried to bring up Eungyu’s face…
I’ll just cry today, only today…
“I know…I know too well…Sohyun’s not mine anymore either…good night nuna…”
I could hear Jaegwang’s sad voice say after me…
....
I was about to call after him, but he closed the door behind him…
5 months later, morning.
Ignoring all of my mom’s yelling, I swallowed all the soup she’d made me.
“I think I’m going to barf!”
I quickly ran to the bathroom, ignoring my mom and dad’s glaring at me.
“You stupid girl, that’s why you don’t drink until you pass out!!!”
I could hear my mom yelling at me from outside the door.
“Mom! I know, nuna barfed all over the attic top yesterday!!!”
<_<
Oh right, Yoon Jaegwang is finally a 3rd year in high school.
As I walked out of the bathroom, I felt my mom beating down on my back.
“Ow! That hurts!!!”
“Get lost, go to school!!!”
“I don’t have any classes in the morning! Pupu always pees on the floor, but why don’t you hit her?!”
“Are you a cat?!?! Are you?! Do you want me to treat you like a cat?!?!”
I walked into the living room where I saw Jaegwang.
“You’re a 3rd year, why aren’t you ever at your volunteering somewhere?!”
“Did YOU ever volunteer?!”
“You’re always meeting Miyae!!! Mom! Jaegwang always lies and says he’s volunteering when truthfully all he does is meets girls!!!”
“Fawk, I’m going to kill you.”
He slammed the door behind him and disappeared, and with a look that could kill, mom chased after him out the door.
Hahahaha!
..
...
Well, there’s nothing to do for me, and classes don’t start for me until a little later, should I go over to Heewon’s?
Around 2 months ago, he’d always stopped me from going to him house even when I wanted to. He might have bought a whole roomful of cookies and he wants to eat them all. <_<
With a thick jacket around me, I decided to head over to his house. I waved for a taxi and I smiled as I finally reached Heewon’s house.
It’s been two months >_<
I fingered two tangerines that he’s always liked to eat and was about to turn into his neighborhood when…
...
I heard the familiar voice of a middle-aged woman…I stopped in my tracks…
...
“My son is so pretty!!! Always walking me out to my car!”
“Come home early, I’m going to come home early today too.”
....
.....
I dropped the tangerines on the ground…
…and the only thing I could do was smile…
“…Yoon Jungwon…” Heewon said, his face freezing.
“Jungwon? Wow! I haven’t seen you in so long!!!”
Heewon’s mom walked closer over to me…
...
“Were you scared? Where you that scared? Is that why you kept this from me?”
"............"
“…this is why you didn’t let me come over huh…? Kang Heewon…I can’t believe you…^_^….”
Heewon’s mom looked confusedly at Heewon and me. I turned around, and accident stepped on a tangerine on the ground. I ran out the neighborhood…
“Yoon Jungwon!!”
I ignored him and ran as fast as I could…and all I could feel was happiness…
…I’m crazy…
Bringing up Eungyu in a small section inside my head, I burst into happy tears and laughter…
…can I go now?
…I can go now right…?
Chapter 98
I don’t even know how much I tried all this time. I hated how the only thing I could think of was you when I was sitting by myself…or how I kept hearing your voice for no reason…
I hated that…
...
It hurt me…
So I found ways to keep myself busy…I was always busy. That’s why I had no to time to rest. Five months, I kept you inside my head, and in those five months I thought my head was going to burst.
The rope I felt was holding me down was finally cut…
…I can see Eungyu…I can touch Eungyu…I can smile next to Eungyu…
The promise between Seohyun unnie and Heewon could finally be put into place now…
I ran over to Jaegawng school fearlessly…looking around desperately for Nari. I was dressed in regular clothing and as I walked inside the school, I could see people staring at me.
..
In order from 1 to 12 in the third year classrooms. Everytime I opened a room 40 something heads would all turn over to me.
…damn…she’s not in here either…
Class 2... Class 3... I opened ever door in order…
Ever since I’d seen Heewon’s mom…my adrenaline was pumping through my veins…
This time…I opened class 4.
As soon as I opened the door, I saw a balding man, jump suddenly and drop the stick he was hitting a student with. When I looked down at the student getting hit…
“Nuna!!!”
There was my brother Jaegwang, rubbing his ass.
“…Yoon Jaegwang! Where’s Shin Nari?!”
“…she’s in this class…what are you doing here?”
.....
......
“What great timing, do you happen to be Yoon Jaegwang’s nuna? <_<.” Baldy asked, nearing towards me.
“…Shin Nari! Where’s Eungyu at?!”
ㅇ_ㅇ....ㅇ_ㅇ......ㅇ_ㅇ.......
Nari slowly rose from her seat and looked up at me….
“Why.”
“Where is he?! Where in Seoul is he?!”
“…why do you want to know where oppa is…” Her voice became colder…
“I don’t see why I have to tell you. Where is Eungyu.”
“…I don’t see why I have to tell you either…”
I could feel the adrenaline slowing to a stop…
“Hey! Shin Nari! Are you talking back to my nuna!!?!”
Jaegwang yelled, still on the ground.
“Explain to me what you’re doing here!” Baldy yelled walking towards me.
“…fine…you’re not going to tell me…?”
“No, I’m not.”
“…forget it…there are more people I can ask.”
I turned my back on her and started to walk out the class when her voice stopped me.
“…oppa’s back to how he should be…stop it…don’t bother him anymore…”
....
.......
I walked out the school, fingering my treasured one dollar bill and the two couple necklaces, and the knife.
I’m bothering him…? Eungyu…am I?
I smiled to myself and went to go over to Seohyun unnie’s house. With her hair all messed, she greeted my cheerily.
“Man, it’s early.”
“Unnie, you know that promise? Heewon has to keep it right? I’m not doing anything wrong right?”
“…what are you saying?” Seohyun unnie asked, her drowsiness disappearing.
“Heewon’s mom is back, I can go to Eungyu now, right unnie?”
“Of course ^_^.”
.....
.........
Okay…
…this is all I need…
Unnie handed me a scrap piece of paper with Eungyu’s address.
“I’m so nervous, I am so nervous.”
“Just ask Eungyu to hold you, then you won’t be nervous anymore kiddo. ^0^ .”
I felt thankful to unnie for saying Eungyu’s name.
Suwon…? Suwon…?
I stared at the piece of paper in my hand and blinked a couple of times…
“Eungyu’s not in Seoul.” Unnie said calmly…
“…but you said he was training in Seoul…”
That was all a lie…
That whole thing about debuting as a singer was a lie…
He said he didn’t have enough courage to see you…
That’s why he left by himself…
He graduated from high school over there…
…and he goes to college over there also…I met him a little while ago..
He said he was happy…but I could see right through him…I’ve known him too long to fall for something like that…
I felt so bad looking at him force a smile that I couldn’t bring myself to say anything to him…
.....
…I feel numb…
I felt hateful towards the human named, Yoon Jungwon…
With everything that Seohyun unnie told me made myself feel stupider and stupider. I looked out the window of the bus at the scenery.
The place where Eungyu lives…
…the place where Eungyu moved to, to give everything up…
I took out the necklaces and stared at Eungyu and Jungwon…
…I took them to the beach like you told me to…
…I made them kiss at least 20 times a day like you told me to…
…I made them share a blanket at night like you told me to…
…I made sure they were together all day like you told me too…
A tear fell on their faces…
Now…we’ll be able to smile and cry together…we‘ll be able to be together all day…
I brought out the piece of paper Seohyun unnie had given me and realized I’d missed my stop.
“Let me off!!!!”
The bus stopped with a squeal and as soon as I got off, I grabbed a person every minute to ask for directions.
“Excuse me, could you tell me where this is?”
“Oh, just go straight up.”
“Thank you!”
Because of my nervousness, I felt myself walking like an idiot…
Even the day before Christmas…
Even the day before a picnic…
Even the day before a meeting…
I never was this nervous…
This was the first time in my life I was so nervous, I can finally hug Eungyu. I can hold his hand and I can be with him for a 100 days…200 days…and like my stupid friends, I can hold 100 day parties…200 day parties!!!
10 minutes passed and I found myself in front of an apartment building.
...
Even when I was standing still, my hands were shaking like mad, I felt as if my heart was already inside his house, but I can’t make my stupid feet move…
I quickly ran to a store and bought a bottle of soju. I’m crazy, even after going through all that trouble this morning.
I walked step after step up the stairs…his house was the first house on the second floor…
I froze in front of the door and I reached for the doorbell…and then I quickly took my hand away…I reached for it again…and snatched it away once again…
I think I did that at least a hundred times…
Screw it!!!
I unscrewed the top of the soju and drank up at least 2/3 of the bottle.
10 minutes later, I felt some of my nerve coming back (thank God I get drunk easily)
“Eungyu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
-_-.....
I pushed the doorbell with my head a few times….
+Ding Dong! Ding Dong!+
No wait! Hold on, I’m not ready yet!!!
…but the person who opened the door was a young woman with her shoulder length hair tied in a small scrunchie…a woman with gorgeous eyes…
She was as tall as me and very willowy, the woman looked at me through the open door.
...
“…does…Eun-Eungyu live here…?”
...
...
I could see two of her faces in front of me…the woman nodded her head slowly…
...
…are they friends…?
“…is Eungyu home…?”
She silently shook her head…
“…thank you…”
She looked at me up and down and then slammed the door in my face.
...
I shakily went over to the stairs and sat down…
“…this doesn’t make sense…they’re friends…friends…God, hurry up, I miss you, you bastard.”
I buried my face in my knees and was muttering to myself when I heard footsteps come up the stairs…
I got up from my seat quickly, and then, sat back down, burying my face even deeper into my knees.
…the footsteps walked past me…
I know…
…even by listening to his footsteps I can tell it’s him…
I swallowed my tears, rubbing my face into my knees…
I relaxed my breathing…1.…2.…1...2.…1.…2.…
I want to greet him with a happy face, I forced my legs to stand up…
He reached for the doorbell and rang it.
“Who is it?” The woman’s voice said over the intercom.
“It’s me Eungyu!!! I bought some crackers!!! Today’s dinner is crackers!!!”
...
…the door opened.
“Okay, okay. ^_^ First thing you talk about when you come in is food. Oh right, come girl came to look for you.”
“…O_O…probably some girl from school…I’m cold…I’m cold…let me it…”
....
......
+BAM!+
…the door closed behind him with a bang…
…
…
…I can’t believe this…
....
Chapter 99
I dropped the soju bottle in my hand and it rolled down the stairs…and to match that, my phone rang…
…when I looked at the ID it was my pretty dongseng Nari…
I turned off my phone…
…it’s a misunderstanding…it’s just a friend…it’s his friend…
I waited too long…I've waited too long for this day…
Let’s trust Eungyu…
Jungwon, let’s trust Eungyu…
Because of the alcohol, I got a weird boost of energy and I pushed his doorbell. I tightly closed my eyes, waiting for his door to open.
“Eungyu! I think it’s the person from earlier!”
“…what?”
The door opened and I could smell the familiar scent of his shampoo through the crack he’d opened. I raised my hand as calmly as I could and waved.
“…hi…it’s been a while…”
...
....
My lips are moving on their own, with my slurred voice I stood in front of him for the first time in months…
…the light brown eyes…
…his messy brown hair…
…his tan face…
…how are you going to welcome me? What kind of face are you going to use when you say your first words to me…?
Please…smile…
Don’t make any other face…just smile…
…
…
“…huh?? O_O…?”
.....
........
“…it’s Jungwon…long time no see…”
“You want some too? ^_^ .”
...
…w-what…?
“Eungyu, I’ll fry you some dinner, go talk to your friend!”
The lady said wearing an apron and pushing Eungyu out the door…
...
Eungyu looked at me up and down blankly…he looked next to me and stared at the shattered bottle pieces…
“…oh no. They’re all broken.”
“…you…remember me right…? It’s me, Jungwon…”
I was already tearing up…tears that I’d kept back for 5 months…he crouched down on the floor and started drawing circles on the floor.
“…is the person inside…your girlfriend…?”
...
...
He grinned brightly and nodded his head vigorously…
“…she’s your girlfriend…?”
“…yeah, it’s cold. I want to go inside. TT_TT …”
…
I’m being punished…I know I am…
…someone should have told me…then I couldn’t have come down to look for him…
...
I couldn’t read anything in his eyes…the only thing he seemed to care about was his dinner…I couldn’t see myself in them anywhere…
I opened my mouth towards Eungyu, who had grabbed for the door handle.
“…can I wait for you…?”
“Dinner!!! Alright!!!”
The door slammed behind with a loud bang.
“…are you just sending your guest away? Who is she? Is she your nuna?”
“I dunno, my head hurts.”
“Oh right, I got your medicine earlier. It’s on the counter.”
I slid down the door, listening to Eungyu’s voice…
…I pulled out the necklaces and the one dollar bill from my pocket…
…about 3 months ago…
I’d gone to the super market and just by chance I’d gotten this dollar with a bunch of other change…
…and on the corner of the one dollar bill…
My Piggy…
I think I cried a little back then…I wanted to ask you if this small note written was one you had written when we met again…
…but I can’t ask you anything anymore…you’ve changed so much…
I could hear Eungyu’s voice flow from outside the window…I think I was just sitting outside his house for around 2 hours…
I shoved my hand that was reaching for the doorbell into my pocket and started down the stairs…
Eungyu…
…I think I might die…
I’m being punished…that’s all….you must have been hurt this much too…
...
I’m just being punished for all the things I’ve done to you…
It hurts to breathe…it’s hard to just keep my eyes open…I just hate being alive right now…
...
I barely got home, my head cloudy…it was around 3 in the morning, I was trying to open the front gate when the gate to the house next door opened…
Out came Sohyun unnie…looking exhausted…I haven’t seen her in a long time either…
…damn…they’re so alike…they look so alike…
I quickly turned my head…
“Hi Jungwon, I haven’t seen you in a while…”
“…hi…”
“Are you coming back from somewhere?”
“I’m just coming back from seeing your brother…your brother…”
“…what?”
She seemed to be a little surprised and she slowly walked over to me…
“…you must’ve been shocked…”
“…you knew too… ^_^.”
“Of course, I’ve known for 3 months…”
....
......
“…it’s been 3 months…?”
“…I’m sorry…I couldn’t tell you…it would have been better if you didn’t find out…”
...
2 months after breaking up with me, you found someone else…? After only 2 months…?
…you forget someone easily don’t you…
“…do you’re not going to see Eungyu anymore…?” Sohyun unnie asked, her voice getting softer…
“Am I not going to see him?”
“…yes…”
“It’s not that I’m not going to see him. I CAN’T see him anymore…”
Sohyun unnie stared at me…I turned my head because of their resemblances…
“…you’re never going to see him again…?”
“…this isn't something I can control…”
“…I’m a little disappointed in you…”
After saying something that I didn’t understand, unnie walked back into the house…
.....
.........
“Disappointed…? Then what am I supposed to do? Do I have to hang onto him until the end? I have to hang on and cry to a person who’s thrown me away? To a person who’s turned their back me…I’ll do that if it means that he’ll come back…” I said to nothing in particular…
After muttering to myself like a retard, I closed my eyes hoping that it was nothing but a nightmare…
…I slowly fell asleep…just wishing it wasn’t real…
+Next Day+
“Jungwon, you have someone to see you.”
“…”
I opened my eyes…my eyes that were swollen so that they filled up half my face…
…and there was Heewon standing in front of me…
He jumped a little when he saw me…
“…what’s up.”
“…sorry that I ran away like that yesterday, tell your mom I said sorry.”
Silently, he pulled out a cigarette and sat down on my chair. While blowing out a stream of air, Heewon bent his head and said in a strained voice…
“…I’m sorry…”
“…about what? <_<.”
“I didn’t want you to go. I lied to you for 2 months…I didn’t think about you, and I kept you back because I wanted to be happy…
“Forget it, I would have done the same if I were in your position. I’m happy for you that your mom came back.”
“Dad’s gotten better also, he’ll be coming home this month.”
....
......
^_^...
“That’s good, you’re finally getting what you wanted. ^_^.”
“…did you meet…Eungyu…?”
“Huh? Not yet, he wasn’t there when I went down to see him yesterday…”
“Let’s go together.”
“…what?”
“Let’s go down today. I want to see you and Eungyu together and then I’ll finally give you up like a man. ^0^ .”
Heewon mustered up a forced smile and put his cigarette out on my desk without my permission and got up off the seat.
“N-no!”
“Why not? O_O .”
“…oh…just that…I want…never mind…I can handle seeing him on my own.”
.....
...
....
“I won’t fight with him, sheesh! I swear I won’t, get your ass off the bed!”
Heewon grabbed my hand and pulled me off. I used all my strength to sit back down, but I was exhausted from crying all night. He pulled me out all the way outside…
....
“Heewon! Wait!”
“What now?”
“…you see, I want to look a little prettier when I see him. What if he runs away looking at my face, I want to look my best. Don’t worry, I can go alone when I feel that I look good. ^_^.”
....
....
He let go of my hand and glared at me while shoving his hands into his pocket.
“Fine! Be that way!!! Asshole <_< .” He started walking forward…
“…Heewon…we…we…”
“WE WHAT?!?!?!”
“…we can be friends again, right?!”
"........."
Instead of answering, he made the okay sign he always made above his head.
“Let’s eat, friend!”
“…okay… ^_^.”
It won’t be easy for me or Heewon…
…forgetting a loved one in less that a day…
It might hurt a lot…and we might end up crying at night for no reason…
Heewon, you and I will try our best…
But…
Why do I feel that I’m waiting for him even after saying that I won’t…
…it’s embarrassing…
…and like that…a long year passed…
Even after a year, all I do is cry…
During the day, I’m Yoon Jungwon…at night, I’m a dummy…crying because I long for you…
...
I looked out the window into your house…wondering if you’ve come home…
…I’ve even gone down to where you live a few times to see if I could run into you…
…but every time I saw you and that young woman laughing…I always turned around and came home…
I thought a year would be enough…
I thought a year would be enough to forget you…
…but like every other day…I wait for you…
I still haven’t forgotten you…
…please come back…
..
......
Last Chapter.
“Hello?”
“Jungwon?”
“…Seohyun unnie…”
“Come out! Let’s meet in front of the college park! I’ll buy you and Nari food!”
“…right now…?”
“Keep it a secret from Heewon, today’s girl’s night out.”
“…okay, I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay!!!”
.....
......
I practiced smiling in front of the mirror like I always did and walked out the front gate.
+College Park+
There was Seohyun unnie inside the gates with Nari standing next to her. As she spotted me, she waved me over.
“Unnie! ^0^ .”
It’s been the first time I’ve seen Nari in a while, ever since I’ve gone to see him last year, Nari and Seohyun unnie haven’t even said his name in front of me…
…even if they went down to Suwon to visit Eungyu, they’d keep it a secret from me and go by the two of them…
…I didn’t want it to be like this…it’s okay…I can bear to look at him even if it hurts. It’d be better looking at him even when it hurts than not being able to see him and longing for him…
“Let’s eat first!! I was drumming for 5 hours today!!! I think my arms are going to fall off!!! So what do you want to eat first?”
Seohyun unnie rested an arm around my shoulders and Nari walked up to me awkwardly and smiled.
“What do you want to eat? How’s spaghetti?”
“Great. ^_^.”
I only do the stupid stuff at night, in the day I’m strong! The three of us all started heading towards the spaghetti restaurant when…
…Seohyun unnie stopped walking right in her tracks…
“They’re having a concert, let’s check it out!”
“…a concert at this time in the park? That’s weird.” Nari said slowing down her walk.
“No! Let’s go check it out! Come on!”
“…but I’m hungry…TT_TT…”
“…I’m in this craze about outside concerts these days! Just 10 minutes!!!” Seohyun unnie yelled grabbing Nari’s hand and running towards the park.
Yeah, they don’t care about me… <_< One by one, people started to gather around the stage…
...
I could see Seohyun unnie shoving her way to the front, I could see Nari muttering annoyed to herself. A guy’s voice…a thin voice was talking loudly without a mike…
“You see!!! We don’t usually perform and we don’t come to Seoul often! But our pal’s hometown is just over here so here are 8 songs! I hope you enjoy this!!!”
.....
......
Light clapping came from around the small crowd, and there was Seohyun unnie…frozen to her spot…
“It’s not easy doing things like this for free, we’re pretty popular around here too! Believe it or now, here’s our first song! Sung by the hottie of our group! He’s really good-looking so all you ladies don’t faint!”
...
.....
God, he talks a lot doesn’t he? I thought to myself and shoved myself up towards Seohyun unnie.
“Yeah he’s so good looking!!! Oppa! You are too!!!”
....
Annoying yells from girls started escaping from here and there…
“Haha! You all have high standards don’t you!! Here’s our first song!!!” After the man’s endless blah blahing ended, the song finally started…
...
The drum intro began and I tapped frozen Seohyun unnie’s shoulders.
“Unnie, isn’t that the person Eungyu’s going out with? Isn’t that the person Eungyu’s rooming with? It was a man?!?!?! Eungyu likes men?!?!?”
“…what? What the hell are you saying…?”
What the hell is this? I swear that’s the person Eungyu’s been rooming with!!! IT was a man?!?!
I can’t believe this!!!
Eungyu likes men?!?!
Right then, I heard Nari’s teary sobbing…
“…Eungyu oppa….”
What the hell is this? …Eungyu oppa?
But there was a guy…at the front of the stage, singing a beautiful song with not much of an expression on his face…
A cat we snuck home~~~ An ugly little cat~~~
A cat that steals and eats tomatoes~~~
Every night he sits on the windowsill and sadly looks over at the house next door~~~
Send me back~~~ Please send me back~~~
I thought this was the end of my crying~~~
With Pupu’s soft crying~~~ I feel myself crying with him~~~
…
.....
I covered my mouth with one hand and started shaking in my spot. Seohyun unnie tightly squeezed my shoulders reassuringly…
“…unnie…why is Eungyu singing that song…he’s forgotten all about me...he…he doesn’t think about me anymore…wow….I didn’t know Eungyu was going out with a guy…I’m totally beat. I got beaten by a man. Total KO.”
“…I don’t know what the fawk you’re saying, he’s Eungyu’s music buddy. Eungyu’s boyfriend?? O_O .”
“He’s going out with Eungyu!!!”
“WHAT?!” Seohyun unnie yelled in a loud voice, blocking out Eungyu’s singing for a split second.
What the hell is all this? What’s happening right now all of a sudden…
“…Jungwon…what are you saying…?”
“…that person…Eungyu said that he was going out with him…Even Sohyun unnie asked me if I was shocked because of that. I know everything, you don’t have to hide anything from me, I didn’t know that it was a man…”
An fat and ugly cat~~~
A skinny and good-looking guy~~~
Send us to Her~~~
Please let us be next to Her~~~
I wave bye to the moon today like every other day~~~
I wave a tearful farewell with the moon~~~
Watch over Her tonight~~~
I really thought this was the end of my tears~~~
But because of Pupu’s sobbing I find myself crying along with him~~~
Eungyu continued to sing…
…stupid guy…he keeps saddening me with his face…his voice…
It hurt so much to see him that I was about to walk past Seohyun unnie when she grabbed my shoulders tightly and started yelling at me.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!!! That guy is just Eungyu’s roommate!!!”
“I know! Sohyun unnie told me!!!”
“…you know what?! Don’t you know what happened to Eungyu!?”
"......."
“You didn’t know?! You didn’t know all this time?! You thought that person was Eungyu’s boyfriend?!?”
“…then what is it that you know…”
“You fawking retard!! Oh my God…I can’t believe this…I thought that you threw Eungyu away because he became a dummy!!! That’s why I didn‘t bring him up…”
“…dummy? What’s that mean…?” Seohyun unnie let out a bitter laugh.
“Nari and I didn’t even know…we thought you threw him away…”
“I don't get what you’re saying now, what do you mean….”
Nari walked up to us and started bawling like a small child….
“We thought you threw away Eungyu oppa!!! We thought you know!!! He got in a huge accident two months after he went down to Suwon!!! His head got broken!!!”
.....
….what? …what did you just say…?
“…we thought you threw away Eungyu oppa because of that…I hated you for it…”
“Dummy? Shin Nari…what do you mean…? Accident?”
“…one of the lights fell on top of his head during a performance…he hasn’t lost his memories…it would have been better if that’s what had happened…but…instead…his head’s been broken…”
…wait…then what Sohyun unnie was talking about…
“…you’re never going to see him again…?”
“…this isn't something I can control…”
“…I’m a little disappointed in you…”
Sohyun unnie was talking about the accident…?
What Nari told me about not bothering Eungyu…
…Eungyu…the things you said to me when we met…the weird things you said…the medicine that was laid out on the counter…
....
…..it was all….
......
….because of the accident…
Eungyu set his mike down on the stand, and the crowd cheered for an encore…
…
The guy prettier than the average girl…the guy I’d mistaken for Eungyu’s boyfriend opened his mouth…
“I know you all want to hear some more, but unfortunately, this is all that my friend knows how to sing. ^_^.”
A guy with longish hair had already picked up the mike and was starting to sing a fast upbeat song.
…I saw Eungyu walk down the stage and heading out the park…
…a dummy…? …an accident…?
Eungyu…I can’t believe you…
…you head’s broken…I don’t understand any of this…
“…aren’t you going to go after Eungyu?” Seohyun unnie asked slapping my face playfully. Without answering after her, I chased after his backside as fast as I could…
I ran u behind him and hugged him as tightly as I could from behind.
“It’s a stalker!!!”
....
......
“…you had nothing to do so you go around getting hit by lights? Retarded bastard…”
“…let go of me!!!”
“Hey, hey you dummy, I heard you got your head all broken up. Haha, you make a lot of trouble for yourself don’t you? …don’t you remember me? Huh? Retard, do you know who I am?” I asked rubbing my face into his face and crying like a small child.
“My friend from the house next door!!!”
“…retard…I was your girlfriend from the house next door…”
“Hehe, I know ^0^ .”
“What would I have done if you hadn’t come today!!!”
“…TT_TT…I miss Pupu…”
.......
.......
“…do you want to go see Pupu?”
“…yeah…hehe…”
Eungyu grabbed my hand tightly and started waving brightly over towards Seohyun unnie and Nari, running over to them all the while holding onto my hand.
Seohyun unnie turned around quickly and wiped away her tears, and turned back around and grinned at Eungyu and me. Next to her stood Nari, tears pouring out of her eyes…she didn’t bother wiping them away…
…Eungyu’s become a dummy…
…Eungyu’s head has broken…
I didn’t want to believe he was like this…I felt my heart was trapped inside a cage…
Let’s not be greedy…step by step…that’s all I need to do…
…let’s turn him back…step by step…
“…hey, look at this. Look at this, did you write this? You did, huh?”
I took out the dollar bill in my pocket that I had carried around for 365 days…
“…huh? Yeah, ^0^ .”
...
....
He nodded his head vigorously….
“I knew it was you. You liked me a lot didn’t you, do you remember that?”
“Yeah. O_O .”
“…they fixed Heewon’s dad…so they can fix you too…he’s come back, so you can come back too.”
“Go back to where? O_O .”
“…back to where we used to be…Hey, Dummy, do you remember your band’s name?”
“…band’s name…?”
.....
......
“…Do…Re…Mi…Fa…Sol…La…Ti…Do! Don’t you remember?”
“Oh yeah!! ^0^ .”
“You and I are going to go back to ‘Do’ okay? We’re going to go back to ‘Do’ holding each other’s hands, okay?”
“…I miss Heewon… >_< .”
....
......
“Okay, let’s go see Heewon…we’ll go see Jaegwang and then Sohyun unnie…and we’ll even see Pupu…”
I don’t know what he was so happy abount, but with an ice cream cone in his hand, he stood next to Seohyun unnie, blabbing about nothing and everything to her…
...
…and there stood Nari, walking next to me…
“How confident are you?” She asked in a small voice.
“About what?”
“Turning him back.”
“…very, I can get him back within a year…want to make a bet?”
“…the person who turns him back first gets him…”
“What?! Why you!!!”
“…^_^ , you promised.”
“No! I didn’t promise anything!”
“…I haven’t seen you smile in a year, unnie. O_O. Anyways, it starts now!!!”
“Shut up! And stop smiling!”
I yelled loudly and ran after Eungyu and Seohyun unnie, Nari quickly chased after me. I hung Jungwon around his neck and hung Eungyu around mine…
He frowned a little…
“You better have this on the rest of your life!!!”
My Piggy <3
I swear…I’ll turn you back within a year…
Then…like the necklaces, we’ll be able to go to the beach…kiss each other…eat a lot of yummy food…go to the amusement park…
Nari wiped away the tears in her eyes and I grabbed his hand…
…let’s not ever let go…
Let’s all meet at ‘Do.’
Please help me out~~
There are so many thoughts in my head....~~
I can’t do anything~~
Please.. make me a dummy~~~
I don’t know the meaning of my tears~~
Just make me a dummy, ignorant to everything~~
Like his song…Eungyu really had become a dummy…
…it seems as if he won’t know the meaning of tears…the meaning of living from now on…