Building a Successful Personality

Everyone’s personality is unique. In fact, personality is the sum
total of all behavioral and mental characteristics by which an individual is
recognized as being unique. Decisions define personality, personality
guides decisions. Among the many things that go to make a personality, some
are innate, some learned (acquired). Acquired traits in a personality exert
a powerful influence on human destiny-collective and individual. While a
constructive behavioral attitude can propel human society to glory, a
destructive personality can destroy the very foundations of a glorious
civilization. Personality development being so crucial to the health of
a society, it is sad that most of us are letting our personality take
shape up by itself. In other words, we are letting external forces to influence
and modify our behavior at will. No conscious effort is made to build a
personality. How many of us have consciously done it? It just happens.
In the absence of an internal modulator, TV, newspapers, magazines,
organizations and schools begin to play havoc with human minds. Diverse
ideas are propounded and it is seen that people not only learn it but absorb
it, internalize it and mimic it as though it is natural to them — a
bit like monkeys. What’s more they even think they are ‘cool’ in adopting,
these discordant pseudo values. It is no wonder that Darwin came out with his
origin of species’ Sham.
 

Obviously, the ideas clash. When one opinion is taken from the pope’s
sermon, another from a feminist, another from a gay activist, one from
the op-ed in he Times, one from Readers Digest and one from a TV soap, the
consequence is utter confusion, schizophrenia, bipolar states and
disaster — Individual and collective.
 

Human are a part of creation. No other part of creation, we notice, is
as confused as human minds are. The sun does not decide to take rest nor
does the moon rise in the west. There are n o galactic clashes. Everything
is fully disciplined, following a predictable behavior for an assigned
length of time.We have to develop an internal modulator to process information, have a
judgment process by which you thrash the good from the bad. Assimilate
the good and excrete the bad. The development of this standard, this
measure, this scale which distinguishes truth in all its forms from falsehood in
all its forms is the most critical aspect of personality development. In
fact, once developed, it is the personality itself. The Quran calls itself
the "FURQAN" and reveals the "MEEZAN". It gives us this knowledge to
distinguish the good from the bad.
 

It is interesting to note how civilizations have shaped personalities.
The Romans promoted physique and physical skills. It persists to this day
in our admiration of athletes, gymnasts, bull fighters and sports people.
There were those who encouraged literary arts, painting, dancing and music.
Some societies honored intellectual achievement. Personalities were judged
on these counts. How tall you were? How skillful you were? Could you dance
the samba? Could you play the piano? What physical achievement could you
boast of? What degrees in education did you possess? How much wealth did you
possess? If you are educated with all of the above, you are considered
cool, classy and jazzy. Nobody cares how truthful you are? How honest you
are, how faithful you are, the way you earn, the way you spend, how you talk to
neighbors, how you behave with parents and children, how you treat the
poor, the less fortunate! Here is where ISLAM steps in. It teaches us that
actions are judged not by consequences, but by intentions. It teaches us that
human differences in physique, in wealth, in intellect, in knowledge, in
abilities are all clever ploys by which God tests people.
The non-believers have frequently argued. "Hey! Look at these guys (in
rags) who cannot afford two square meals and have come to tell us (the
wealthy people) that what we do is incorrect. Can anything be more funny? How
could they claim their way leads to success when we are the people
responsible for the entire economy?" Today people say, "We made cars, airplanes,
rockets. We made all the comforts possible today. What did Muslims do? Nothing. So
who is better?"
 

While Islam does not discourage physical pursuits, pursuits of wealth and
knowledge, it exerts powerful and overwhelming stress on establishing
in public life, virtues like truth, honesty, trust, kindness, justice,
mercy, fairness, courtesy, manners of discipline and equally powerful stress
on the suppression (forced it need be) of injustice, dishonesty, cruelty and
bad manners.
 

A liar cannot also be a Muslim at the same time. One who cheats is not a
Muslim. One who does not keep promises is a Munafiq. One, who eats a
full meal while his neighbor goes hungry, is unlike a Muslim. Likewise one
who gambles, drinks and robs. Courtesy to women is stressed beyond limit. A
Muslim is fair in his dealings. He is not afraid to lose, rather is scared
to cheat. He would rater be a loser in this world. He is not even afraid of
death for the sake of justice. he believes that when truth, justice, honesty
are lost everything is lost. What remains — spouse, children, family, life,
wealth, house, business — is all inconsequential. He knows he has to
stand in front of Allah (SWT) and account for all his actions. What good are
wealth, family, education, or for that matter, your life when you
cannot benefit from these in THE trial of your life (unlike the trials you see
on this earth). These are universal truths. These are the premise on which
our inner voice acts, on which Muslims base their decisions and that
defines our personality. Let us pray to Allah (SWT) that He guides us to the
straight path, and in developing a total Muslim personality. To end, let us say,
to Allah (SWT) is all praise — the Lord of the universe.
 

(posted by: Sadia Nisar)

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