(Brandt)
It involved me and my foot in my mouth
And my wife
Then I got to thinking
Wouldn't it be grand if with every word I said
My wish was the world's command
I'd be the king I'd be the top
I'd give myself a raise, throw my own parade
Number one, the chief, the boss
I'd be the king
No honey-do list I'd rule
Whatever I say is the way that it goes
That'd be cool
And I'd go fishing
Or watch sports on TV
And folks would carry me around
And I'd get to wear a crown
And I'd never spend a day on my feet
I'd be living large
I'd be in charge and the whole world would bow to me
I'd be king
It happened again, I got in a fight
It involved me and my foot in my mouth
And my wife
