SAYING GOODBYE
A STORY OF THE
by Paul E. Jamison
"Murphy! There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!"
Murphy yawned and stretched and looked up from the little black hill that he’d been dozing against. When he saw that the ferret that woke him was Lady Belphebe, one of the Elders, he sat up much straighter. "Yes, Ma’am, what can I do for you?"
"Murphy, the other Elders and I are worried about the new ferret that came to the Bridge about two weeks ago, and we want your help to do something about it."
"Let’s see – that would be the dark-eyed white, wouldn’t it? Sammy, wasn’t that his name? Why, what’s wrong?"
"He’s not associating with any of the other folks at all. He hasn’t even tried to make any friends. He just stays by himself all the time."
Murphy raised his eyebrows. "Really? He’s been this way for two whole weeks? No kidding?"
"No kidding. Oh, he’ll get something to eat from Cookie often enough, but he always eats alone. And he’s polite to everyone he meets, but he gets out of any conversation as soon as he can, and he never talks to anyone on his own. We on the Council think that there’s something very wrong, and we want to find out what."
"There certainly is something wrong, from the sound of it. That’s definitely unnatural behavior, especially here under the Bridge." Murphy lay back down on the black hill, this time to frown and think. He looked again at Lady Belphebe. "Could he have been an only pet?"
"I don’t believe so",
the black hill said. It slowly moved around and revealed that it had the head
of a Rottweiler. The huge dog looked at the two ferrets and went on. "I
met the new guy a couple of days ago while he was going after some food. I ran
up to him and said, ‘Hey, there, fella! Welcome to the
Murphy chuckled. "You like meeting new people as much as I do, pal."
Somewhere on another slope of the hill, a big, black tail started thumping against the ground. "Yep. Anyway, I think a fur-person that was in a house with no other pets around wouldn’t know what a big, ugly monster like me was, and he would have been scared – or very curious. This new ferret wasn’t one or another. He looked up at me, calm as you please, and said, ‘Hello, Mr. Ollie, I’m pleased to meet you. My name is Sammy.’ I figure anyone as laid-back as that was raised in a household with a lot of animals around."
Murphy nodded. "That makes sense."
"But it’s like you said, Lady Belphebe, he didn’t stick around very long. He said good-bye as quick as he could and went on his way. I didn’t know what to make of that. Kinda hurt my feelings, but I figured it was just short-time jitters."
Lady Belphebe replied,
"Actually, he adjusted to being here at the Bridge quite quickly, from
what Elder Penfold said. Penfold met Sammy soon after he arrived, and told us
that at first he was very upset about leaving his human behind – that’s to be
expected. But once Penfold explained to him about the Promise of the
"Penfold says that right then Sammy seemed like the friendliest ferret under the Bridge – except for every other ferret here, but you get the idea. But it wasn’t long after that Sammy drew away from the rest of us."
Murphy thought about this. "Odd – very odd." He looked at Lady Belphebe. "What can I do to help?"
"We’d like you to go to him and try and make friends. Use your own judgment as to how to proceed. But do what you can to find out why he’s acting this way."
"I’ll do my best, Lady. I got one question, though – why me?"
"Three reasons: For one, what with all that’s been going on recently, none of us Elders have enough time to give this matter the attention it deserves. For another, you, Murphy, are very good at making friends with just about every type of creature that comes here to the Bridge; you make an excellent ambassador."
The Lady smiled then. "And finally, I’m asking you to do this, and I’m an Elder. I don’t really need a reason other than that."
"Can’t argue with any of that." Murphy got up and stretched. "Where is he now?"
"He’s made himself a home of sorts in that small ring of pine trees up on Kodo’s Hill. He stays there all the time, except to get some food."
Murphy looked at her and didn’t say anything. He knew the place. Indeed, it held special memories for him. Finally, he said, "All right, I’ll be on my way, then. I’ll get back with you when I find something out. My Lady – talk with ya later, Ol’", and he headed for Kodo’s Hill.
The stand of trees on Kodo’s Hill was thin enough that Murphy could see into the clearing before he actually came up to it, and he stopped to watch the new guy, Sammy.
The dark-eyed white didn’t have much in the way of possessions – just a few toys and a food carrier. Right at the moment, he was playing with a pine cone, attacking it and tossing it up in the air. Murphy didn’t think he was all that enthusiastic about the game. Playing alone probably got boring fast. What was it with this guy?
Well, one way to find out. Murphy approached the clearing, making sure to step on whatever twigs and dry pine needles he could find; a surprise entrance would make things much more difficult. Sammy heard, and he stopped playing to watch Murphy enter the clearing.
Murphy smiled and said, "Hey there, I hear you’re new in these parts! It’s a bit late, but welcome to the Bridge!" He reached out with his paw. "My name’s Murphy – call me Murph!"
The other ferret shook Murphy’s paw, without much enthusiasm. "I’m pleased to meet you. My name’s Sammy. Is there something I can do for you?"
"Well, I wanted to see how you were getting on. How do you like it here?"
"It’s nice here. The hills and valleys are beautiful, and the food’s great. This is a fine place to stay until I move on."
Murphy looked around the clearing. "You’ve picked out a nice, cozy little spot here. Great to sleep on a bed of pine needles, I tell you. Seems pretty bare, but that’s just me."
He turned to Sammy. "You know, there’s a group of ferrets here that like to get together and play a game of Weaselball. It can get pretty exciting and they have a lot of fun. I saw you flinging that pinecone around, and I think you’d be a Weaselball natural. Whaddaya say – think you might be interested in trying out?"
The other ferret’s face went blank, and he answered, "Thank you, but I don’t think so. I much prefer playing by myself."
"You sure? There’s always a big dinner party held after a game. Lotsa good food and everybody has a great time. It would be a good way of meeting folks."
Sammy’s reply was cooler this time. "No. I want to be left alone."
Well, this isn’t going anywhere. Murphy decided that a direct approach was his only option. "All right – why? Why don’t you want to make friends or have anything to do with the rest of us? Sammy, the Elders are worried about you. What’s wrong?"
"Nothing’s wrong! I can keep to myself if I want, and I don’t have to explain why to anybody!" The two ferrets stared at one another for a few seconds. Finally Sammy went on, more softly, "Look, Murphy, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be rude. I appreciate the Elders’ concern, and yours. Really I do. Everybody here has been very nice. But I would really prefer to stay by myself while I’m here at the Bridge, until I see my Mommy again. I think that would be best for me."
Murphy looked at him and shook his head. "Until your Mommy comes? Do you realize how long that might be? My Daddy was only 23 when I came here, and that was fifteen years ago. It’s gonna be a long time before I see him again – and he told me once that his family tends to long lives. I don’t know how old your Mommy is, but I’m willing to bet that you’ll be here a long time before you see her again. Oh, she may show up anytime soon, but you don’t know that for sure. Have you given any thought to what it’s gonna be like for you to be completely by yourself for all that time?"
Sammy was gazing at the ground, and he didn’t look up when he answered, "Yes."
"But you don’t have to be alone here! There isn’t one single animal here that isn’t a nice, friendly guy, and everybody would be happy to be your friend. You’d have loads of fun, and the day you see your Mommy again will come before you know it. What’s wrong with any of that?"
For the longest time, the other ferret said nothing, until Murphy thought that he wasn’t going to answer at all. Then Sammy replied, in a quiet voice, "I’m afraid to make any friends here."
"Afraid? Why in blue blazes –"
"Because it’s gonna hurt when I have to say good-bye to them."
Murphy said nothing. The other
ferret raised his head and went on. "I understand about the
He sighed. "After I talked with the Elder Penfold, I thought about it. When I do cross over the Bridge, I’ll have to leave everybody I know here behind. And for all I know, I’ll never see them again. I don’t want to lose a friend that way.
"Mommy loves animals. I grew up with a lot of fuzzy brothers and sisters, of all types. She had a Saint Bernard, named Prissy, that I loved a lot, and I miss so much. That big dog used to enjoy picking me up in her mouth and carrying me around. And she never once hurt me doing that. She was so gentle…
"I love making friends, and it would be easy to do that here. I liked that big dog, Ollie, that I met the other day, and it was tempting to dance for him. But losing a friend would hurt so much, and once you say good-bye here, it might be for good."
Murphy said, "And then you figured that you wouldn't have to worry about losing your friends if you never made any friends here in the first place? So you decided to stay by yourself until you crossed the Bridge with your Mommy?" Sammy nodded, but didn’t say anything.
Murphy sighed. This was a new one on him, but he could see the logic behind it; under different circumstances, he might have accepted it himself. He went on. "That makes sense, but from where I stand, I can see some flaws in your reasoning.
"This place is about love. It’s not only the love we feel for the Mommies and Daddies that we left behind – and that we will see again someday – but the love we feel for each other. Everybody around here loves everybody else, and we all would do whatever we could to help someone else that’s hurting. We aren’t bugging you because we’re busybodies, Sammy, but because we care about you and about the sadness you must feel from missing your Mommy. The love isn’t here to hurt, but to heal.
"Yes, you’d have to say good-bye to some friends, but you’d also be making new friends. I think that would more than make up for the good-byes. It’s so easy to make new friends, and, believe me, the friendships you make here can be very strong indeed. Do you really want to turn your back on that friendship – on all the love – just because you’re afraid of being hurt once in awhile?"
Sammy didn’t say anything; he wouldn’t look at Murphy. Murphy looked around the clearing. He hadn’t been here for quite awhile; it was still as lovely a place as he’d remembered it. He said, "The way I see it, we’re all together here at the Bridge for a reason, and that’s to keep each other company. I suppose that it could be arranged so we each had our own personal place to wait for our humans. Just like this, with grass and trees and a blue sky and all the food and drink and toys we wanted – but there wouldn’t be anybody else around. Just each one of us alone. It sounds awfully lonely to me.
"Then again, an arrangement like that wouldn’t be any help to the orphans at all."
Sammy looked at Murphy. "Orphans?"
"Oh, yeah, nobody’s
explained that to you yet. A lot of furry babies leave the physical world
without ever bonding to a human, for any of a number of reasons. What they
mostly come down to, unfortunately, is that not all humans are kind and loving
like our Mommies and Daddies. All those little ones come to the
Murphy waved one arm around, indicating the clearing. "In fact, it’s quite a coincidence that you staked out this place to settle down in. A lot of the time the orphans that come here are so young that they can’t take care of themselves, and we need a nice, quiet, private place to use as a nursery until they grow a little bigger and can take care of themselves. What with all these trees around and a soft bed of pine needles, this place is ideal."
Sammy stared at Murphy for a moment and looked around the clearing that he’d called his own for two weeks. His eyes widened with horror. "Oh, no! … Oh, no!! … What have I – I’ve been – I’m so – I didn’t know! – "
Murphy placed a paw on the other ferret’s shoulder. "Hey, relax. No harm was done. There are plenty of other nurseries around, and we haven’t needed this one. Quite honestly, I think you needed this place, at least for a little while, to heal your own hurts. The last time this place was used was about five months ago."
Murphy’s voice got softer. "It was a litter of ferret kits. They were only two weeks old and were completely helpless. Their eyes weren’t even open yet. They needed round-the-clock attention…" He stopped as the memories took hold of him.
He’d been one of eight volunteers who took turns staying with the tiny, squawking babies, keeping them warm and filling their little tummies with Cookie’s special "Formula". And, most important, handling them and cuddling them. A loving touch made all the difference at that age.
Murphy’s favorite memory of those weeks was the day when he’d been holding a little boy with his eyes still tightly squeezed shut. Murphy had looked away for a few seconds – another volunteer, a feline friend of his named Griddlebone, had made a comment about all baby animals looking cute at that age, and Murphy had said something about, well, yeah, maybe, but he’d seen some pretty ugly baby birds – and when he’d looked back, there had been two tiny little black eyes, open for the very first time, wide and full of more curiosity and wonder than you’d thought they could hold.
Murphy had just looked into those two tiny eyes for what seemed forever, and then he’d said, "Hi, there, little guy". He’d been rewarded with a faint "Hi", and a little smile. Then the kit had said, "I s’eepy – I go s’eep", and had closed his eyes again.
That particular kit had later been named Little Murphy…
Murphy came back to the present and realized that he’d missed something Sammy had said. "I’m sorry – I was a million miles away. What was that?"
"I asked what happens to the orphans?"
Murphy smiled. "They get adopted. That’s one of the best parts of this place. The Mommies and Daddies that come through here to pick up their own furkids can adopt some of the orphans if they want to. And there’s never a shortage of humans that want more furkids. I know that there has never been an orphan here under the Bridge that didn’t end up with a Mommy or Daddy."
For the first time since Murphy
had met him, Sammy smiled. "That’s good to hear. There’s obviously so much
I don’t know about the
He looked at Murphy and said thoughtfully, "To tell you the truth, I have been lonely the past two weeks. But saying goodbye to friends, when I may not ever see them again, still scares me a little."
Murphy nodded, "Yeah, I can understand that. It’s something you’ll have to learn to handle. But you’ll always have other friends to help."
"Do you think we see our
friends again – after we’ve passed over the
"I don’t know," Murphy replied. He looked up at the multi-colored arc of the Bridge. "We don’t really know what Heaven is like, exactly. It’s probably better than we imagine; it might even be better than we can imagine. All we know is that we go there with the humans we love, so it must be wonderful. I’ll tell you what I think, though. The friendships we make here mean so much to us, and I think they’re meant to. It doesn’t make any sense to me that we would be given something so special just to have it taken away when we go to a better place. I’m guessing that we all meet again."
Sammy looked off into the distance for a few moments. He had a lot to think about. Then he looked at Murphy and said, "Well, I’ll just have to hope that that’s the way it is. It sounds like it’s worth the risk. Thank you for caring enough to come here." He reached out, and the two ferrets shook paws again, this time with more warmth. "And thanks for not calling me a self-centered jerk."
Murphy chuckled. "Well, I’m glad that it didn’t get that far. Though it could’ve, if you’d been the stubborn type."
Sammy laughed. It felt good to laugh. Then he said, "Oh, by the way, is that invitation for the dinner party tonight still on? That might be a good starter for me. What’s on the menu?"
"Of course it’s still on. And Cookie always makes the best meals for these things. I heard that tonight will be roast chicken with sweet potatoes. Dessert will be chocolate mousse."
Sammy’s eyes went wide, and he licked his chops. Then he frowned. "Chocolate? Sweet potatoes? Isn’t that stuff bad for us?"
Murphy laughed. "What – here
at the
The other nodded, "Good point. All right, chicken and sweet potatoes and chocolate, as much as my tummy can hold. Sounds great to me!"
As the two ferrets began to gather up the toys and clean up the clearing, Murphy said, "You know, there’s still time to get in on the Weaselball game, too. I do think you’d be a natural at that."
"Oh, I’m sure you’re right, and I’ll get in on it later. But for today, I think I want to go around and apologize to everybody I’ve met so far. I know that I’ve been rude and I want to make up for it. I especially want to apologize to that Rottweiler. He seems really nice."
"Oh, yes, Ollie. You’re right; he is a great guy. His full name is Olympic, by the way. That was the name of some great big passenger ship from the early 20th Century. I think it’s a cool name.
"And I’ll tell you something else. There won’t be any hard feelings, not with him. And it’s not too late to war-dance for him. I think that he’d love it."
And he did…
"…And that, my dear Grid, is Sammy’s story."
"H’m." The cat settled himself more comfortably against the tree trunk. "I’m glad that you were able to show him how wrong-headed he was. There’s no telling how long he would have stuck with it – it’s amazing how miserable folks will make themselves for the sake of pride." Griddlebone looked at his ferret pal. "Ya done good, Murph."
Murphy smiled. "Thanks. It’s great to see how much he’s changed over the past two days. He had a great time at the party, and look at him now."
The two fur-friends were leaning against a tree and watching the day’s Weaselball game. At the moment two separate wrestling matches had taken two pairs of ferrets out of play. And off to one side, a mass wardance had broken out, involving several players. Right in the middle of the dance was Sammy, jumping up and down and swinging his head from side to side and dooking up a storm. He was the picture of pure joy.
Murphy said, "I was right about him being a natural – he’s great at tossing the ball around."
"So I’ve noticed – when he actually is paying attention to the ball."
The cat watched the action for a little while. Then he said, "He is a friendly fellow. I only talked with him for a short time at the party, but I could tell that he loved meeting everybody. Did you know that there were five cats in his family? Why, he told me –"
After a moment, Murphy said, "What was it he told you?" He looked over at his friend. "Grid, is something wrong? What’s up?"
But Griddlebone had gotten up and was looking in the distance. Murphy looked that way and saw a human woman approaching.
The cat took a few steps forward and said, softly, "Mommy?"
Griddlebone started to run for the human, and only got a short distance away before stopping and looking over his shoulder at his old friend. Then the cat ran back and they held each other in a warm, strong embrace. It lasted only a fraction of a second, but it was a long fraction of a second. Then they parted and the cat started to edge away.
"Murph – Murphy – I’m gonna miss you – you’ve been my best friend here – I just hate saying goodbyes! –"
"I know, Grid – but she’s waiting for you – you’d better go … Goodbye, buddy –"
Griddlebone turned away and ran to his Mommy. The closer he got, the faster he ran. Soon he joined about a dozen other animals that were mobbing the human and jumping around her.
Murphy stood there and watched the reunion. Somebody came up beside him and watched as well. Soon the woman and her furry children started to move away. Murphy waved once, and one of the cats waved back. Then the group passed over a hill and was lost from sight.
Neither Murphy nor the other made a sound for a long time. Finally Sammy asked, "Are you okay, Murph?"
Murphy sighed and said, "I’ll be fine. It’s not like this hasn’t happened before." He knuckled a tear away from one eye. "You were right – saying good-bye does hurt. For a bit.
"But Grid and I have a lot of happy memories of our time here together. Lotsa fun times and funny stories. I’ll miss him, but I’m glad I knew him."
Sammy replied, "I’m glad I met him when I had the chance. You know, Murphy, when you were talking to me about the joys of friendship making up for the pain of goodbyes, you never mentioned the most important thing about farewells around here."
"Oh? And what’s that?"
"The happiness that you feel for the friend that you’re saying goodbye to. Around here, there’s only one reason to say goodbye, and that’s because someone is going to cross the Bridge with the human that means so much to them. I don’t see how anyone can’t feel good about that."
Murphy grinned. "You’re right. That’s what this place is all about. You learn fast, friend."
Sammy grinned back. "I had a good teacher. And now, I think you could do with a good game of Weaselball. Am I right on that, too?"
"Right as rain." The two ferrets headed for the playing field.
Sammy said, "I’m a sucker for a good story. I’d like to hear some more about the fun times you and Griddlebone had together."
Murphy replied, "Certainly! As long as you tell me whatever it was you told him at the party. He started to say something about it when there was this – interruption, and I’m gonna go nuts unless I hear more about it!"
"Okay, we can go into all that later. Right now I’d like you to explain a few things to me about Weaselball. It’s great fun, but I’m having a hard time figuring out the rules!"
Murphy grinned as wide as he could and said, "What rules?"
Sammy looked at him and said, "Ah. I see. In that case I won’t bother asking about how you tell the teams apart…"
THE END
Copyright © 1999 Paul E. Jamison
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