And now for a word from my sponsors...

My experiment in exploiting that tried and true capitalist tool, the ad, has failed.  I was trying to get money to help the children.  Well, I, er, I mean, the children didn't earn a darned cent from it.  That just goes to show that you all hate children!  Children haters!  Okay, okay, I hear you.  I'll leave the ads here on this page where you can click on them and help the children.  That is, unless you really do hate children!  So here they are.  Click them.  Click them hard and click them often!  Show you care!

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Are you interested in discovering your roots?  Maybe you wonder whether you're related to Bill Clinton or his self-serving, privileged, elitist, white wife.  Oooh, it takes a village, huh?  How about it takes sending your kid off to private school?  Any way, check out your heritage at this link:

Uh oh, did you forget what special occasion is coming up?  You'd better send some flowers to the appropriate person by clicking this link.  If you don't, they'll hate you.  They will.  Really.  I'd hate you if you forgot me.  Send flowers, you bastard.

Movie trivia!  Do you know the answer or are you stupid?  Find out!  Plus, you can check local movie times and order DVDs!  This is what surfing's all about!

This dead link removed

They say that sex sells, so here's a nonsensical and stupid animated gif of a dancing girl.  Buy something!