Author's notes: This fic was written right after a painful break-up, so you can see where all the angst comes from. But the ending is happy, so smile! ^_^
Warnings: bad language, and of course, yaoi ^^
Feedback: yes, please. I love it! *especially on pitiful little pieces like this one..* [email protected]

// // denotes thoughts
" " is speaking



Bloody Dreams

He slid the knife down the sensitive skin of his wrist, watching the blood flow down his arm. He brushed chestnut bangs out of his eyes, and clicked the blade back in. He watched in morbid fascination as it dripped a crimson trail, down his pale arm, down over his black shirt, to pool on the white bedsheets. He hunched over, the ache in his heart greater than any physical pain. Tears poured down his cheeks, soaking his sleeve as he tried to wipe them away. The force of his sobs left him trembling and gasping for air. He rocked back and forth, the tail of his braid keeping time. "Why?" he murmured brokenly "Why?". Why was he even here? "So whatever gods there may be can get a kick out of torturing good old Duo Maxwell." he muttered bitterly. "Everyone I have ever loved...leaves me." his violet eyes narrowed, and he laughed humorlessly, a sharp, grating sound. "No...I have to fall in love with Heero "Stick up the ass" Yuy, the perfect fucking soldier. Cold hearted bastard." The mere thought of the blue-eyed Japanese boy made the tears fall harder. He clicked the knife out again, slitting his arm, this time a bit further up. "Damn you!" he yelled. "Why the hell do you have to be so fucking beautiful?!?" He stopped suddenly, sighing. "It's my fault. Why am I so stupid?" he laughed again. "Shouldn't I know it already? I will never have anyone. Anyone unlucky enough to get my love dies.."
He wrapped his bloody arms around his slender body, shivering again. "I guess...I'm just cursed. I'm the one you always love and leave..." He ran the blade across his arm again. "I guess I don't deserve love. Well, here's my punishment."
He got up off the bed, sliding his black shirt over his head, mindless of the cuts on his arms. He tossed it somewhere, not caring where it landed. His pants and boxers soon followed. He walked over towards his CD player, and hit the button. Music filled the room. "Falling Away From Me..." he smirked "how appropriate." He moved with the music, still making slashes up his arms. //Contemplating suicide...// the music played...the blood looked strangely beautiful...An odd smile touched his lips as it flowed down, down....
Heero cautiously cracked the door open, peeking into Duo's room. The sight before his eyes was one that he would remember forever. He saw Duo, his eyes closed, writhing to the beat of the music. His lips were forming the words of the song. He had a knife in one hand. Blood was everywhere: on his hands, flowing down his arms, on the bed. Heero stood there gaping for a moment before instinct took over. "What the hell is going on here?" he yelled. Duo turned around, his eyes widening for a second, before narrowing in a cold glare. Then, he smirked slightly. "What the fuck does it look like, Yuy?" Heero lunged at him, taking the knife from his hand and flinging it across the room. He held Duo's bloody wrists in his vice-like grip. "Just what the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked, his voice rising. Duo's smirk only widened, and he laughed bitterly. "What's it to you?" he added, almost as an afterthought, "It's not like you care, anyway." This was whispered so low, Heero strained to hear it. Duo lifted his face up, staring right into his eyes. "You don't even know" Heero's cobalt blue eyes darkened with fury. "You don't even understand me!" Duo screamed, forgetting his inhibitions. "I'm just an obstacle to you're precious missions, right? Or even less than that! I'm a baka you can't even be bothered with to take seriously!" he smiled sadly. "Isn't that right, Yuy? I'm just a fucking obstacle!"
Heero's eyes narrowed further. "I hate the way you wouldn't recognize love if it bit you on the ass!! Why the hell do I put myself up to this rejection? Why do you have to be so fucking gorgeous? I hate you! You've made me fall in love with you!!"
The last statement was at the top of his lungs. Duo's eyes widened he couldn't believe he'd finally spoken that out loud. He stared at Heero, unable to speak, unable to move. "How can you say that?" whispered Heero. He gave Duo the most pained look he had ever seen on someone besides himself. "You're the one that haunts my dreams. Every time I try to ignore you, I can't. I can't even remember my training. Your face is all I see...your ridiculous braid, it's frivolous for a soldier to have, but it's beautiful... j-just like you....you distract me from my mission, you change everything I've always believed in most....you confuse me...you amaze me...I love you..." he grabbed Duo's bare shoulders, and gave him a bruising kiss. There was nothing tender about it as two tongues sparred for dominance. Pain, pleasure all mixed into one heady combination.
Finally, they parted for air. Duo's pale cheeks were flushed and he was panting. Heero still held his wrists, the blood dripping unto his hands. Delicately, gently, Heero lifted one wrist up, softly licking the blood away. Duo decided this was one of the most erotic sights he had ever seen. Heero glanced up, and their eyes met. They leaned forward, and they kissed again. Duo could taste the familiar coppery taste of blood in Heero's mouth. Distantly, he heard the final notes dying away. Their mouths met again. He could hear "Closer" beginning as they sank to the floor.



~owari~