a snapshot, what i am
who am i now - this moment - this second.
it doesn't matter.
now, here and now is irrelevant -
all that matters to them is them and future and what.
so what then
what of this nonsense, this sense of nothingness
i'm afraid of nothing
because i'm afraid of everything.
i'm afraid of becoming nothing, living nothing.
not living
growing and nurturing a facade while the inside rots away
dying and still being alive in the space...
"...the worst kind of death, where the spirit dies first,
and the husk goes on, clack-clacking afterwards..."
it is possible to look up and never see clouds or sky
it is possible to touch, kiss, and never love
it is possible to live and die at once,
                    But it shouldn't be.
"To be or not to be..."
the never ending question.
"...to take arms against a sea of troubles..."
i want to give up, but i can't muster the strength for apathy
and de-sensitized acceptance.
can't shut up long enough to speak
never listen well enough to hear
emotion lies beneath the surface,
yet all that emerges is a contrived scribble
all well planned out 'thoughts'
-manipulation of self-
divorce, distension, distaste, discern...defeat.
continue? finish, complete, or just stop...?
This was an old English assignment...
Back.
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