Learning By Heart
Chapter 6
By: April
Disclaimer: The Passions characters featured in this story are the
property
of NBC, Passions, and its writers.
If it weren't for these people, I
could
not have come up with this story. This one is really more or less just
dedicated to the time once Sheridan gets to Paris that was not on the
show,
what could have happened, etc. The story gets much more creative in
the next
chapter.
Enjoy! From April
LEARNING BY HEART
Chapter Six
The Harmony Police Department was quiet when Special Agent Chase Michaels walked in.
She watched as a few officers milled around the coffee pot, smiling and
laughing about a joke one of them had told.
A few more were sitting at desks spread around the room.
After a moment, one of the officers noticed her waiting and greeted her warmly.
"Can I help you, Miss?"
Chase returned the smile. She had long ago gotten used to men
being nice to her until they found out she was with the Bureau.
Being a female FBI agent was unusual, but not unheard of.
The fact that she was 5'10" with long, flowing blonde hair,
large blue eyes, and a thin, athletic figure made it hard
for most people, especially the cops she had to deal with
on assignments like this one to believe she was one of them.
She had learned early on that the longer they thought she
was just a pretty face, the better. Unlike most agents,
she dressed down while traveling, and since she had come
strait from the airport to the police station, her hair
was tied back loosely and she was wearing a white t-shirt
and a pair of comfortable jeans and tennis shoes.
She knew that this poor kid would never make her for a cop,
let alone the FBI Special Agent in Charge taking over one
of the highest-profile crimes in the country. She decided to keep it that way.
"I�m looking for Chief Bennett. Is he here?" she asked, still smiling.
"Actually, you just missed him," the young man replied. "Is there anything I could help you with?"
"No, I�m afraid he�s the guy I need. Could you tell me where he is?" she asked casually.
The officer seemed to think about it for a moment before deciding.
"Yeah, he went to the hospital to work on a pending investigation."
"Thank you," Chase responded. She turned to leave.
Before she did, she remembered one more thing.
"Is Officer Lopez-Fitzgerald here?"
The officer shook his head slowly. "Actually, he�s at the hospital, too."
"Oh, the investigation." Chase said, trying to sound civilian.
"No," the man replied quietly. "Luis is on personal leave until further notice."
Chase was not one to be surprised easily, but the officer�s
comment caught her off guard. She had heard a great deal about
Luis, and from what she had been told, it didn�t make sense.
�Why would he be at the hospital?� Chase asked herself.
She knew that there was no love lost between him and the Crane
family, but she also knew that his best friend who was also
injured it the assault had already been released. �Which means he�s with Sheridan.�
Deciding to find out for herself, Chase headed for the hospital.
Pilar was sitting in Sheridan�s room when Sam Bennett walked in.
He looked at the sleeping woman before turning to Pilar.
"Has there been any change?"
Pilar nodded weakly. "They are finding signs of brain activity on the monitor,"
Pilar said quietly. "The doctor said that they may even be able
to take her off the ventilator soon and see if she will breathe on her own."
"Well, that�s good news, right?"
Pilar looked at Sam, and his heart went out to her. He knew that even though
Sheridan was Allistar Crane�s daughter by birth,
Pilar had raised her until she left for boarding school when she was a child.
Soon after she had returned to Harmony, Sam had seen the incredible
bond between them. He knew Pilar thought of her as one of her own
children, and that Sheridan loved her equally as much.
"Yes, it is," Pilar agreed, trying to sound reassured.
"I pray that she has the strength to recover,
not just for her sake, but..." her voice trailed,
as if she wasn�t sure if she could continue.
"But what?" Sam prodded, hoping that talking about things would help ease her heart.
Pilar looked at Sam, her dark eyes red-rimmed and tired.
"But for Luis� as well," she finished. "If she dies, he will never forgive himself."
"What do you mean?" Sam asked, surprised.
"Luis blames himself for letting this happen," Pilar explained quietly.
"Why?" Sam asked, genuinely confused.
"He feels like he should have been there. You know Luis, Sam.
He is very protective of the people he cares about.
If anything happens, he feels responsible."
Sam looked at Pilar for a moment before continuing.
"Can I ask you something, and I want you to tell me what you honestly think."
"Of course, Sam. What is it?"
Sam looked around quickly to ensure no one would overhear.
"Is Luis okay?" he asked quietly, not trying to hide the concern
in his voice. "I mean, the last time I saw him, he looked like
the walking dead. I tried to talk to him, but it was like talking
to a brick wall. Is he going to be able to handle it if Sheridan doesn�t make it?"
"Luis is a strong man," Pilar replied. "He has survived so much.
If you are asking me if he will be okay psychologically,
then yes, I think he will be alright with time.
If you are asking me about his heart, I honestly don�t know."
"What do you mean?" Sam asked.
"It has taken Luis years to learn to trust people after his father
disappeared. It has taken even longer for him to trust the
love in his heart," Pilar explained. "If he loses Sheridan,
I don�t know if he will ever trust himself to love again."
Pilar heard a sharp intake of breath, and turned to see
Beth standing behind her. She looked like someone had
knocked the wind out of her.
Pilar suddenly felt sorry she had said that aloud.
She knew that Beth was in love with her son and had been
for as long as she had known what love was, but Pilar
also knew that Luis had never loved Beth. Not in the same way she
had loved him. He had cared about her, and still did, but she
had not been able to get under his rough exterior and touch
his heavily-guarded heart.
The irony of it all was not lost on Pilar. Here stood a woman
who had been Luis� best friend and confidant for his entire life.
They had played in the same parks, gone to the same schools,
had done everything together.
When they started dating as freshmen, no one was surprised,
and Pilar had been happy for them both. She had thought that
Beth was everything Luis had said he had wanted in a woman
and potential wife.
As they had approached graduation, and talk of a possible
marriage started, Pilar had sat down with her son.
She would never forget the conversation they had.
Almost ten years earlier...
It was after 9 when Luis came in the door. "Hey, Mama."
"Hi, Luis. How was school?" Pilar asked, trying to work up
the nerve to talk to her son.
"You know," Luis replied, looking thoughtfully in the refrigerator,
"same old stuff. We did have our first graduation practice,
though."
Finally, he seemed to decide on what he wanted, and began pulling
out different ingredients. Pilar looked on, and she couldn�t
help but smile. Her son had become quite a man over the past few
years, and she beamed with pride.
She was still surprised by him every day at the way he handled
everything. He was at the top of his class in his grades,
he was captain of the baseball, basketball, and football
teams, he was Senior Class President, and he worked to top it off.
No wonder he�s always hungry, she thought to herself.
Just like his father. She ignored the sudden pang of sadness
that came with that thought, even though she wished more than
anything that he was with her to have this talk with Luis.
"Do you have a minute to spare for your mother?" Pilar asked,
knowing what he would say, but wanting to ask anyway.
He had already taken on so much, she would not
have felt right if she didn�t.
He flashed her a critical look. "For you, anytime!"
He noticed the nervous look on her face and took her hand.
"What is it, Mama?"
Pilar decided to get right to the point. "I found these in your
room today." She pulled a stack of papers out of a drawer
and laid them on the table. "They were in your garbage can."
Luis looked at the stack for a moment before answering. "Yeah, I know."
"Why did you throw them away?" Pilar asked, taking the stack
of acceptance letters in her hand.
"Because I�m not going to college," Luis answered. He took the
stack from Pilar and began to tear them in half.
Pilar grabbed Luis� arm to stop him.
"Luis, I will not let you give up this kind of opportunity," Pilar said.
"You have been offered scholarships from every Ivy League
school in the country! Why would you not go to college?
If it is because of Beth..." she started, but Luis quickly cut her off.
"It has nothing to do with Beth," Luis said.
Luis ran his hand through his hair and sat down.
Pilar followed him, and sat down across from him.
"Look, mama, the fact if that we can�t afford it. If I go ahead
and start working, we can save some money, and maybe Theresa and Miguel
can go to college. My place isn�t off at some fancy school taking
classes I don�t need just to get a piece of paper that says I�m smart.
My place is here, with you." For emphasis, he took her hand again
and gave it a soft squeeze. "This is where I belong."
Pilar looked at her son for a moment. She could not help but admire
him in the way he had accepted this responsibility on himself, but she
was also not about to let him pass up the opportunity of a lifetime.
"Luis, please reconsider..."
"No, Mama. I�ve made up my mind. In fact, I�ve already decided
what I am going to do." Luis leaned forward, looking his mother in the
eye. "I�ve been talking to Hank�s brother, Sam, and he said that he
would get me what I needed to sign up with the Police Academy in
Boston. I�ll train there for a few weeks, and I�ll start working
for the Harmony Police Department as soon as I get home.
Sam says they�re looking for people. Plus Sam�s dad already
told me that I could work at the youth center as the Assistant
Director in my spare time.
Pilar looked at her son. It was obvious he had thought about
this, but she still did not want him to have to pass up
the chance to better himself. Finally, she decided there was no
use in fighting with him. "If only your father were here..."
she said under her breath.
Luis� face went from longing to anger.
"If Papa were here," Luis stated coldly, "we wouldn�t be having
this discussion, would we?"
It was only in moments like this when Luis was not able to hide
the fact that somewhere deep down, he was still a boy,
scared and hurt and angry.
Pilar�s heart went out to her son. She simply touched his cheek
lightly and gave him a weak smile before getting up from the table.
"Mama?"
"Yes?" Pilar asked.
Luis seemed to be in deep thought for a moment. "Why did you
think it was because of Beth?"
Pilar looked at her son. Finally realizing that he really did
not know, she sat down again. "Well, I thought perhaps you were
planning to go ahead and get married and start your own family."
She was surprised by Luis when he started laughing.
"C�mon, Mama," he said loudly. "Don�t tell me you�ve jumped on the
bandwagon with the rest of the town."
Pilar�s confused look was enough of an answer.
"Look, Beth�s a great girl, and I like her. I do. It�s just..."
"Just what?" Pilar prodded.
Luis looked at his hands for a moment. How do I explain this?
he asked himself. He and Beth had gone out throughout high
school, and had been dating no one but each other for almost
two years. He had heard the talk when they passed people.
He knew that everyone fully expected he and Beth to get married.
Even Beth had begun to drop little hints to let him know that
she would say yes, if only he would ask her. He had not yet
been able to tell Beth how he felt, but he decided that his
mother may help him sort out his feelings.
"She�s not the one."
"But you�ve been dating for so long," Pilar said, not quite understanding.
"Yeah, I know, and we�ve had a good time, but Beth is my friend.
Honestly, I don�t think I could ever see myself marrying her,"
Luis said. He got up and began pacing around the room.
"There�s something missing between me and Beth.
She doesn�t get to me. I want someone that I can�t wait to
see when I come home. I want someone that will drive me crazy.
She�s got to have something, something special.
I�m not sure exactly what it is, but when I find it I�ll know.
Until then, I�m in no rush to get married.
Besides, it wouldn�t be fair to any woman to marry them at this point
in my life.
My family comes first. So you see, Mama," Luis finished, flashing
a killer smile, "you are the main woman in my life." He walked behind
her and gave her a strong hug before walking into his room.
That was the first day Pilar had known her son had become a man.
Present time...
Pilar forced herself back, and walked to Beth. "I�m sorry.
I didn�t mean to..."
"That�s okay," Beth said, trying to gain her composure.
"I know you didn�t mean for me to hear that, but it�s okay. Really."
"Speaking of Luis, where is he?" Sam asked, suddenly realizing
that this was the first time he had not seen him at Sheridan�s
side since she was brought in.
"I told him that I would stay here for a few minutes while he went
home. He mentioned having to meet with an FBI agent today," Pilar said.
"Yeah, he told me that, too," Beth added. "What�s going on Chief?"
Just as Sam was about to speak, Luis rounded the corridor, and Sam
motioned that he would tell them later. Sam was happy to see Luis
looking much better after a shower and changing clothes,
though there was still no mistaking that he was at the end of his rope.
"Hey, Luis," Sam said. "Have you eaten yet?"
"No, but I will in a little while," Luis replied, sounding stronger than he had in days.
"Well, you seem to be feeling better," Sam noted hopefully.
He was rewarded with a small smile.
"Yeah, actually, I am." Luis looked at Sheridan for a moment.
"I woke up this morning somehow knowing that everything will be alright."
Sam looked around at the faces of everyone standing in front of him.
Beth was looking at her feet. Pilar was just looking at her
son with a strange kind of understanding.
He decided anything that made things easier for Luis could not hurt.
"Has Agent Michaels shown up yet?"
"No, but you know them. They come and go as they please, stepping
over whoever or whatever they have to. I hope Ethan knew what he
was doing when he picked this guy," Luis concluded. "You never know
what to expect from them."
No one noticed the blonde woman a few feet away who had been watching
and listening to everything they had said. Before Chase could
walk up to the group, a weak sound came from Sheridan�s room.
Luis ran into Sheridan�s room and was shocked when he was
saw that her eyes were open .
"Sheridan?" Luis sat on the edge of her bed and took her hand.
"Don�t try to talk. You�ve been in the hospital,
and you have a tube down your throat to help you breathe.
I�ll get the doctor." He motioned for someone to get the doctor,
but Sam had already gone for him.
Sheridan�s frightened expression changed to relief as she looked at Luis.
"Do you know who I am?" Luis asked. Sheridan gave him a weak nod that she did.
"Okay," Luis breathed, relieved. "Just hold on. Everything�s going to be fine."
Sheridan finally looked at the rest of the people in the room.
Chase, who had walked to the door of the room, was the only one
that noticed Sheridan�s gaze fixed on Beth.
TO: CHAPTER 7
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