Learning By Heart
By: April
Disclaimer: The Passions characters featured in this story are the
property
of NBC, Passions, and its writers.
If it weren't for these people, I
could
not have come up with this story. This one is really more or less just
dedicated to the time once Sheridan gets to Paris that was not on the
show,
what could have happened, etc. The story gets much more creative in
the next
chapter.
Enjoy! From April
LEARNING BY HEART
Chapter One
'Why do I still miss you so much?'
Sheridan admonished herself again for thinking of Luis. She knew
that
she should not think about him, or any other man, for that matter.
"I'm through with men!" she told herself sternly. "Never again
will a
man like Luis hurt me. And I'll be damned if I give him the
satisfaction of
pining over him!"
"Mademoiselle?" Sophie asked, shaking Sheridan from her thoughts.
She
had not realized she had spoken aloud.
"Yes?"
"I do not mean to disturb you Miss Crane, but I could not help
overhearing. This Luis meant a great deal to you, no?" Sophie asked
quietly. She had always been fascinated with American men.
Sheridan cursed herself again for being so transparent. She turned
to
the woman in front of her, not just a maid, but a woman who had over
many
years and as many broken hearts become a close friend. Sheridan just
smiled
as much as her aching heart allowed.
"Yes, he did, but it's over now. It's time to move on," she stated
flatly, hoping it sounded more genuine than it felt.
"Tell me about him." It was more of a question than a request, but
it
caught Sheridan off guard none the less.
Before Sheridan could
protest,
Sophie continued. "I have seen you hurt before, but I have never seen
you so
sad. Even when you left Paris last year when you found out that
Jean-Luc was
not only using you, but cheating on you as well. Until now I have
always
felt that your pride was hurt more than your heart, but now..." Sophie
let
the sentence hang in the air.
She could see in Sheridan's eyes that
she had
struck a nerve. "I am sorry, Miss Crane," she said. "I should not
have..."
"No, Sophie, wait. You're right," Sheridan admitted quietly. "With
every
other man I have ever known, I always kept my guard up. Even with
Jean-Luc.
Even after he asked me to marry him, I still never was able to let him
into
my heart completely. I just never realized it until I met Luis." Just
saying his name brought a rush of emotions that threatened to swallow
her
soul.
Perhaps sharing what happened with someone would help her to
begin
healing. She walked over to her purse and pulled out a picture. She
handed
it to Sophie.
"And the man is?" Sophie asked, smiling slyly as she gazed at the
picture.
"Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald."
Sophie tried to keep her first impression masked, but Sheridan
could tell
that the young woman, who always fantasized about having a foreign
lover, was
absolutely speechless.
"This is the man you left in America?"
Sheridan smiled sadly to herself. 'I know all too well just how
sexy
Luis is in that picture.'
Finally Sheridan forced herself to look at the picture again.
There was
nothing special about the picture itself. Luis was standing beside
her, the
plaque he had made for her in his hand.
He was looking at her with his
gorgeous brown eyes, those eyes that just days before made her feel
like he
was not just gazing at her, but into her very soul. His other hand was
casually tucked into the pocket a pair of jeans that looked like they
had
been custom-made to fit his extrordinary form. His black sweater
hugged his
chest tightly enough that it was obvious that a well toned body was
beneath
it.
"Believe me, no matter how good he looks on the outside, he is
nothing
but a double-talking bastard," she stated coldly, almost as much to
remind
herself as to remind Sophie.
"It was love at first sight, no?" Sophie asked softly. 'I have
never
even met him, and I think I am in love,' she thought to herself. Her
mind
was brought back to reality suddenly by an unusual sound.
Sheridan was almost choking with laughter. The shocked look on
Sophie's
face made Sheridan calm herself down.
"Actually, under the
circumstances we
met," and for the first time since she left Harmony, she let all of
the
bitter-sweet memories come rushing back.
*******************************************************
An empty box of tissue lay on the table in front of Sheridan.
The
sunny
afternoon had long since turned to a milky twilight. Sheridan had
offered
Sophie to chance to leave at certain breaks in her story (most of which
were
times that Sheridan found most difficult to talk about), but Sophie had
refused every time. Now she looked as if she was in a trance,
replaying the
scenes Sheridan had described for her so vividly in her head.
Finally
Sophie, who had cried at every point Sheridan had broken down, now
looked at
her with red-rimmed eyes. Sheridan, knowing that she looked no better
but
too exhausted to care, smiled sadly at her friend.
"And now I'm here, keeping you all hours of the night to talk about
a man
that should mean nothing to me," she concluded softly.
"Forgive me, Miss Crane, but I think that you have made a terrible
mistake." If Sophie had gotten up and slapped her smartly across the
face,
Sheridan would have been less surprised.
"W-What?!?" Sheridan demanded hotly, suddenly feeling betrayed by
her
companion. 'How dare she presume to judge my actions, especially after
what I
just told her!'
"You are in love with him." It was not a question, and Sophie did
not
wait for an answer. "From what you have told me, he was also in love
with
you."
Before Sheridan could protest, Sophie drove on, determined to
get her
point across to her friend. "Why did he not try to charm you when he
met
you? Surely he could have, but instead he chose to keep his distance,
just
as you did. Why did he not want you involved in finding his father if
he
wanted to use you to that end? Why did he turn down so many obvious
opportunities to benefit from you if he was only interested in using
you?
And why, Sheridan," Sophie asked , grabbing Sheridan's hand for
emphasis and
looking at her with determination, "why did he choose to save your life
not
once, but twice at the risk of losing his only chance to find out what
happened to his father? If that was what he wanted to accomplish by
manipulating you, why did he risk so much of himself for you?"
Sheridan had no answers to give. She simply sat frozen on the
couch,
trying to ignore the questions that had been going through her mind all
along. The same questions that Sophie had said aloud. She thought
back to
the day of the party, when Luis gave her the plaque for finishing her
community service. She had been so angry that she had not let herself
notice
how confused Luis seemed.
When he had stopped at her cottage the next
day,
she had felt that he wanted to know what happened, and she knew she
would
have told him had Julian not come when he did.
"No!" Sheridan cried aloud.
Sophie had left just as quietly as she
came,
and Sheridan found herself alone, more alone than she had ever been
before.
"It doesn't matter if he knows I know what he did," she reminded
herself.
"The point is, HE DID IT! I saw him, I heard him, and no matter what
happened before that night, in the end, Luis is nothing more than a
two-faced user, and the fact that I am still in love with him does not
change
that! "
Just as the words came out of her mouth, Sheridan realized that she
was
not alone.
The hair on the back of her neck suddenly stood on end.
'It can't be, please God, it's not possible, it's not him, it's
not, it's
not...'
She knew who it was, even before she turned around to see those
eyes
that, as before, were searching her soul. And this time the fire in
them was
burning with an intensity, a desire that she could not have prepared
for,
could not have imagined, even in her most erotic dream.
"The fact that you are in love with me changes EVERYTHING," Luis
whispered.
To Be Continued...
TO: CHAPTER 2
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