| Learning to Love Her Prologue |
| The smell nauseated him. It was the smell of death and cleaning solutions that permeated every brightly lit hospital he knew of. The sea foam green walls did little to sooth his struggling mind as he fidgeted in the plush, plastic covered hospital chair. Nurses and doctors rushed by, their arms full of charts for patients in different rooms, but yet the door to his wife�s room was closed and one solitary doctor was in there examining her again. Sighing, Luis sank deeper into the chair and looked up at the cracked plaster of the ceiling. She had been sick for a long time now, two years at least. They had tried everything in the books to cure her, but nothing seemed to even begin to cure the cancer. The doctor said it was like leukemia, acute myeloid or something like that, he didn�t care to remember. He couldn�t believe that modern medicine couldn�t cure his wife. What good was it all? Twisting his platinum wedding band on his finger, Luis remembered falling in love with her fourteen years ago. He had lost his heart at the ripe old age of fourteen and married Beth not long after. She was the love of his life and nothing would change that. Closing his eyes, he could see her smiling brown eyes and her thick, long brown hair that framed her face just right. When the light caught her hair, it shimmered and seemed almost red in places. It had been hard to find a wig that same color when she lost her hair from the chemo. �Ahem?� Luis popped up, his eyes opening and meeting the sad gray-blue ones of the oncologist that was handling Beth�s case. He knew; it didn�t take a genius to see it in his eyes that Beth wasn�t going to survive this time. Luis immediately wished he hadn�t sent his mother and father home; he needed them now more than anything in the universe. �Mr. Lopez-Fitzgerald, we have stabilized your wife, but it doesn�t look good�� He hadn�t heard those words before; usually they were so willing to tell him that his wife would make it. How was he going to tell his ten-year-old and six-year-old daughters that their mother wasn�t going to survive this time? Samantha, or Sami, would understand; she was just like her mother, able to read her father like a book, but Hope wouldn�t. She wouldn�t understand why her mother wasn�t going to return this time. �So the prognosis is bleak?� Luis� voice sounded strange to him. As a lawyer and then the District Attorney, he had learned well to speak in a manner that made a jury and a judge seek what was best for his client. He had become quite adept at masking feelings, but this voice was new to even his ears. �You could say that,� the doctor replied honestly. �I think it would be best to prepare your children, Mr. Lopez-Fitzgerald. I don�t believe your wife will last much longer.� Luis simply nodded, looking at the doorway to her room. How was he ever going to get through life without her? �Thank you, Dr. Patterson.� �I wish there was more to be done, Mr. Lopez-Fitzgerald. We�re all very sad to see her suffer in this way, but she won�t survive the way she is going. I�m sorry,� he turned on his heels and left the waiting room, leaving Luis to the cold silence of the sterile hallway. Stepping outside of the building and into the setting afternoon sunlight, Luis pulled out his cell and looked bleary eyed at the device. Fingering the small numbers, he knew that what he was about to do would be the hardest thing in the world. He was going to call his mother and father, who were watching his girls, and give them the news. Then, he would beg for them to come see his wife one last time. Flipping open the phone, the small white buttons glowed green and he pressed the digits he knew so well. It had been their home for as long as he could remember and the phone number hadn�t changed even once. Pressing the numbers with the pads of his fingers, he only hoped he hit the right ones as the tears continued to blur his vision. �Hello, Mama. It�s Luis. She�s dying Mama, Beth is dying.� ~*~~*~ Rain fell heavily against their umbrellas as Luis and the girls struggled to stay dry beside the open grave. Hope hadn�t understood; he knew she wouldn�t and now she clung to him, her eyes blank and distant. Something he knew wouldn�t change soon. Beside him, Sami listened to the pattern of the rain as the priest tried to speak above the pounding water. She had understood. She knew what was happening and she hated it. Worse than that, she had understood that they hadn�t made it to the hospital before their mother passed away. They hadn�t been allowed the chance to say goodbye. Luis pulled her closer, watching as the crystal tears began to fill her brown eyes. She was trying so hard to be strong for her father and Luis knew that. He knew she hadn�t wanted to let him see her cry; little did she know that he had watched her cry from her bedroom door every night for the last three days. Surveying the crowd around the grave, Luis caught the eyes of his family and friends, but many looked away quickly. His pain was all too evident in his own eyes and they couldn�t deal with that. They were all there, all the people he had leaned on for support over the last two years. His best friend Hank stood nearby with Sam, both looking at the casket as if they expected it to move. Luis wished it would. Shaking his head, he moved on, looking at his sister and her boyfriend, who would have ever thought his sixteen-year-old sister would be dating Ethan Crane of Raven Hill? Ironic how much the Cranes and the Lopez-Fitzgeralds supported the match; after all, Luis had quite a bit of clout in the circles the Cranes ran in. He wanted to continue scanning the group, but his eyes settled on one woman he wouldn�t ever have expected at the funeral for his beloved wife. Her blue eyes met his hazel ones and even held the gaze. What was written there was more than sympathy, it was almost love. He shook his head, that wasn�t possible, Sheridan Crane couldn�t love him and he would never be able to love her. Still, her gaze held his from across the way and Assistant DA Sheridan Crane never let her stare falter. Even after her moved to place a handful of dirt onto her lowered casket, he could find her eyes still pinned on him. When he placed a kiss to his fingers and then to the tombstone, he felt her eyes on his back, watching his move. While the rest of the supporters rushed to their cars to get out of the downpour, leaving him alone with his grief, Sheridan Crane was still there with her sky blue eyes watching him intently. He passed her on the way to his car, paying his partner no mind. He wouldn�t let those blue eyes bother him any longer, but they did. They bothered him even in his dreamless sleep that night as he cried for his beloved wife whom he would never hold again. |