(Hiatus ENSUES. A glut of DISEASED, SICK, AND GENERALLY UNHAPPY Justin 'fics POUR FORTH LIKE PUSS OUT OF A GANGRENOUS SORE.)
Author I will COMPLETELY DISREGARD Brian's many self-esteem issues and the obvious references in canon to his body image paranoia, and WRITE about Justin GETTING AN EATING DISORDER! Nevermind that the vastness of my KNOWLEDGE of the subject is about as DEEP AS A PETRI DISH!
(She CRANKS OUT NUMEROUS CHAPTERS OF DRIVEL. Outraged authors BEMOAN THIS, but their constructive criticism gets SHOT DOWN BY PLEBES who EAT IT UP like Oprah at THANKSGIVING DINNER.)
Brian I like to feel Justin's ribs RUB AGAINST MY DICK when we have sex - it really PROVES THAT HE'S GOT A LOT OF SELF CONTROL! Also, something tells me all that BARFING does wonders for his LACK OF A GAG REFLEX!
(It DOES. Meanwhile, Jennifer proves to be a very SUPPORTIVE MOTHER.)
Jennifer Even though my son looks like a SURVIVOR OF A NAZI CONCENTRATION CAMP, I will constantly tell him he's FAT so he can keep his MODEL-SLIM FIGURE!
Brian Don't listen to her, Justin ... even though you're kind of HOT when you're EMACIATED.
Justin OMG, fuck you all.
THE END