Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you
and do nothing all day
long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the
rabbit sat on the
ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden,
a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing,
you must be sitting
very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to
be able to get to the
top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I
haven't got the energy. "Well,
why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"
replied the bull. "They're
packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump
of dung and found that
it actually gave him enough strength to reach the
first branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he
reached the second branch.
Finally after a fortnight, there he
was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he
was promptly spotted by
a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
Bullshit might get you to the
top, but it won't keep
you there.
Lesson Number Three
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted
to be Boss. The brain
said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole
body's responses and
functions." The feet said, "We should be Boss as we
carry the brain about
and get him to where he wants to go." The hands
said, "We should be the
Boss because we do all the work and earn all the
money." And so it went on
and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until
finally the asshole
spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the
asshole being the Boss.
So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and
refused to work. Within
a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands
clenched, the feet twitched,
the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain
fevered. Eventually they
all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so
the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss
just sat and passed out
the shit!
Management Lesson:
You don't need brains to be a
Boss - any asshole will do.
Lesson Number Four
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It
was so cold, the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While
it was lying there, a
cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the
frozen bird lay there in the
pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it
was. The dung was actually
thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy and
soon began to sing for
joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came
to investigate. Following
the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
pile of cow dung and
promptly dug him out and ate him!
Management Lessons:
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!
-- Cntributed by : Saptarshi Basu