I hated it. And when I say I hated it, I mean I really HATED it. I was perfectly fine with them changing the book, I even read an interview with Anne Hathaway where she explained why the plot had been changed, so I wanted to like this movie. I really did....
We start off with the beginning. Eric Idle in his genius derived a chuckle from me when he rode in on a ancient bicycle like he was a delivery boy and did narration. Thank you Eric, we know you did your best. Then we progress to Ella's birth. Awww! Darn it that baby is cute! But wait, why are Mandy and Ella's mom forcing out their lines in such an obvious way? This can't be the same woman who made me cry during Good Will Hunting!? And why is Lucinda dressed like a hooker? Yes, Luci, we figured out you were a ditz with your first sentence, no need to emphasize it. Overall the beginning was rushed way too fast, it was as if the director wanted to remind us he was on a time schedule.
Once we reached sixteen year old Ella, I thought things were improving. Anne Hathaway charmed me and played her role very well. Her sisters, on the other hand, made me want somehow climb onto the screen and kill them. They weren't evil, they were just annoying and two halves of one idiot. I know that Lucy Punch could have done better if she had taken the role more seriously, it would have made her seem less of a lunatic and more evil, the way she was meant to be. I cringed everytime she and Hugh Dancy were in the same shot, it was just painful!
And poor Parminder, she must have drawn the short straw in this movie. A grand total of two seconds was spent explaining her character, and even then it left the non-book readers completely clueless. All we were given were given to work with was that she was a minority and that she and Ella were probably friends since they were standing in the same shot together. I was completely heartbroken that she was never given a chance to develop her character. It certainly would have made Ella's forced dismissal of her a lot more painful to watch (although Hathaway did a particularly good job with that scene).
I think I had better wrap things up before I get carried away.
Things I liked.
Hathaway and Dancy: Awesome acting! Though they weren't given much to work with, what they got they milked for all it was worth. When Ella was in pain, Anne made sure you could feel it. I was actually in suspense when Char was holding her and she was struggling not to plunge a knife into his back. Dancy pulled off his role of prince Charmont very well. He was a good mix of a well-meaning yet mislead person.
The musical number at the giants wedding: I couldn't help but grin while Anne sang her heart out to "Can anybody find me somebody to love", even though it was cheesy it was totally fun to watch. Anne has such a good voice, she really needs to use it more often.
The proposal: It was really a lovely setting and Hathaway really looked like she was going through quite a bit of pain. I was enjoying the suspense until Carey Elwes made his entrance.
Things I didn't like (and trust me it's a lot more than I'm going to list).
Everybody else: I'll say it again, if some of these people had played them more seriously they would have been freakier and made for a more suspensful plot. Elwes shocked the heck outta me. Since when did he go about playing pshychotic morons? His villian was so pathetic I almost couldn't watch. I prayed that Minnie Driver could make something out of what she was given, but alas, she made me long for the wise old Mandy rather than the bumbling one.
The version of the curse: Save for the times when she was crying (dismissing Areida and breaking the curse) there was no way the audience was going to register that she had no choice during an order. When someone ordered her around (mind you, with a lot of ways to manipulate them) she just snapped to and showed no resistance at all. They didn't even bother to explain what amounts of pain she would have to go through to refuse.
Extrememly stupid potty jokes: Ogres with plumbers butt, babies peeing, Giants farting, I wanted to puke. What a cheap way to get laughs. This movie is especially catered to those under twelve.
The elves: Ugh, don't get me started.....
Useless scenes: Okay, being the seventeen year old girl that I am, I have to admit that it was nice seeing Hugh Dancy with his shirt off. But what irks me is that the scene was played for the one and only reason of seeing his shirt off. Had they taken it out it wouldn't have affected the story in the slightest. Sometimes these scenes are good, as they give you a break from the movie, but when there are way more than one you start to get a little concerned over whether the director had enough material to work with.
Hesten the Snake: Thank God he didn't speak often or I would have to have had to compare him to Jar Jar Binks. My first thought was, "So, Edgar has a talking snake? And nobody cares? Are they not even going to explain why the snake is there at all?" This is where a little thing called transition and cohesion that would have been helpful. For those of you who don't know what those is, transition is something that links scenes together while cohesion makes the plot feel like one solid piece rather than a bunch of scenes just poorly thrown together.
I'm going to stop here. Again, please decide for yourselves! I'm fully aware that this is a kids movie, but I've seen a fair share of kids movies in my time and that was one of the worst. I feel horrible giving this review on a site dedicated to the movie, but I can't help but be honest here. I felt ripped off and once more, I felt that my favorite children's book had been thrown aside as if it were nothing. I'm going to go pick it up now, read, and hopefully no images from the movie will come to mind. Happy movie watching!