All the secrets we have shared

Have moved to a couple better paired

So if he impales himself on javelin or spike

I will try my best to be the perfect lookalike

And if he wants to be smart

And enter a property quiz

Every weed in the gardens mine

But the lawnmower’s his

Every weed in the gardens mine

But the lawnmowers his

Now you’ve found someone new

May I watch him do what I used to do

So if he dies an ugly death or even if he faints

I’ll be there at the window with my face pressed up against

Maybe I shouted too loud

Maybe you were blissfully deaf

But I hope he’s a better sport

Than he was a ref

I hope he likes to fly

And is a good host to every guest

Cause there’s less chance of dying in a crash

Than being bored to death

Yes there’s less chance of dying in a crash

Than being bored to death

Now you’ve found someone new