In the unnoticed expanses of New York (meaning anything outside of NYC, and maybe Albany), there is a city called Piemess. And now, just an hour before classes begin at PM High, we zoom in on one person who�s just waking up. Jake's mother: Wake up or you'll be late. Jake(Spy Guy, a sophomore): But I'm busy defending the earth in my gundam�mumble� Jake's mother: If you don't get up right now, I'll cut a switch. Jake: But I'm tiiiiiiired. Jake's mother: Get up or no anime for a week. Jake snaps awake. Jake: Jesus, I'm up! He grumbles as he pulls himself to the bathroom, where the two Mini-Jakes appear on his shoulders. Jake A(in squeaky voice): You get no respect from these people. You should do something about it. Jake B(in squeakier voice): It's sad; you still get more respect from your mother than your classmates. Jake: Shut up. 7:15 � At PM High, Math Team James(Jacehan, a senior): So�okay, it's our first meeting, so we need to fill out some forms to get money for the club from the school. Steven(Yazinka, a sophomore): Ha! We don't need those fascist bastards. Bureaucracy and government only tie us down, set us in the molds of society. It's anarchy we need! James: O�kay� so, how do we get the money? Steven: How about a bake sale? James: And what would we sell at Ye Olde Bake Sale, may I ask? Steven: What else but pie? At that moment, Chris(Dark Penguin, a junior) bursts through the door. Chris: Did someone say pie? James: Yes! Pie for PM High! He looks like he'd kill for some. Steven grabs a claymore. 7:30 � On the bus Wil(a junior) is sitting, listening to Enya on his CD player while trying to read some lame book James recommended. He looks out the window to see a bear walking down the street. Wil: Oh ****, Baron Bear broke out again. He sighs and goes back to his book. 7:50 - Outside the School Principal Veasey, to Animal Control Dept. over the phone: Yes, I'm afraid our mascot is loose again. What do you mean I shouldn't sound the alarm? No, I haven't ever heard 'Warning' by 'Green Day.' Is that some kind of Rock If-and-only-if Roll? Up yours too, mister. Principal Veasey(through a megaphone): Everyone remain calm; there is nothing to worry about. Baron Bear is on the loose again, and yes, he does have a history of mauling random people with a sick gleam in his eyes, but that is no reason to panic. Simon (Bloobies Man, a senior): Umm, I'd hate to interrupt, Mr. Veasey, but I think panicking would be a great idea. At that moment, Mark(BUM, a sophomore) and Alex(HeyDude, a sophomore) walk by. Mark: But he really does look like my uncle! Alex: No, you're uncle is much hairier than the bear. Simon: Wait, you guys saw Baron Bear? Mark: Yea, he's down a block, knocking over a bus. I think I saw Wil trying to calm him down with the soothing platitudes of Gaelic new-age music. Principal Veasey: Damnit, if we don't stop this soon it is soooo going in the evening paper. Wait�that's free publicity... quickly, act niggardly! 7:52 - At Baron Bear's cage DIM(a sophomore) stands around grinning evilly, holding the open door. DIM: A-ha, the first step to taking over Piemess, and then the world, is set in motion. Soon all the tomagatchis will be mine. 7:55 - At the bus Z (ZZTMan, a sophomore) walks up to Baron Bear. Z: Ni! Ni! I note that you are not cringing in agony. Ni! Wil: Z, you're confusing Monty Python with reality again. Z walks off deflated. Wil: Now, Baron Bear, what're you doing, man? Don't maul these guys, they're just bystanders. Maul The Man. Baron Bear looks at him oddly. Wil: Yeah. The Man is waiting by your cage. Baron Bear looks at him oddly. Wil: Plus, right by the cage are some no-good vandals. Go maul them and be on the side of justice. Baron Bear runs off. Wil: Well, that's taken care of. Wil walks the rest of the way to the school. 8:00 - First Period, Math II Kate(Peach, a sophomore) starts unpacking her books from her bag, including the penguin pencil and the pie-shaped eraser. She then rapidly starts doing the homework that's due, since she is a member of the church or Procrastinatism and put it off until now. Mrs. Veasey, the teacher, walks in and starts writing on the board. Immediately behind her through the door is Brandon(Pooty Boy, a sophomore), looking at her all condescendingly as he walks to his desk and sits down next to Jordan (Azumarillman, a sophomore), who immediately comments on the lack of shine-collecting involved in the previous night's assignment. He looks at the board. Jordan: Excuse me, Mrs. Veasey�I think you forgot the comma right over there�That should really be a semi-commatic preposition. Kate turns around and hits him on the side of the head. Kate: Do you want us to kill you. Jordan: Gah! Question mark, woman! At that moment Jake runs into class. Jake: Am I late? Mrs. Veasey: Yes. I'll have to mark you down. Jake: Are you sure you want to do that? I am rich in swords and other anime-ish things at home. Mrs. Veasey: Are you threatening me? Do I have to send you to dean Cyric? Jake mutters 'no' and rushes to his seat, which curiously lacks both heat-seeking missiles and gatling guns. 8:30 -English 1 Mr. Wally West is droning on about some Greek mythology. Nick(Ocarinakid, a freshman) is hitting on both Daisy(daisy, a freshman) and Alisha(Nintendo Queen, a freshman). Nick: So, what are you guys doing this Friday? I think I might be available to�"show" you a few things. Daisy: So you want to show 'guys' a few things? Tee-hee. Nick: Well don't you two? C'mon, my place is great for showing. Daisy smacks Nick. Alisha smacks Nick. He turns back to pay attention to class. |
| Episode 1 � Fourth Week of School, Monday, 7:00-9:00 AM |
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