/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
365Days
/*************************************/
Hi, Guys!
During my school days I use to come up with this excuse every time my
parents told me to study.........
If My Calculation Is Not Wrong:-
DAYS IN A YEAR = 365
SUNDAYS = 52 DAYS
SUNDAYS ARE MEANT FOR REST
DAYS LEFT = 313 DAYS
SUMMER VACATIONS = 60 DAYS
WEATHER IS VERY HOT, SO IT IS DIFFICULT TO STUDY
DAYS LEFT = 253 DAYS
8 HOURS OF DAILY SLEEP = 122 DAYS
SLEEP IS NECESSARY
DAYS LEFT = 131
1 HOUR DAILY FOR PLAY = 15 DAYS
ITS GOOD FOR HEALTH
DAYS LEFT = 116 DAYS
2 HOURS DAILY FOR FOOD = 30 DAYS
CHEW THE FOOD PROPERLY DON'T CARE FOR TIME
DAYS LEFT = 86 DAYS
EXAMINATION DAYS IN A YEAR = 30 DAYS
GIVING EXAMS IS NECESSARY
DAYS LEFT = 56 DAYS
WINTER VACATIONS = 25 DAYS
WEATHER IS COLD IT'S DIFFICULT TO STUDY
DAYS LEFT = 31 DAYS
OTHER HOLIDAYS = 20 DAYS
THESE HOLIDAYS ARE TO ENJOY
DAYS LEFT = 11 DAYS
ILLNESS ATLEAST ONCE A YEAR = 8 DAYS
BECAUSE OF ILLNESS STUDY IS DIFFICULT
DAYS LEFT = 3 DAYS
RESULT DAYS = 3 DAYS
GOING AND TAKING RESULT IS NECESSARY
DAYS LEFT =0 DAYS
SO TELL ME WHERE IS THE TIME TO STUDY
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
BGita
/*************************************/
Bhagvad Gita
EnjoyMaadi...
Arjun being disillusioned & Krishna trying to clear that
disillusionment...
Krishna : Try to respect the e-mails of your elders, Arjun.
Arjun : But Vasudev, how dare I send junk mails to my honourable elders
who are logged on honourable domain?
Krishna : Paarth, at this moment they neither are your friend nor your
foes. They are mere mail-users. So follow your Net-dharma. Logon and send
dozens of junk mails. This is your Karma and this alone is your Dharma.
Arjun : Hey Murari ! After seeing all this I feel like resigning from
Software Industry.
Krishna : Bandhu, it seems you are caught in a viscous circle of Maaya. In
this material world you have none and you are commited to none. Junk mails
have existed before you came to this world and shall remain long after you
are gone. Rise above this Maaya and perform your duty. Just keep firing
junk mails.
Arjun : But Devaki Nandan...........!
Krishna : .....Victory or failure is not in your hands. So stop pondering
about results. Don't waste your knowledge on the junk shastra bestowed by
your Guru Dronacharya.
Arjun : Hey Keshav, how is junk mail related to the system ?
Krishna : Junk mail is just junk mail. It has no connection with Hardware.
However, it is another aspect that it overloads the system....fills up the
hard disk.. but you are not supposed to worry about it. Listen Kunti
putra, the way Aatma leaves one physical body and moves onto another,
likewise these junk mails move system to system.
Arjun : How can one define junk mail ?
Krishna : Neither fire can burn it.., nor air can dry it..neither it can
be conqured nor it can be defeated. He who sends junk mails cannot be
looked down upon even by Mahadev..Junk mails are immortal.
Arjun : Hey Narayan ! Now all my fandaas on junk mail are crystal clear.
You have opened my eyes Yashoda Nandan, else I would have lost myself in
Maaya and read all the junk mails myself.
...............MAHAAABHAAAAARAT............
************************
Years have passed since then, Generations have come and gone,seasons have
cycled, Technology advanced, but Junk mails remain. So , go on, Contribute
something to the History by hitting that Forward button yet again to all.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
CyberShayari
/*************************************/
Here are Some Cyber-Shayari.
Jo sadiyaon se hota aaya hai
woh repeat kar doonga
tu naa mili to tujhe
Shift delete kar doonga
/****************************************************/
company kee ladkiyaan sunder hain
aur lonely hain
problem hai ki bus voh
read only hain
/****************************************************/
shayad mere pyar ko taste
karna bhool gaye
dil ko aisa cut kiya
ke paste karna bhool gaye
/****************************************************/
woh samajhte hain dil tod diya
to hum dead hain
woh nahin jaante ki is dil main
aur kitne thread hain
/****************************************************/
tumhare samne hain itne sample
kabhi hamein bhi pick karo
hamare pyar ke icon pe
kabhi to click karo
/****************************************************/
roz subha hum karte hai
itne pyar se unhe good morning
woh humhe ghoor kar dekhte hain
jaise 0 error but 5 warning
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Dil Chahta Hai
/*************************************/
Dil Chahta Hai
Hi Guys & Gals,
Here are a few things that should be noticed and learnt from the movie Dil Chahta Hai.
* Freaking out and enjoying life doesn't need drugs or cigarettes.
* There are relations apart from bf/gf, marriage, siblings,friendship or sex
that can be very emotional and true which is beyond the understanding of many
ppl.
* Improving ur imperfections after you realize it, always take some time.
* You always don't need to show or prove your gf how much u love or care about
her, which can sound very boring and finally u r dumped.
* Do not be afraid of others ,always think that others r afraid of
you.(Australian Beggar)
* You don't need a cell fone while u r studying in college or freaking out doing
nothing.Once u fall into business or job u may need it.
* What do you think about a 3d photograph ?? True friends can understand :)
* Bossy natured girls need a kick on their butt, and such girls can never spoil
the relation of two true friends.
* Girls should not get carried away just by the sense of humor or manners of the
person. Try to know how a$$hole he can be, and if u still have feelings for him
try to improve him.
* Short hair is cool !!
* Metal is scary and Trance is happy. and finally..
* No onez purrfect :)
Cool movie... never expected Indian director to make such a realistic movie,
which must have definitely given a major inferiority complex to other directors
like yash chopra or suraj bharjatiya who r still into the virtual world
including some Hollywood directors.
So what do you think ????????????????
ENJOY THE LIFE MAN .............
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Engineer Joke
/*************************************/
Take One Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit." *****************************************************
Comprehending Engineers - Take Two To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
****************************************************
Comprehending Engineers-Take Three A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude". The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greenskeeper. Let's have a word with him." [dramatic pause] "Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greenskeeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?" *****************************************************
Comprehending Engineers-Take Four There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multimillion dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine to work but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and stated, "This is where your problem is". The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly: One chalk mark $1 Knowing where to put it $49,999 It was paid in full and the engineer retired again in peace. ************************************************************* Comprehending Engineers-Take Five What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets. ************************************************************ Comprehending Engineers-Take Six Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area? ************************************************************** Comprehending Engineers-Take Seven Normal people...believe if it ain't broke don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet." ************************************************************* Comprehending Engineers-Take Eight An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done.
************************************************************* Comprehending Engineers - Take Nine An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called up to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool. *************************************************************
Three Kentuckians go down to Mexico one night, get drunk, and wake up in jail only to find out that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before. The first one is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if he has any last words. He says: "I am from the Lexington School of Divinity and I believe in the Almighty power of God to intervene on behalf of the innocent." They throw the switch and nothing happens, so they figure God must not want this guy to die and they let him go. The second one is strapped in and gives his last words,"I am from the University of Kentucky School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent." They throw the switch and again nothing happens. They figure that the law is on this guy's side, so they let him go too. The last one is strapped in and says: "Well, I'm a University of Louisville electrical engineer graduate, and I'll tell you right now, you ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't connect them two wires". *************************************************************
A physicist, engineer and economist were stranded on a deserted island. One day some cans of food washed up onshore. Said the physicist, "If we place them in the hot sun long enough, the pressure in the cans should break open the seal and we can get to the food." "That will take too long," said the engineer. "I can sharpen a rock and get that thing opened." "Gentlemen, gentlemen, this is a much easier problem to solve than that," said the economist, holding out his hand. "...Assume can opener." *************************************************************
Here's one of my favorite.... It was the French Revolution. Three prisoners were being brought to the guillotine before a ragtag mob: an astronomer, a priest and an engineer. As the astronomer was led up to the platform, the executioner asked him, "Do you want to go face up or face down?" He replied, "Face up. I want to see the beauty of the heavens and the stars I've studied all my life as I die." So they put him in the guillotine and the executioner pulled the release lever. The blade dropped and WHACK! stopped just short of the astronomer's neck! The crowd went wild. "It's a miracle from God!" they shouted. "You must let him go!" So they released the astronomer, who went away free and unharmed. Resetting the guillotine, they brought up the next prisoner, the priest. Again, he was asked, "Do you want to go face up or face down?" The priest replied, "Face up. I want to look to the glory of my Father in heaven and worship Him as I die." So they set him in the guillotine and the executioner pulled the lever. The blade dropped and WHACK! stopped just short of the priest's neck! Again the crowd shouted! "It's another miracle! You must set him free!" So they released him, and he went away rejoicing. Finally, the engineer was led to the guillotine. The executioner asked, "Face up or face down?" "Face up. I want to see how the mechanism works." So they laid him down, and as the executioner put his hand on the release lever, the engineer shouted, "Wait! Wait! I see the problem! The rope is tangling on that pulley!"
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
enjoy commands
/*************************************/
Dear friends,
More in this age of computers!!
1) 5 minutes ago you were traveling to office at 80 mph. in your brand new
car. Now you are traveling to hospital at double the speed in an ambulance,
You wish there was 'undo' in life!
2) You are already late, and your key is missing, You wish there was 'find'
in life!
3) You are a bankrupt, after investing in some weird business, You wish
there was 'rebuild all' in life!
4) The train is so crowded that you cannot get anywhere near that nice
girl/boy at the other end, You wish there was 'zoom & view full screen' in
life!
5) After marriage you realize that there is bound to be a mismatch, You wish
there was an 'evaluation period' or at least a 'sample down load' or a
'demo version'!
6) One day you realize that you are turning bald, You wish there was 'cut
and paste' in life!
Thanks
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Enjoy this
/*************************************/
Hi Every one..
enjoy this....
A man who was previously a sailor, was very aware that ships are addressed as "she" and "her". He often
wondered what gender computers should be addressed.
To answer that question, he set up two groups of computer experts. The first was comprised of women, and the second of men.
Each group was asked to recommend whether computers should be referred to in the feminine gender, or the masculine gender. They were asked to give 4 reasons for their recommendation.
The group of women reported that the computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer you could have had a better model.
The men, on the other hand concluded that Computers should be referred to in the feminine gender because:
1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
fanduDef
/*************************************/
College :
A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing.
Etc :
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Office :
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Ecstasy :
A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you Have never felt
before.
Committee :
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can
be done together.
Politician :
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
Smile :
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Optimist :
A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Pessimist :
A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, instead Of the first
letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
Diplomat :
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look
forward to the trip.
Classic :
A book which people praise, but do not read.
Dictionary :
The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
Miser :
A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Marriage :
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and woman gains her
master.
Father :
A banker provided by nature.
Rumour :
News that travels at the speed of sound.
Criminal :
A guy no different from the rest of us...except that he got caught.
Worry :
Interest paid on trouble before it falls due.
Boss :
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Philosopher :
A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Tears :
The hydraulic force by which masculine power is defeated by feminine power.
Experience :
The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb :
An invention to end all inventions.
Doctor :
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
Software Engineer :
One that is paid for sending and receiving such E-mails!
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Future MOVIE names
/*************************************/
Future MOVIE names
When we get INTO the GREAT INDIAN film industry -
* Meri hardisk tumhare paas hai
* Hum Hai Programmer Oracle ke
* Aao chat kare
* Programmer no 1
* Mera naam developer
* Badalate platforms
* Kahani Keyboard ki
* Java wale job le jayenge
* Hum aapke memory mein rahate hain
* Do(2) processor baarah(12) terminal
* Mera code chal gaya
* Har Din jo mail Karega
* Khel Virus ka
* Virus Aur Antivirus
* Network Ke Ush Paar
* Debugging koi Khel nahi
* Jis Desh mein Bill(gates) rahata Hai
* Raja ban gaya MCSE..!
* Client ek numbari, PROGRAMMER Dus Nambari
* Login karo sajana
* Interview ke Sapane
* Naukar PC ka
* Firewall (Border)
* Meri debugging
* DOWN to hona hi tha
* Tera Mera Program
* Partition (Deewar)
* 1942 - A Bug Story
* Kaho Na Virus Hai
Upcoming IT Movies:-
-----------------------------
Aao chat kare
Programmer no 1
Aaj ka body shopper
Programmer,recruiter aur bodyshoper
Badalate platforms
Kahani Keyboard ki
Memory aur hard disk
H1 ko aane do
Mouse ka gulam
Java wale job le jayenge
Skill apana apana
Hum aapke meomory mein rahate hain
Do pocessor barah terminal
Password Apana Apana
Hum Hai Programmer Oracle ke
Ek programmer do body shopper
H1 se Citizenship tak
Mera code chal gaya
Har Din jo mail Karega
Mera Resume Kora kagaj
Khel Virus ka
Virus Aur Antivirus
Programmer bane Bodyshopper
Network Ke Ush Paar
Billing aur Salary
Platform platform ki baat hai
Anjaana Bug
Aayi Production Ki Bela
Do Gateways
Debugging koi Khel nahi
Helpdesk ki Aatma (Ramasay bandhu ki Horror film)
Mera naam developer
Kaho na Bench hai
Crash kar di aaapne
Mein backup lunga
Pati patni aur computer
Deployment ki raat
Hum WALK-IN ja chuke sanam
Dhai akshar HRD ke
Jis Desh mein Bill(gates) rahata Hain
Hum To US jaayega
Aa ab KUCH KAAM kare
Raju ban gaya IT MAN..!
Dekhte Dekhte Connection mil Gaya
Iss Bench ki subah kab hogii
Client ek numbari PROGRAMMER Dus Nambari
Login karo sajana
Ek Thi vacancy
Interview ke Sapane
Naukar PC ka
Mera Resume Mera Skill
Hackers ke Site par Hacker
Experience Bina H1
Firewall( Diwar)
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Good equetion
/*************************************/
Good equetion
Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant. This constant is always zero
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Gujju
/*************************************/
Gujju
There was once a Gujarati living in USA called Navneet Bhai Patel, who
was involved in a car accident. At the hospital, when he awoke, he
called for the nurse to tell him what had happened to him. "I'm very
sorry, sir, but you were involved in a very bad car crash.""Car crash!
My Corola! Is my car all right?" he asked hysterically. "Sir, your car
was destroyed, but that is the least of your worries -you lost your left
arm in the crash, and we were unable to save it," She said
apologetically. "I lost my arm? My Seiko Watch! My Seiko!" "Sir, please
calm down. That is the least of your worries. You are in a very critical
condition, but all your family are here to see you." He asked for his
family to be called in. As they gathered around the bed, he called for
each of them by name. "Leena, are you here?" "I am here husband, and I
will never leave you." "Pritesh, are you here?" "I am here father, and I
will never leave you." "Kalpesh, are you here?" "I am here father, and I
will never leave you." "Kamlesh, my child, are you here?" "I am here
father, and I will never leave you." "Well," said Navneet Bhai
thoughtfully, "Leena, Pritesh, Kalpesh and Kamlesh are here.....if all
of you are here, WHO THE HELL IS IN THE SHOP...... ???"
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
how india survives..... only 2 people work
/*************************************/
how india survives..... only 2 people work
A small interesting statistic - Go On. and find the
truth...
The population of India is 100 crores. But did you
know that facts....
19 crores are retired.That leaves 81 crores to do
the work.
There are 25 crores in school, which leaves 56 crore
to do the work.
Of this there are 22 crores employed by the Central
Government, leaving 34 crores to do the work. (as
you know, government employees do not believe in
working)
4 crores are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 30
crores to do the work.
Take from the total the 20 crores people who work
for State Governments and that leaves 10 crores to
do the work. (They also do not work..)
Total unemployed are 8 crores that leaves 2 crores
to do the work.
At any given time there are 1.2 crore people in
hospitals, leaving 80,00,000 to do the work. Now,
there are 79,99,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.......You
and me !!!.
And currently you're sitting at your computer
reading mails.So I am the only person in our country
who is working.!!!!!!
And that's why India is surviving!!!
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Hum tum ek kamre me bund ho
/*************************************/
Film : Bobby ,
Song : Hum tum ek kamre me bund ho
Baahar se koi mail na aa sake,
Andar se koi data na ja sake
Socho kabhi aisa ho to kya ho,
Socho kabhi aisa ho to kya ho,
Hum tum ek Network pe logged ho,
Aur Server down ho jaye,
Resources se kaho ke NT chod de
Unix le aaye,
Hum tum ek Network pe logged ho,
Aur Server down ho jaye,
Aage hai 4GL ka mela,
Baba mujhe dar lagta hai,
Peeche hai COBOL ke thela .. Hmm,
Kyon dara rahe ho,
Aage hai 4GL ka mela,
Peeche hai COBOL ke thela,
US bhi jaana hai mushkil,
Bench pe rehna hai mushkil,
Socho kabhi aisa ho to kya ho,
Socho kabhi aisa ho to kya ho,
Hum tum Solitaire khel rahe ho,
Aur Page Fault aa jaye,
Hum tum ek Network pe logged ho,
Aur Server down ho jaye.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Intelligence
/*************************************/
Intelligence
Pervez Musharraf comes to Delhi for a meeting with
Vajpayee. After
dinner,Vajpayee says toMusharraf: "Well, I don't know
what you think of the members of your Cabinet, but mine
are all bright and brilliant."
"How do you know?" asks Musharraf.
"Oh well, it's simple", says Atal. "
They all have to take special tests before they can be
a minister.
Wait a second". He calls Advani over and says to him
"Tell me Advaniji, who is the child of your father and
of your mother who is not your brother and is not your
sister?"
"Ah, that's simple", says Advani, "it is me!"
"Well done Advani", says Vajpayee and Musharraf is ery
impressed.
He returns to Islamabad and wonders about the
intelligence of the members of his Cabinet. He calls in
his favourite member of Cabinet and
asks: "Tell me, who is the child of your father and of
your mother who is not your brother and is not your
sister?" He thinks and thinks and doesn't know the
answer. "Can I think about it a bit further? May I let
you know tomorrow?" "Of course", says Musharraf,
"you've got 24 hours."
He goes away, thinks as hard as he can, calls in his
Cabinet Secretary,
Chief Secretaries and Joint Secretaries, but no-one
knows the answer.
Twenty hours later,the member of Musharraf's Cabinet is
very worried still no answer and only 4 hours to go.
Eventually he says: "I'll ask
Benazir, she's clever, she'll know the answer."
He calls Benazir. "Benazir ", he says, "tell me who is
the child of your father and of your other who is not
your brother and is not your sister?"
"Very simple", says Benazir, "it's me!"
"Of course" says the Cabinet member and rings
Musharraf. "Sir", says he,
"I've got the answer:
It's Benazir Bhutto".
"No, you idiot", says Musharraf, "it's Advani".
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Intelligent consultant
/*************************************/
Intelligent consultant
It's all about an intelligent consultant...
Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on
the
edge of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Jeep Cherokee
screeches
to a halt next to him. The driver, a young man dressed in a suit
and
Ray-Ban glasses, gets out and asks the shepherd "If I guess how
many
sheep you have, will you give me one of them?"
The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the sheep
grazing
and says, "All right."
The young man parks the car, connects the notebook and the
mobile,
enters a NASA site, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a data
base
and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms, then prints a
150-page
report on his high-tech mini-printer. He then turns to the
shepherd
and says "You have exactly 1586 sheep here."
The shepherd answers, "That's correct, you can have your sheep.
The
young man takes the sheep and puts it in the back of his jeep."
The shepherd looks at him and asks "If I guess your profession,
will
you return my sheep to me?"
The young man answers "Yes, why not."
The shepherd says, "You are a consultant!"
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd "First, you come here without
being called. Second, you charge me a sheep to tell me something
already knew. Third, you do not understand anything about what I
do,
because you took my dog!"
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
laughter
/*************************************/
Just check this out........................
1.What will u call a person who is leaving India??
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.
Socho...............
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Hindustan Lever (Leaver).
.
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2.Kalidas ka ek bhai joote banata tha us ka naam
kya
tha...................................?
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.Socho...............
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Answer) adidas
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3. Luv and Kush are going to a village & in between
comes a well.
Luv falls into the well. Why ?
.
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.
.Socho...............
.
.come on u can guess it right..
.
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.
.chalo i shall tell u the answer..
.
.Because Luv is blind!!!!!
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4.Now Kush also jumps inside. Why?
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. Socho...............
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..arey yaar iska Jawab toh do bhai !!................
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OK lot's of head scratching done.
Answer is...
.........Luv ke liye saala kuch bhi karega!!!!
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okay.........Want one more...
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5..Jackie Chan ki saas ka naam kya hai?..
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..Socho...............
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. nahi pata..??
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answer) D'Cold
..chain ki saans = D'cold
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6.chalo ab batao
.......Jackie Chan ki bahu ka naam kya hai ?
.
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.
..this is quite simple..
.
.
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..answer) D'Cold again !!!
.
.
.kyunki saans bhi kabhi bahu thi !!!
Ab Batao.......mazaaa aayaa ki nahin?????
Khoob haso aur hassaao, kyuki.....laughter is the best
medicine!!!!!
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Life of a Dynamic Software Pro ...
/*************************************/
Life of a Dynamic Software Pro ...
Hello friends
are u software professional????????????
Then please check out your dincharya it may be like this"""""
Life of a Dynamic Software Pro ...
8:30AM: Wake up
8:45AM: Tough decision ; To bathe or not.
8:50AM: Have To.
9:15AM: Swipe in.
9:20AM: Check Mail.
9:25AM: Check Again just in case...
9:30AM: TEA
10:00AM: Check mail.
10:05AM: Check again.Can'nt Believe that no mail has come. Is every Bdy
dead
or what.
10:20AM: Sudden feeling of loneliness and dsperation.
Turn around to look for some body (Any body) to talk to.
10:30AM: Found a guy testing something. Feel real pity for his
pathetic,boring and useless existence.
10:40AM:Sudden urge to get some work done and fast. Start looking for
the
file.Can't remember it's name.
11:00AM: Boss summons in his office. Bad sign.
11:30AM: How the hell am i suppose to remember everything. Why should i
be
responsible for everything that goes bad.
11:45AM: Try to locate a scape goat. No body around.
12:00AM: Mood is really bad decide to postpone work till after lunch.
12:30AM: lunch
1:00PM: Lunch over.
1:10PM: Go for a smoke.Can't even smoke in this god forsaken place.
1:35PM: Back from a smoke. It was good. I even did not pay for the cig.
Theother chap is so foolish.
1:50PM: Mood is good.Real sleazy thoughts.
2:30PM: Feeling real sleepy after such a mammoth mental effort.
2:45PM: Tea Time.
3:00PM: Chat and discuss with collegue on the bad state of the company.
Blame everybody for incompetence and laziness.
4:00PM: A guy from testing comes for help.(Jerk)
4:11PM: Try to look busy.
4:12PM: He is asking for a technical help.(Real jerk).
4:15PM: After really making him beg for help decide to take a look.
4:50PM: No solution found. really angry on the guy for getting myself
involve.
4:55PM: Sudenly boss is spotted in the neighbouring area.
Try make as much loud noise as possible with some obscure technical
jargon
thrown in.
5:00PM: Boss has gone back to his den. Coast is clear.
5:05PM: Blame the problem on on-site people.
5:10PM: Check mail. 'Yes' a mail has finally arrived.
5:13PM: It's a silly joke and old too. But it felt good.
5:44PM: a quick dash for gate.
5:45PM: Third in punching out.
6:00PM: Reached Room.
6:01PM: TV on.No worth while program.
8:30PM: Still no worth while program.
Every body is getting lazi and irreseposible
what will happen to this world GOD help us. Curse goverment.
8:45PM: Food arrives. Pretty bad and stinking.
8:48PM: Dinner finished.
8:50PM: Bay watch. At last some quality.
11:00PM: Mtv Grind. Hmm things are looking up.
12:45AM: Today there were really good programs.
1:46AM: decide to sleep. Tough day ahead
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
madads
/*************************************/
Subject: mad ads
******************MAD ADS*****************************
1 WANT TO PROPOSE A GIRL
JUST DO IT-------NIKE.
2 BEFORE GOING TO PROPOSE TO A GIRL
BELIEVE IN THE BEST------BPL.
3 IF YOU ARE HESITATING BEFORE PROPOSING TO A
GIRL
VICKS KI GOLI LO KICH KICH DOOR
KARO-------VICKS.
4 IF YOU ARE GOING TO PROPOSE TO A GIRL
CHANCES ARE 50-50------BRITANIA.
5 IF A GIRL SLAPPED YOU WHEN YOU PROPOSED TO HER
TAKE IT EASY-------LIMCA.
6 GIRL SAYS NO!
JOR KA JHATKA DHIRE SE LAGE------MIRINDA.
7 THOSE WHO SUCCED IN LOVE ALWAYS SAY
WE DREAM BECAUSE WE DO-----DAEWOO.
8 IF SOME ONE WANTS TO WRITE A LOVE LETTER TO
HIS
GIRLFRIEND
LIKHO SCRIPT APNA APNA------ROTAMAC.
9 IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE
GO GET IT----VISA POWER.
10 BOY RIDING A BIKE WITH NEIGHBOUR'S GIRL
NEIGHBOUR'S ENVY OWNER'S PRIDE----ONIDA.
11 NOT SATISFIED WITH THE DATE
YEH DIL MANGE MORE---PEPSI.
12 A GUY HAVING A NUMBER OF GIRL FRIENDS
A COMPLETE MAN----RAYMONDS.
13 A SMART GIRL HAVING A NUMBER OF BOYFRIENDS
YEH HAI HAMARA SURAKSHA CHAKRA---COLGATE.
14 FOR THOSE LOST IN LOVE
HAR SHAAM KA SATHI MAIN AUR
MERA------BAGPIPER
WHISKY.
15 FOR A GUY OR GAL WHO HASN'T YET FOUND ONE
DHOONDTE REHE JAYO GE-------SURF EXCEL.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
MAIN AUR MERE ROOMMATES
/*************************************/
> MAIN AUR MERE ROOMMATES.......... Main Aur mere
roommates aksar Yeh Baatain Karte Hain Ghar saaf
hota to kaisa hota Main kitchen saaf karta,tum
bathrooom dhote main hall saaf karta, tum balcony
dekhte Log is baat pe hairaan hote aur us baat pe
haste.... Main aur mere roommates , aksar Yeh
Baatain Karte Hain Yeh hara bhara sink hai ya
bartanon ki jang chidi hui hai Yeh colour full
kitchen hai ya masalon se holi kheli hai Hai farsh
ki nayi design ya doodh,beer se dhuli hui hain Yeh
cellphone hai ya dhakkan, sleeping bag ya kisika
aanchal, ye airfreshner ka naya flavour hai, ya
trash bag se ati badboo Yeh pattiyon ki hai
sarsarahut ke heater phirse kharab hua hai Yeh
sonchta hain roommate kab se gum sum - Ke jab ke
usko bhi yeh khabar hai Ke cockroach nahi hai,
kaheen nahi hai magar uska dil hai ke kah raha hai cockroach yaheen hai, yaheen kaheen hai ! ( bhailog
...sound familiar!!??) Toand ( pet ) ki ye haalat,
meri bhi hai, uski bhi, dil mein ek tasvir idhar bhi
hai, udhar bhi Karne ko bohot kuch hai magar kab
kare hum Kab tak yoon hi is tarah rahe hum Dil
kahta hai Safeway se koi vaccum cleaner la de ye
Carpet jo jine ko zoonz raha hai, fikwa de Hum saaf
rahe sakte hai, logon ko bata dain, Haan hum
roommates hai - roommates hai - roommates hai Ab dil
main yehi baaaat, idhar bhi hai udhar bhi...... Sab
ko bata dain......... *********************************************************************
Kabhi Kabhi Mere Dil Main Yeh Khayaal Aataaa Hai Ke kitchen mein bartano ka dher hua hai Wo hum
roj-ke-roj shayad dho bhi sakte the Ye sabzi ka
zamela jo fridge ka muqadaar bana hai shayad kisi
din dhool /katkar , paak bhi sakti thi Magar Yeh Ho
Na Sakaa, Magar Yeh Ho Na Sakaa,Aur Ab Yeh Aalam hai
Ke recipie Nahi, masala nahi, wo bhaji Bhi Nahi Guzar Rahi Hai PIZZA khake Zindagi Jaise Isay kisi
PULAAV Ki Aarzoo Bhi Nahi Na Koi "Sapna", Na
"Smriti", Na "Roshni" Ka Surag Bhatak Rahi Hay BAY
AREA Mein Zindagi Meri Inhee 101-280, El Camoni pe
reh Jaaon Ga Kabhi Kho Kar Directions to tu hi dega
Mere Hum-Nafas Magar Yu Heen Kabhi Kabhi Mere Dil
Main Yeh Khayaal Aata *********************************************************************
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Mr.Saurav Ganguly
/*************************************/
This song is composed for our great Indian captian
Mr.Saurav Ganguly.
Have a look on it.
Nagma boli kem chhey kem chhey kem chhey
Dada bole eim chhey eim chhey eim chhey
runs nahin bante hain matches mein
arrey yeh to game chhey game chhey game chhey game
chhey
jab ball ko maine dekha aur dekh ke maara shot
sneak liya ball ne aur ho gaya main caught
last time tha score less than 10
aur is baar bhi same chhey same chhey same chhey
same chhey
(repeat)Nagma boli kem....
jab fielding ki thi baari to chhode maine catch
mere kaaran hi India ne haare itne match
khelta hoon itna ghatiya par mujhko
aati nahin shame chhey shame chhey shame chhey shame
chhey
(repeat)Nagma boli kem...
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
PROGRAMMER'S LOVE LETTER
/*************************************/
======================================================
PROGRAMMER'S LOVE LETTER
Just know that the love I have for you
Is not to be put in a stack or queue
Like a variable in an infinite loop
Be in my heart always and never stoop
My heart is like a port, unread,
and the love I have has only one thread
You are in my heart's RAM and not in the cache
So if you wont respond, my heart will crash
Like an application that is stand alone,
I'm a programmer who earns a lot on my own
And my request is clear, without any encryption
And hope it is not void, that you return
If Java can be linked with C
Or If e-mails can be sent for free
Why on earth can't you and me
For the rest of our life time together be?
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
RESUME of Pakya Bhai Supariwala
/*************************************/
RESUME of Pakya Bhai Supariwala
Name: Pakya Bhai Supariwala
Objective: To obtain a challenging position as a Crime Implementation
Analyst (CIA)
Education: MS (Criminal Sciences) Virginia Prison for International
Smugglers and the Unlawful(VPISU),August 1996.
Thesis: "On escaping from high security prisons like Alcatraz with
minimal efforts" BS (Crime Technology) Tihar Jail, India,
Coursework:Cop Psychology,
Plastic Explosives Technology,
Bomb Controls and Timer Device Theory,
International Smuggling and Drug Trafficking,
Object Oriented Crime Design
Work Experience:
Research Assistant, LTTE Labs, Jaffna,Augn 1990-Aug 1991
* Worked on the prestigious Belt Bomb project
* Developed instant death cyanide capsules in orange, strawberry and
mint flavors (Patent# 007,13,666)
Summer Internship:
Dawood Ibrahim and Haji Mastan Associates,Bombay,June1987-July1990
* Worked as a hitman and was responsible for many supari style
Killings:
* Participated in election rigging in Bihar and made hafta collections
Honors:
* Won 1980 Gabbar Singh Memorial Award (given to child prodigies in
crime)
* Member, IPKF (Indian Professional Killers Forum) student chapter
References:
* Dr. Charles Sobhraj, Full Time Prof.,Tihar Jail, New Delhi
* Dr. Chandra Swamy, Visiting Faculty Tihar Jail, New Delhi
* Dr. Dawood Ibrahim, Overseas Projects Manager, Dubai
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
SANTA SINGH IN A TRAIN.........
/*************************************/
SANTA SINGH IN A TRAIN.........
After making a trip of South India, Santa Singh, his
wife and his
son were returning to Punjab in Tamil Nadu Express.
Santa Singh was
occupying the lower berth, his wife the middle berth
and his son the
top most berth in the train.
When the train stopped at one of the stations on the
way back the
son requested Santa Singh to bring him a cup of
ice-cream to which
Santa readily agreed. When Santa and his son
returned they found that
a South Indian who couldn't understand Hindi had
occupied his son's
berth.
Outraged, Santa Singh called the TTE and asked him
to help. TTE
requested that he could not understand Hindi/
Punjabi so it would be
better if Santa Singh explained the whole situation
to him in
English.
Santa Singh explained, "That man sleeping on top of
my wife is not
giving berth(birth ??) to my child."
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Sher Arz kiya hain
/*************************************/
1. Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
2. Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
3. Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
4. Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't like your face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
5. Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
6. Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
7. Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
8. Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
9. Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
10. Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
slaryTheorm
/*************************************/
DILBERT'S THEOREM ON SALARY:
Dilbert's Theorem on Salary states that engineers and
scientists
never earn as much salary as business executives and sales
people.
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical
equation
based on the following three postulates:
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power (Knowledge=Power)
Postulate 2: Time is Money (Time=Money)
Postulate 3 (as every engineer knows): Power
=Work/Time
It therefore follows:
Knowledge = Work / Time
and since
Time = Money,
we have:
Knowledge =Work / Money.
Solving for Money,
we get:
Money = Work/Knowledge
Thus,
as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches
infinity,
regardless of the amount of Work done.
Conclusion 1: The Less you Know, the More you Make.
Conclusion 2: This is the reason why your BOSS is paid
more
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
soft songs
/*************************************/
soft songs,fun
Local Variable
Mein pal do pal ka shayar hoon,
pal do pal meri kahani hai
pal do pal meri hastihai..
Global variable
Main har ik pal ka shayar hoon
har ik pal meri kahani hai
har ik pal meri hasti hai ...
Null Pointers
Mera jeevan kora kagaz kora hi reh gaya.
Dangling pointers
Maut bhi aati nahi jaan bhi jati nahin.
goto
Ajeeb dastan hai yeh Kahan shuru kahan khatam
Ye manzilen hain kaun si Na woh samajh sake na hum
Two Recursive functions calling each other
Mujhe kuchh kehna hein
mujhe bhi kuchh kehna hein
pehle tum, pehle tum
The debugger
Jab koi baat bigar jaye
Jab koi mushkil par jaye
Tum dena saath mera O hamnawa
COM programming in VC++
Roop tera mastana
Pyar mera deewana
Bhool kahin hum se na ho jaye
From VC++ to VB
Yeh haseen vaadiyan
Yeh khula asmaan
Aa gaye hum kahan
Untrackable bug
Aye ajnabi, tum bhi kabhi, awaaz de kahin se
Unexpected bug (esp during presentation to client)
Ye kya hua, Yeh kion hoa, Yeh kab hoa, najaano main najaanay woh
Modem - modem talk on a busy connection
suno - kaho,
kaha - suna,
kuch huwa kya?
abhee to nahin..
Windows getting open sourced
Parde mein rahne do
parda na uthao
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
some hard facts
/*************************************/
some hard facts :)
The man discovered COLOURS and invented PAINT,
The woman discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP.
The man discovered the WORD and invented CONVERSATION,
The woman discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP.
The man discovered GAMBLING and invented CARDS,
The woman discovered CARDS and invented WITCHERY.
The man discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD,
The woman discovered FOOD and invented DIET.
The man discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE,
The woman discovered LOVE and invented MARRIAGE.
The man discovered TRADING and invented MONEY,
The woman discovered MONEY and invented SHOPPING.
Thereafter man has discovered and invented a lot of things...
While the woman STUCK to shopping.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
SWEET REVENGE
/*************************************/
Subject: SWEET REVENGE!!!
YES! YES YES~!...finally.....finally!!...(sigh)
:
TO WOMEN EVERYWHERE FROM A MAN WHO'S HAD ENOUGH
=================================================
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to
answer.
Quit complaining and learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it
down.
If you won't dress like the Baywatch girls, don't expect us to act
like
soap
opera guys.
Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than
short
hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married
women
always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.
Birthdays, Valentines, and anniversaries are not quests to see if we
can
find the perfect present yet again!
If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer
you
don't want to hear.
Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss
such topics as navel lint, the 4-4-2 formation, or monster trucks.
Saturday & Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of
the
tides. Let it be.
Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never going to think of it that
way.
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
Really.
You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes. Most guys own three
pairs
of shoes - what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which
pair,
out
of thirty, would look good with your dress?
Crying is blackmail. Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this
one:
Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints
don't
work. Just say it!
No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on
the
calendar.
Peeing standing up is more difficult. We're bound to miss sometimes.
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come
to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we
do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
Check your own damn oil.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All
comments
become null and void after 3 days. If something we said can be
interpreted
two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
other
one.
Let us ogle. We're going to look anyway; it's genetic.
You can either tell us to do something OR tell us how to do something
but
not both.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercial
breaks.
ALL men see in only 16 colours. Peach is a fruit, not a colour.
If it itches, it will be scratched.
Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like
nothing's
wrong. We know you're lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
sw eng. and wife
/*************************************/
Conversation between a Software Engg. & his wife :
HUSBAND- HAI DEAR, I AM LOGGED IN.
WIFE- HAVE YOU BROUGHT THE SAREE
HUSBAND- BAD COMMAND OR FILE NAME
WIFE - BUT I TOLD YOU ABOUT IT IN MORNING
HUSBAND- ERRONEOUS SYNTAX, ABORT, RETRY, CANCEL
WIFE- HAE BHAGWAN! FORGET IT WHERE'S YOUR SALARY
HUSBAND- FILE IN USE, READ ONLY, TRY AFTER SOME TIME.
WIFE- ATLEAST GIVE ME YOUR CREDIT CARD, I CAN DO SOME SHOPPING
HUSBAND- SHARING VIOLATION, ACCESS DENIED.
WIFE- I MADE A MISTAKE IN MARRING YOU
HUSBAND - DATA TYPE MISMATCH
WIFE- YOU ARE USELESS
HUSBAND- BY DEFAULT
WIFE- WHO WAS THERE WITH YOU IN THE CAR THIS MORNING
HUSBAND- SYSTEM UNSTABLE, PRES <CTRL, <ALT, <DEL TO REBOOT.
WIFE- WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE SOME SNACKS
HUSBAND- HARD DISK FULL
WIFE- WHAT IS THE RELATION BETWEEN YOU & YOUR RECEPTIONIST
HUSBAND- THE ONLY USER WITH WRITE PERMISSION
WIFE- WHAT IS MY VALUE IN YOUR LIFE
HUSBAND- UNKNOWN VIRUS DETECTED
WIFE- DO YOU LOVE ME OR YOUR COMPUTER
HUSBAND- TOO MANY PARAMETERS
WIFE- I WILL GO TO MY DADS HOUSE
HUSBAND PROGRAMM PERFORMED ILLEGAL OPERATION, IT WILL CLOSE
WIFE IT IS WORTHLESS TALKING TO YOU
HUSBAND SHUT DOWN THE COMPUTER
WIFE I AM GOING
HUSBAND ITS NOW SAFE TO TURN OFF YOUR COMPUTER
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
sw eng
/*************************************/
All about software engineers.
Ramu : Hey.. my submarine is not sinking into the
water!! what could be
wrong?
Somu : may be u have used float instead of double in
the software.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
PS : Hey Bull, Can you do me a favor? Can you pass
on
this 500 ruppees to Suthi..?
Bull : Sure.. why not? But tell me one thing. Tell
me
whether its pass by value or pass by reference..
PS : ???!!!
------------------------------------------------------------------
Ramu: i am very very sure that the guy who just
talked to me is a software
engineer...
Somu: how do u say that?
ramu: he asked my physical address instead of my
home
address!
----------------------------------------------------------------
ramu: hey... I heard that u going to sue Bjarne
Stroustrup.. what happened...?
Somu: I was reading his book aloud...and it said:
"All friends have access to private parts.."
Next day my wife divorced me....
----------------------------------------------------------------
Ramu: shhhh...I think the SW Engg who is sitting in
the
next cabin must be a farmer before ...
somu: How do u know...?
Ramu: he asked me today that is there a way to
cultivate the bit fields..!!
----------------------------------------------------------------
ramu: why people are beating that SW engg black and
blue?
somu: it seems, he asked one of them that whether
"vante mataram" is new kind of RAM in the market!
----------------------------------------------------------------
ramu: Hey.. I think that SW Engg is very very
naive..
somu: How do u say that?
ramu: He believes that there is an Arabian Sea++
next to Arabin Sea.
----------------------------------------------------------------
ramu: Hey.... whats time now?
somu: System time or local time...??
-------------------------------------------------------------------
ramu: Hey.. I have a problem. My system is not
booting up!
somu: may be, its internal buses are on
strike..check out!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
ramu : (while browsing the TV) what is this? I have
heard of Star Sports, Star Movies and Star Plus.
Whats this Star Equals??? Is it a new Star channel?
somu : No. = operator has been overloaded in Star
Channel.
---------------------------------------------------------
geetha : I think that SW Engg is very naive..
seetha : how do u say that?
geetha : He believes "Rascal" is a new version of
Pascal!
----------------------------------------------------------
ramesh : Hey.. u know.. Micorsoft Visual C++ 5.0 has
got everything... The
Developer Studio can really
do magic...
umesh : Can we use that to develope the
photo-negatives?
--------------------------------------------------------
ramu : why are u wipping ur terminal very often with
a cloth?
somu : clear command is not working properly for my
terminal. thats why?
-------------------------------------------------------
babu : yesterday I bought a new TV whose terminal is
compatible with computer... but its audio
portion is not at all working
gopu : may be its compatible only with dumb
terminals???
------------------------------------------------------
Vani : We have shifted our home to Malleswaram now..
soni : right shift or left shift??
------------------------------------------------------
kannamma : do u have Design Specs for brinjal
sambar?
ponnamma : u mean recipe..?
--------------------------------------------------------
vanish: Hey.. why is that sardaarji inserting a
cover
into the floppy drive?
bull : He wants to send an e-mail it seems!
--------------------------------------------------------------
Software DT in Heaven:
ramu : hey.. I coudlnt send a mail to Hell today...
it says mail "demon" not
running...
somu : ur case is better.. for me, it says "ghost
not
reachable" and bounces back!
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
taj
/*************************************/
*
|
/^\
/ \
| | ( ) | |
/^\ | /^\ \ / /^\ | /^\
|O| /^\ ( )|-----|( ) /^\ |O|
|_| |-| |^-^|---||-----||---|^-^| |-| |_|
|O| |O| |/^\|/^\|| | ||/^\|/^\| |O| |O|
|-| |-| ||_|||_||| /^\ |||_|||_|| |-| |-|
|O| |O| |/^\|/^\||( )||/^\|/^\| |O| |O|
|-| |-| ||_|||_|||| ||||_|||_|| |-| |-|
|O| |_| |___|___|||___|||___|___| |O| |O|
|_|_____________________________________|_|
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As a Bachelor
Takdir hai, magar kismat nahi khulti
tajmahal banana chahata hoon
lekin mumtaz nahi milti
As a Lover
Takdir hai, magar kismat nahi khulti
tajmahal banana chahata hoon,
mumtaz mil gayi hai magar
woh shaadi nahi karti
As a married one
Takdir hai, magar kismat nahi khulti
tajmahal banana chahata hoon
lekin mumtaz nahi marti
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Tari Yaad Aave Chhe
/*************************************/
Tari Yaad Aave Chhe
-----------------------------------
scroll karu mari juni yado ne
hyperlink thai ne tu same ave chhe.
ek ek minute tari yad ave chhe
screen saver ni jem tu same ave chhe
Besu chhu kam karva
minimize karu chhu mari badhha window ne
Desktop ni jem tu same ave chhe
delete karu chhu a yado ni file ne
pan thodi thodi vare a recyclebin mathi pachhi ave
chhe.
shutdown karu chhu mari system
to pan shutdown message ma tu ave chhe.
scan karu chhu mari harddisk ne
virus bani ne tu same ave chhe
dial karu chhu isp ne
connection lai ne tu ave chhe
disconnect thai maru connection
reconnect thai tari yad pachhi ave chhe
open karu chhu mara network neighborhood ne
entire network ma khali tuj ave chhe
start karu chhu mara computer ne
to taskbar ma system date ane time bani ave chhe
off karva jau chhu system date ne
to pan taskbar property ma tuj ave chhe.
ghare thi aavu chhu office to
My briefcase ma tu sathe ave chhe.
kholu chhu a yado ni site ne
to home page ni jem tu same ave chhe
banavi rahyo chhu webastrologer.com
darek kundali ma tu nazar ave chhe
ave chhe error mara programme ma
MSDN Help bani tu ave chhe
compile karu chhu javana programme ne
classpath check kari tu ave chhe
joi a chhe mari system ne power
power code bani tu ave chhe
betho chhu site banavva
domain name bani tu same ave
store karava mangu chhu kaik
Database bani tu ave chhe
select karva mangu chhu
mouse pointer bani tu ave chhe
vicharu chho bijukai jova
najar udi ne tari taraf ave chhe
gherayelo chhu computer processing ma
taskmanager ni rite tu same ave chhe
connection maltu nathi
to pan offline tari yad ave chhe
chalu karu chhu mara monitor ne
256 color ma tu same ave chhe
vichar karu chhu ghani var
su tane pan mari yad ave chhe?.
aavto nathi taro javab to vicharu chhu ke
su kam mane tari aatli badhi yad ave chhe.
check karu chhu mara inbox ne
tara sivay badha na email ave chhe.
jo ave taro email to
to hash manu ke koi ne to mari yad ave chhe.
suki padi gai chhe a yado
Tame malo to taji kari shakay chhe
samji shaku chhu a fast life ne
yaad taji karva mate to ek email pan bahu ganay chhe.
jo ave taro reply to
to samju tane mari yad ave chhe
nahi to bijani jem tu pan bhuli jay chhe....
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
The Programmer's Filmography..
/*************************************/
The Programmer's Filmography..
1. Do Loop..
Sau sall pahle , muje tumse pyar tha, aaj bhi hai, aur kal bhi rahega..
2. If Then Else..
Tum agar mujko na chaho to koi baat nahin magar kisi aur ko chahogi to
mushkil hogi.
3.Return Statement..
Aa laut ke aaja mere meet tuje mere geet bulaate hai.
4. Procedure Call..
Aaja re aab mera Dil Pukara, Ro Ro ke dil bhi hara.
5. Exit(), Suspend
Rukja O dil Diwane, Dekhu to me jara.
Rukja O jane wali rukja..
6.For(; ;) , The Infinite Loop
Hum Tum, yug yug se ye geet milan ke gaate rahe hain, gaate rahenge hum
tum.
7. Static/Local Variable..
Jeena yaha marna yaha iske siva jana kaha
8. Two Recursive Functions Calling Ecah other..
Muje kuchh kahena hai, muje bhi kuchh kahena hai,
pahele tum, pahele tum..
9.Reomte Login.
Tumse kuchh kahena hai agar tum kuchh kahene do.
10. Network Busy..
Suno - kaho, kaha suna, kuch hua kya? abhee to nahi.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Things You Would Never Know Without Indian-Hindi Movies
/*************************************/
Things You Would Never Know Without Indian/Hindi Movies
1. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but
will wince when a woman tries to cleanse his wounds.
2. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through
it
before long.
3. The hero cannot fall in love with the heroine vice versa) unless
they
first perform a dance number in the rain.
4. Once applied, make-up is permanent, in rain or in any other
situation.
5. Village girls who live among cows and sheep have perfect skin and
teeth.
6. A large group of gundoos can be shooting at the hero, but he will
never
be hit, unless of course he is attempting to save the heroine.
7. A large group of gundoos can be shooting at the hero with machine
guns,
yet they will always miss. Every shot the hero takes from his
small
revolver will knock down at least ten opponents in a line.
8. If you decide to start dancing in a field, everyone you bump into
will
know all the steps, and will be wearing coordinated outfits.
9. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight
involving
martial arts-your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one
by
dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out
their
predecessors.
10. A heroine will have time to change outfits several times in one
song,
however short.
11. In the final scene, the hero will discover that the bad guy who he
is
up against is actually his brother and the maid who looked after him
is
his mother and the chief inspector is his father and the Judge is his
uncle and so forth.
12. Key English words used in the movie (usually said out loud between
sentences) are: No problem!, My God!, Get Out! Shut-up!,
Impossible!,Please forgive me! You Bloody Bastard!
13. 2 people can be dancing in the desert and out of nowhere, 100
people
will appear from god-knows-where and joins them in the dance.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
why did the chicken cross the road...
/*************************************/
KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.
PLATO: For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.
TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN: I forget.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the
competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting ,in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation
processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology
in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with
deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each
other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The
meeting was held in a park-like setting enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and
aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more
successful.
LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken `crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, ``Thou shalt cross the road.'' And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?
FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: Our soon-to-be-released Chicken '98 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
OLIVER STONE: The question is not, ``Why did the chicken cross the road?'' Rather, it is, ``Who was crossing the road at the sametime, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken
crossing?''
DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.
EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road... it transcended it.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.
MICHAEL SCHUMACHER: It was an instinctive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn't see the road until he had already started to cross.
COLONEL SANDERS (Famed for Kentucky Fried Chicken): I missed one?
PHYSICIST: Because the chicken's momentum had a positive component towards the other side of the road.
QUANTUM PHYSICIST: Because you measured its momentum too precisely.
MATHEMATICIAN: Because of the intermediate values theorem.
ALGEBRAIC GEOMETRIST: Well, consider a faithfully flat etale coherent sheaf...
C PROGRAMMER: cross_road() was called from get_other_side()
C++ PROGRAMMER: chicken-CrossRoad() was called from chicken-GetOtherSide()
RMS: The licenses for most roads are designed to take away your chicken's freedom to cross it. By contrast, the GALLUS Road Public Licence...
GARY LARSON: ``THE OTHER SIDE - Why do you need a reason?''
ENS STUDENT: Contretest.
OMAR KHAYYÁM:
I sent my Chicken across the Road,
Some Letter of that Other-side to download:
And by and by my Chicken return'd to me,
And answer'd ``I Myself am Princess and Toad:''
MARKETING DIVISION OF MICROSOFT CORPORATION: Where does your chicken want to go today?
MARVIN: The other side is just as dull as this one. Don't talk to me about chickens.
ARTHUR DENT: Why did the chicken cross the road? 42? No, that doesn't make sense.
GOETHE: Es irrt das Huhn, solang es die Straße übergeht.
HARI SELDON: It's part of the Plan.
HAMLET:
To cross, or not to cross, that is the question: -
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind, to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous side;
Or to take arms against a road of troubles,
And by crossing end them?
THERMODYNAMIST: Because the pressure of chickens was greater on this side of the road, and the chicken's crossing made the entropy greater.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
Wife-Husband
/*************************************/
A man wants to have a WIFE because she can make his life:
W : WONDERFUL
I : INTERESTING
F : FASCINATING
E : EXTRAORDINARY
But a woman will have to be careful in finding a
HUSBAND because he might be:
H : HOPELESS
U : UNACCOUNTABLE
S : SENSELESS
B : BORING
A : AUTHORITATIVE
N : NUISANCE
D : DISCRIMINATIVE
Why does a man want to have a WIFE? Because she can provide:
W : Washing
I : Ironing
F : Food
E : Entertainment
FREE of CHARGE!!!!!!!!!
Why does a woman want have a HUSBAND? Because he is expected to
H : House her
U : Understand her
S : Share everything with her
B : Buy anything for her
A : and
N : Never
D : Demand anything from her!!!!!
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
women
/*************************************/
TO WOMEN EVERYWHERE FROM A MAN WHO'S HAD ENOUGH
=================================================
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to
answer.
Quit complaining and learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it
down.
If you won't dress like the Baywatch girls, don't expect us to act
like
soap
opera guys.
Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than
short
hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married
women
always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.
Birthdays, Valentines, and anniversaries are not quests to see if we
can
find the perfect present yet again!
If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer
you
don't want to hear.
Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss
such topics as navel lint, the 4-4-2 formation, or monster trucks.
Saturday & Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of
the
tides. Let it be.
Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never going to think of it that
way.
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
Really.
You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes. Most guys own three
pairs
of shoes - what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which
pair,
out
of thirty, would look good with your dress?
Crying is blackmail. Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this
one:
Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints
don't
work. Just say it!
No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on
the
calendar.
Peeing standing up is more difficult. We're bound to miss sometimes.
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come
to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we
do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
Check your own damn oil.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All
comments
become null and void after 3 days. If something we said can be
interpreted
two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
other
one.
Let us ogle. We're going to look anyway; it's genetic.
You can either tell us to do something OR tell us how to do something
but
not both.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercial
breaks.
ALL men see in only 16 colours. Peach is a fruit, not a colour.
If it itches, it will be scratched.
Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like
nothing's
wrong. We know you're lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
/**************************************
Smiling is the best.
That.
You can enjoy it.
You can experience it.
You can achieve it.
How?
Keep on reading KEEP SMILING
You are at homepage of Manish Panchmatia
http://www.geocities.com/panchmatia_manish
**************************************/
ye degree bhi lelo ye naukari bhi lelo
/*************************************/
ye degree bhi lelo ye naukari bhi lelo
Bhale Chheen lo mujhse US ka visa
magar mujhko lautado college ka canteen
vo kam chaay ka pani vo tikha samosaa
kadi dhup mein Apne ghar se nikalnaa
vo project ki Khaatir shaher bhar Bhataknaa
vo lecture ko dostonki proxy lagaanaa
vo sar ko chidhanaa vo aeroplane udanaa
vo submission ki ratonko jagnaa jagaanaa
vo orals ki khahani vo practical ka kissaa....
bimaari ka detention ke time bahanaa
vo dusaron ke assignments ko apnaa banaanaa
vo seminar ke din pairo ka chhatpatanaa
vo workshop mein din raat pasinaa bahanaa
vo exam ke din ka bechain maahaul
par vo maa ka vishvas Teacher ka Bharosaa
> > >
vo gathering ke din ka ladnaa Jhagadnaa
vo ladkiyonka yuhi hamesha Akadnaa
Bhulaaye nahi Bhul sakta hain koi
vo college, jivan ka ek Atut hissaa...