| �I...I can�t...Roger...I...� His voice cracked and the sob escaped, and with it, his resolve. He finally let himself go, turning around in Roger�s arms and falling against him, feebly hitting his chest and sobbing. Roger held him so tightly...so very tightly. It was as if he was afraid they would slip apart again, his fists closed around handfuls of Mark's shirt, pulling him closer and closer. �I hated you,� Mark wailed to him. �I hated you so much for...for leaving me...but I love you and I need you and I want you and you can�t ever leave me again! I was going to kill myself, I wanted to! I...I d-didn�t want to be hurt anymore!� Anything else he tried to say was lost to the onslaught of sobs and the strength of the embrace Roger held him in. �Don�t ever, ever, ever think that, you�ll hurt us you�ll hurt me please please please...� he whispered into Mark�s hair. He ran his hands over it, over him, and held the sobbing mess closer than he thought possible. �I need you so much...you can�t go away like that...please don�t think about that, please...it�s not the answer! Hate me and hit me and refuse to be with me but don�t think that, ever...� His legs wavered. They couldn�t support the two of them, not after that revelation. No more Mark...god...His knees were so weak...they started to give way, and he barely cushioned the fall as they collapsed to the ground. Mark didn�t notice the fall. He was so wrapped up in the man surrounding him that he couldn�t do anything but sob and wail and gasp for air. His fingers dug into Roger�s chest, as to assure himself that his lover was still there, still with him. Roger held him tightly, whispering to him and stroking his hair and back and begging him to never, ever think thoughts like that again. They were together again. They were together and complete for the first time in ten years. ~*Haven't we been here before*~ |