Fest Virgin Report 101

by Emmet J.
5th August 2002

I have modified the message from the original post a bit and cut some parts out. Some fest virgins would be going around to fests looking for anybody called Fez to Libate them. Wait Mmmmmm this does have possibilities.

Some of the inside jokes and stuff people would not get because they were not there. Overall he made some good points about Aloe Vera and water etc. I asked to add this message here in this format.

Any smaller writing with PO beside it is notes I made.

Pagan Owl

These are not jabs, elaborate digs or insults to anyone individual or group. This is my personal report on fest and is meant to be taken in context of humour and or general consideration.

When I first got in Pagan Owls van to go to fest i was filled with both fear and trepidation. First because I wasn’t sure if he would show and second because my camping gear made his suspension sink by 8 inches.

I learned many things at Fest. I had a great time and would first like to give great praise and thanks to the organizers (you all saved me at least twice in the past 3 days) and security (especially LadyIvy Bastion of desire and Goddess of thunder and security who’s cool hats and pvc *meow* pant kept many a sleeping pagans mind occupied with much dreams of bliss and happiness.

I would also wish to give high praise to those who ran the work shops but most important of all I would like to thank everyone who attended for making fest virgins like myself and others so extremely welcome and well heartedly at home. I can honestly all of us felt your love and in ways we will never forget and will carry with us always. I also learned a few valuable lessons, which I will dispense to you now in hopes that others might learn from my mistakes and those of others. Feel free to add your own.

  1. The next time and only time I will bring an ax to fest will only be to practice throwing or with ceremonial berserker garb and fur leggings for the fashion show *ya smooth Asian boy wearing fur boots.. yeesh*

  2. Next year I will truly remember to bring enough cigarettes not only for me but also for 200 of my closest friends.

  3. I will seek other fest virgins who think grounding is a punishment reserved for adolescent children and that shielding is something that protects space ships in star trek and I will teach them the basics of these two thing or at least give them hand outs explaining basic self protections and energy work.

  4. I will again Libate the Fez and Demand the drummers take their pants off.

  5. I will bring comfortable sandals.

  6. I will make a proper offering to Oxeth see post: 1087

  7. I will not taunt the discordians nor will I forget to bring toilet paper.

  8. I will always ask permission before: Leering, Paying (showering, flooding or inundating) people with compliments, scanning, reading, channeling, worshiping, feeding trees, palm reading, seducing, dancing, seeking libation, going sky clad in ritual, Bogarting:(cigrettes, mead, food, spiritual advice, guidance, directions) intruding on or seeking out others.

  9. I will learn to enjoy sand beneath my toes, Butt and other body parts.

  10. I will learn to enjoy cold showers at all hours of the day.
    (I actually managed to have a hot shower every night after dancing by the fire. No one there then and the water had a chance to get hot. PO)

  11. I will offer assistance, blessings and praise to our gracious hosts whenever possible (and a bit of strawberry and rhubarb mead doesn’t hurt either. I still owe Eileen a bottle)
    (Remember you are a guest in someones backyard. Take nothing but memories and leave nothing behind than footprints. PO)

  12. I will always bribe the judges and fire pit tenders with libation and treats as Judges are good and Fire makes sky clad dancers happy. (You Don’t have to be in the Bardic to Bribe the judges.)
    (And you don't have to be Sky Clad to dance. PO)

  13. I will seek to create a fire retardant loin cream for sky clad fire pit dancers or at least pump funds into an R&D fund to create such a product.. (Sparks and hot flying Embers Hurt!)

  14. I will always libate the fire keepers and never fault or set charges against them as they will always get off on pyrotechinalities.
    (none aproved Pyros in the fire gets people injured. PO)

  15. I will bring hand cream for the drummers and food care for the fire pit dancers.
    (Each person is responsible for their own health. Its nice to watch out for each other tho. PO)

  16. I will not over pack.. wait.. Theres no such thing!
    (Yes There is!!!!!!!!!! PO)

  17. I will not bring glass to the fire pit and I will take my garbage home.
    (Broken glass does havoc on dancers bear feet. PO)

  18. I will bring extra garbage bags and clean empty water bottles for those who forgot this year.
    (I freeze up a whole bunch of plastic water bottles. They become the Ice for my cooler and as they melt they become my drinking water. Besides my food does not become Soggy. PO)

  19. I will still laugh at those who bring microwave popcorn to fest.

  20. I will bring 4x more Bug repellant, sun screen, and aloe vera, then I forgot to bring this year.

  21. I will libate and give great monetary compensation to the Cook Master and his minions for all their hard work and service.
    (Not necessary but a simple Thank You and smile is appreciated. PO)

go to Schedule for 2001
go to Schedule for 2002
go to Schedule for 2003
go to Schedule for 2004
go to Schedule for 2005

Pic sent to me by Risa Mayen
for Protection
Before you copy the pic see
her page and ask her if you can

Sent by Akasha

© Pagan Owl & Friends 2000-2002

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