"If I had any humility I would be perfect"

"Humility is like underwear, esential, but indecent if it shows"

"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people"

"He who loses money, loses much; He, who loses a friend, loses much more; He, who loses faith, loses all"

"Obstacles cannot crush me; every obstacle yields to stern resolve." - Leonardo da Vinci

"Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air." - John Quincy Adams

"Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, But beautiful old people are works of art"

"If you have nobody to turn to keep turning until you do because if you stop turning the world will spin you out of control"

"It wasn't until late in life that I discovered how easy it is to say 'I don't know'"

"Today is tomorrows yesterday."

"A day of hard work brings easy sleep. A life time of hard work brings easy death."

"It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help"

"People gather bundles of sticks to build bridges they never cross"

"Love makes the world go round, but sex makes the ride more fun"

"Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other"

"God is never late"

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." - Leonardo da Vinci

"To be simple is to be great."

"Everything should be made as simple as possible...but not simpler." - Albert Einstein

"I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches."

"Life is 10% of what happens to you, and 90% of how you respond to it"

"Did it ever occur to you that nothing occurs to God"

"Life is like a bed of roses.. but watch out for the pricks"

"Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep"

"If someone is spreading rumors about you, live so that no one will ever believe them"

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself"

"There are two things I've learned: There is a God. And, I'm not Him"

"Following the path of least resistance is what makes rivers and men crooked"

"Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace"

"Life is but a series of experiences, so to experience is to live." From: Clayos thanx!

"It is much better to want the mate you do not have than to have the mate you do not want"

"To the world you might be one person but to one person you might be the world"

"Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger"

"Real friends are those who when you feel you've made a fool of yourself don't feel you've done a permanent job"

"A coincidence is when God performs a miracle and decides to remian anonymous"

"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side"

"I do not have to attend every argument I am invited to"

"Lead your life so you won't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip"

Chinese proverbs...

"Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone"

"Man who fight wife all day get no piece at night"

"It takes many nails to build a crib but one screw to fill it"

"Man who stands on toilet is high on pot"

"Man who lives in glass house should change in basement"

"Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs"

"Man who farts in church sits in own pew"

"Crowded elevator smells different to midget"

"Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly"

"Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day"

"Man with one chopstick go hungry"

"Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails"

"Man who eat many prunes get good run for money"

"Baseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walk"

"War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left"

"The opposite of war is not peace, it's creation"