| Elmer Pig Stories #12 |
| The Case of the Golden Pig June 5, 1982 Today I got my first case since "The Case of the Zots." I was informed that a golden winged pig has been seen in the city. I took the case to find out what it is and what it is doing in our fair city. June 6, 1982 I went looking for the Golden Pig, looking up in the sky. If I could solve the case, I would get 10 pounds of gold. I looked up and, to my surprise, a Golden Pig flew by! I ran as fast as I could to the building he landed on top of. I took the stairway (because it was an old building and nobody had been near it in years), ending up on the roof. The Golden Pig looked at me and then looked back toward the sky. "Sir," I said as I walked toward him, "will you please tell me what you are doing here in our fair city and what you are?" The Golden Pig's eyes glowed with hatred as he turned back to face me. "There used to be thousands of us Golden Pigs, but you fleshy brothers pushed all the trees over to form this ugly city. There were only two of us left, my mate and myself. We parted to look for food months ago and I haven't seen her since. I'll probably never see her again because she's most likely dead or has forgotten me. He stopped as though he was more enraged that I had gotten the truth out of him. Suddenly I looked up, expecting to see nothing but air, and saw another Golden Pig. I looked at him and tried to tell him, but my voice would not work. He looked at me as though he thought I was dying. As my gasping noises stopped, LPFB came through the roof access and put a gun to my head. "If you don't want to have a guilt complex for letting this piggy get shot, you'd better give yourself up to us," the Panther said. The Golden Pig looked at me, seeming to consider his options. "Wait!" I shouted, "Don't give yourself up! I just saw the other Golden Pig!" Suddenly the expression on the Golden Pig's face changed and I realized that I had goofed: he was about to fly away, but realized I was a good "fleshy" when I told him to leave for his mate. He walked over to LPFB, allowing them to tie him up tightly. "Boy, Goldie, you sure are stupid! We're still gonna kill Elmer because he's a pain in our butts! But now we have you too!" The Lion said, laughing as they tied me up. They looked at the Golden Pig and the Bear picked me up over his head. "Now you can watch this guy try to fly to the sidewalk 20 stories below!" Bear chuckled as he spoke, but the Golden Pig's hate seemed to surface again. "I'm sorry you got involved and I hope somehow you land softly." The Golden Pig spoke, still seeming enraged by LPFB's actions. I looked at him sadly and said, "If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be in this mess...You'd be with your mate right now. It's me who's sorry." Then LPFB changed their minds about killing me instantly. "Let's wait until morning so that they can worry all night long," the Fox said happily. So I went to sleep, dreaming of my upcoming plunge...it was a fitful night's sleep. June 7, 1982 Lion woke us up. "Time for the big show!" Lion shouted, picking me up and taking me to the edge of the roof. Just as he threw me, I saw and heard the Pulk burst through the roof access door. LPFB took off, not wanting a conflict with the Pulk. The Pulk sat down almost as if drunk and stared into space, obviously stunned that he was too late to save me. When he finally shook off the momentary shock, he untied the Golden Pig. They both walked over to the roof's edge, looking down to see me splattered on the sidewalk. But instead they saw me sitting in the arms of the other Golden Pig! She had seen me fall and instantly flew up and caught me! June 8, 1982 Today I got the state to leave the rest of the woods in New Yuk to the Golden Pigs and their soon-to-be babies. So I solved another Elmer Pig mystery and made two new friends to boot! |