you make it hard to breathe
it's as if I'm suffocating
and when you're next to me
I can feel your heartbeat through my skin
it makes me sad to think
this could all be for nothing
I wish there was a way
a way for you to see inside me
I've never felt this way
about anyone or anything
Tell me!

CHORUS:
what do I have to do
to make you happy?
what do i have to do
to make you understand?
what do i have to do
to make you want me?
and if I can't make you want me
what do i have to do?

I know exactly what you're thinking
but I swear this time I will not let you down
I'm not as selfish as I used to be
that was a part of me that never made me proud
right now I think I would try anything
anything at all to keep you satisfied
God I hope you see what losing you would do to me
all I want is one more chance, tell me

(Chorus)

what do I have to do
to forget about you?

There are times
when I'm just a shell
when i don't feel anything for anyone
all i feel is hollow & bruised
used up & misused
forced to be someone i don't want to be
i have failed somehow or some way
will the weight of today
finally pull me down to drown
in the depths of despair
where i am alone
except for my rage?
my rage...my pain...
i hate my darkest days

the more i feel
the more i die
nothing to give
nothing inside
everyting i touch i break
i scratch and tear
until it bleeds
i do not want
i only need
i only need
i only need...everything i touch i break

back when you where in my life
you gave me something that i could live for
now everything's changed and you're
gone but i'm still here waiting
so how can i hold on
with nothing to hold onto...
why should i hold on
when there's nothing to hold onto...
sex made me feel alive but now i'm
so bored with mindless passion
drugs were someplace to hide but
they've left me feeling cold and empty
so how can i hold on
with nothing to hold onto...
why should i hold on
when there's nothing to hold onto...
i thought that you were my friend that you
were someone i could turn to
but now i realize you were a
friend when you needed something
so how can i hold on
with nothing to hold onto...
why should i hold on
when there's nothing to hold onto...

you seduce me lonely in your hell
naked and hungry i crawl into your cell
a virtual drugstore is piled on your bed
i can't resist with your tongue inside my head
how can everything be justified by you?
you get off on watching me bleed...
you get off on feeding my disease
this time will be perfect you explain
but your tongues as deadly as a needle in my vain

i am lost in the darkness
between two worlds and here
i'm struggling...
you're the light i've been seeking
cause my whole life there's been something missing
only you
can make me whole
just one touch and you complete me
rescue me from this black hole
that's sucked me in and left me dying
you're the truth that i've been seeking
cause my whole life i've been lying
only you
can make me whole
just one touch and you complete me
god i pray you find me worthy
of the right to stand beside you
and of your truth and of your passion
and of the right to sleep beside you
only you
can make me whole
just one touch and you complete me

i know your life is empty
and you hate to face the world alone
so you're searching for an angel
someone who can make you whole...
i cannot save you i can't even save myself
i know that you've been damned
your soul has suffered much abuse
but i am not your savior
i am just as fucked as you...
i cannot save you i can't even save myself
please don't take pity on me
my life has been a nightmare
my soul is fractured to the bone
so if i must be lonely
i think i'd rather be alone...
you cannot save me you can't even save yourself
i cannot save you i can't even save myself

everywhere i go i see your face
every sound i hear is the sound of your voice
why are you haunting me
why can't i let you go?
so everything about me is a lie
or at least it seems that way
when i look into your eyes
the truth scares the shit out of me
whoever said love is blood and love is real
has never felt the way i feel
what does it matter
what's done is done and i should
get on with my life
why are you haunting me?
well i don't know what it is
but i can't seem to make myself forget
was it something that you said
or is it all the guilt inside my head
why are you haunting me?

I know I should have told you
I was so afraid you'd leave
And now there's nothing left to say
Well nothing that you'd believe
I never meant to hurt you
With the things I couldn't say
I'd promised you tomorrow
While denying you today
These lies have torn my world apart
A darkness grows inside me
In fading shades of gray
All the colors of the world
Are slowly sucked away
I'm sinking ever deeper
To a place that's cold and black
I can't believe I've lost you
And you're never coming back
These lies have torn my world apart
Soon the night will take me
And save me from my pain
Cloak me in cold darkness
And help me lose your name
These lies have torn my world apart

Six o'clock in the morning
my head is ready to explode
I can't believe i made it home alive
I don't remember where i went
or what i was drinking
but i know it's made me sick
and i'm not denying
that i get this way
when i try to get over you
i get this way
when i try to get over you
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
i tried so hard to hate you
but it only makes things worse
i only end up hating myself
and as my hatred grows
so do the lies
it's hard to face the truth sometimes
god i feel so useless
god i hate myself
when i try to get over you
i hate myself
how will i ever get over you?
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
and after all this time you would think i'd understand the way i feel but no
i only think about myself
and it's driving you away
sometimes it hurts so much to lose the one you love

i'm drowning in nothing
nothing real
nothing left...nothing
i'm losing myself
sinking deeper down
silently
leaving this behind
nothing left but me
i'm hating myself...
hating
everyone hates me now
everything has changed
everyone has changed...
but me
everyone has changed

i keep breaking all the promises
i keep making to my self
you'd think by now i'd be over this
instead i'm feeling sorry for myself
so why does everything seem so desperate now
i should be feeling so alive
but it feels like something's missing
something's wrong somehow
it feels like something
deep inside has died
so why do i feel so desperate now
why do i feel like dying
why do i feel desperate now
why do i feel desperate now
i keep breaking all the promises
i keep making to my self
but the promises mean nothing to me anymore
circling the drain...
spiraling to hell...
so why do i feel so desperate now
why do i feel like dying
why do i feel desperate now
why do i feel desperate now

so this is where i say goodbye
this is where my story ends
and if there is one thing
i've learned from life
it's that it gets you in the end
so goodbye my friend
goodbye
so goodbye my friend
goodbye

i know the tears you're crying in your bed at night alone
i've cried those tears a thousand times
but those shallow empty songs about suicide are patronizing
you've got to learn to face your fears
or do you think i'll be less lonely when i'm dead
it can't silence all the voices in my head
i close my eyes but i can't make it go away...
do you think i'll be less lonely when i'm dead
i know the songs you're singing saying nothing loud and clear
i've heard that song a thousand times
but your noble empty lies about suicide are patronizing
you can never understand what i feel
or do you think i'll be less lonely when i'm dead
it can't silence all the voices in my head
i close my eyes but i can't make it go away...
or do you think i'll be less lonely
god i pray i'm less lonely when i'm dead
when i'm dead

lost in a world of doubt and insecurity
nothing that you hold sacred nothing that you believe
your life is a contradiction
while you thrive on manipulation
i fight to just hold onto what i believe
i won't become the thing i hate...
i won't become the thing i hate...
i won't become the thing i hate...
i won't become you
you've treated me like i'm a worthless piece of shit
you think like you're in control but you make me sick
i want to watch you suffer
the way you've made me suffer
i want to fuck up everything you've ever loved
but i won't become the thing i hate...
i won't become the thing i hate...
i won't become you

i hope i see you on your way down
i hope you break every bone
i hope it kills you on your way down
i hope you die alone
all of your hate and all of your lies
will it be worth it?
when all of your friends
refuse to be alibis
will it be worth it?
i'll see you on your way down
it's kinda sad to watch you break down
you greedy fuck you pissed it all away
so who will catch you on your way down
you've only got yourself to blame
when all of your worst fears materialize
will it be worth it?
there's nobody left who cares you're alive
was it worth it?
i'll see you on your way down.

i've been so alone for so long
forgotten by the world forgotten to my self
your effervescent eyes have awakened me
and brushed the dust away...
but i knew you'd never stay
so i memorized the color of your eyes
as i lost myself inside you
i memorized the way our legs entwined
as i drifted off beside you...
at night i cling to you i'm so afraid
afraid the day will come
and i'll wake up and find you gone
but you promise that you'd not abandon me
and kissed my fears away...
but i woke up to that day...
but i had memorized the way our eyes would meet
reflected in the bathroom mirror
and i memorized your naked silhouette
as you slowly brushed your hair...
i miss god i miss waking up beside you
i've been alone for so long...
i forgot how much it hurts to wake up so alone
but i'd memorized how warm your body felt
as you lay half asleep beside me
and i memorized the way the sunlight filled the room
and played upon your body
miss god i miss waking up beside you