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New Element of the Periodic Table> > ----------- Element : Woman

> > Symbol  : Wo
> > Discoverer : Adam Edenwarden
> > Atomic Weight : Accepted as 53.6 kg; isotopes 
       vary  from 40 - 200 kg
> > Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urbanareas

> > PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

> > 1.Surface usually covered with thin painted film
> > 2.Boils at room Temperature
> > 3.Freezes without any known reason
> > 4.Melts if given special treatment
> > 5.Bitter if incorrectly used
> > 6.Found in various states, ranging from metals to common ore
> > 7.Ductile

> > CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

> > 1.Have great affinity for gold, silver and a range
       of precious stones and  absorbs great quantities of expensive
       substances
> > 2.May explode spontaneously without prior warning
> >   and for no known reason
> > 3.Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly
> >   increases by saturation in alcohol
> > 4.Most powerful money reducing agent known to man

> > COMMON USES:

> > 1.Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
> > 2.Very effective cleaning agent

> > TESTS:

> > 1.Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy
> > 2.Turns green when placed beside a better specimen

> > POTENTIAL HAZARDS:

> > 1.Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
> > 2.Illegal to posses more than one, although several
         can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not
         come into direct contact with each other

> > !!!!! WARNING !!!!!

> > PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE
     SEVERE FINANCIAL, HEMORRHAGING  AND MENTAL DISTRESS.
    BE CAUTIOUS!

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