When I wandered to the cafeteria today in search of some delectable, meat-free treat for lunch today, the first thing I saw was the fruit counter. No I thought, I have grapes in my room; I will be fine. Next I wandered around, scanned past the pizza table (Pepperoni, Cheese and Ueber Excess Meat Parade were the options), and approached the soup counter. Gasp! Doth mine eyes deceive me? Vegetarian chili!

Swiftly, I picked out a cup. They were out of the 2-cup variety, but with this chili, one cup would suffice. I filled my cup. The second register opened before me, and I got through the line, acquired a lid, and fled to my room where I was anxiously engaged in preparing a good setting for the devouring of chili.

I removed the lid, and set the cup on my desk. I moved my mouse, then moved my keyboard so as to have a decent space to act as a table.

The chili made a satisfying plop when it landed on my leg. It then proceeded to bounce, chili-down on the carpet beneath my desk. I had nudged it just a bit too much with the keyboard. And the soup was hot, very hot, so I had to remove my jeans with haste. And there, under the desk, lay my lunch, seeping into the carpet. I was in shock.

Now the carpet lay drying after my clean-up efforts, and I have acquired a vegetable sandwich for lunch today. But my heart aches for the meal that will never be.