A young boy had just gotten his driving permit.He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car.His father said to him, "I'll make a deal with you.You bring your grades up, study your bible a little, and get your hair cut, then we talk about it."
A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car.His father said,"Son, I'm really proud of you.You have brought your grades up, you've studied your bible diligently, but you didn't get hair cut!"
The young man waited a moment and replied,"You know dad, I've been thinking about that.You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair."
His father replied,"Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went!"



AT a celebrity party, Stevie Wonder meets golf champ Tiger Woods and mention that he, too, is an excellent golfer. Tiger is a bit skeptical that the blind musician can play golf well, but he's too polite to say anything.
"When I tee off,"the singer explains,"I have a guy call to me from the green. My sharp sense of hearing lets me aim." Tiger is impressed, and Stevie suggests to play a round.When Tiger agrees, Stevie asks,"How about if we play for $100,000?" Tiger insists he won't play for money, but Steive argues until Tiger finally relents and says,"So, when do you want to play?"
Stevie replies,"I'll play on any night you choose."



OVERHEARD in the stable at Bethlehem:"I don't know, you wait a lifetime for a wise man and then three come all at once."



A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.
She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got news for you.You're going straight to hell!"
The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts,"Good heavens, I'm on the wrong bus!"



A government employee found an old brass lamp in a filing cabinet.When he dusted it off, a genie appeared and granted him three wishes."I'd love an ice-cold beer now,"he told the genie.Poof! A beer appeared.
Next the man said,"I wish to be on an island, surrounded by beautiful and willing women,"Poof! He was on an island with gorgeous women fawning all over him.
Oh, man, this is the life, the guy thought. I wish I never had to work again.And poof! He was back at his desk in his government office.