 |
 |
| A personal message... from Walt Oyster. |
| To one and all, welcome! I thank you for visiting our site, and hope you enjoy our park when you visit. We've worked hard to bring you every sight and sound that oysters provide and we know you will like every single one. This has been my dream for 45 years, when when I was still in the womb. Unfortunately, the government regulates parks like crazy, so my added dreams of cheap liquor and child prostitution have gone unfufilled. I've done everything I can to make your Oysterland experience special. R&D nixed the LSD spray misters, so you'll have to rely on the peyote Dwayne sells out of the back of his van. Also, spend some time in Seabeck. It may be quaint, but dammit, it needs the tourist dollars. Oysterland Inc. has been and will continue to be the foremost leader in oyster products and services. Quality is number one, and if it wasn't for those Communists in the unions, I would spend every dollar on the park (and cocaine...and turkey sandwiches). Maybe I'll see you around the park. If you do, say hello! Sometimes I like to sleep in the bushes behind the oyster tanks. Grown-ups can be funny sometimes. Would you help an old whino to his feet and send me on my way? Once again, thanks for vistiting and tell one and all about Oysterland. we'd really appreciate that. Remember, here at Oysterland Inc, WE THINK FOR YOU. Take care and god bless, Your crazy uncle, Walt Oyster |
| Return to Oysterland Inc. Last updated January 28th, 2005 |