Why did the chicken cross the road?
Mat: To be free of Aes Sedai.
Moiraine: ~studies chicken intently~ The wheel weaves as the wheel wills...
Elayne: I am the daughter heir and I say this chicken has every right to cross the road.
Lan: Because death is as light as a feather and duty as heavy as a mountain.
Min: ~looks above chicken~ This chicken is destined for greatness, deep fried greatness, that is.
Asmodean: I don't know, but my lot is tossed in with his now.
Gholam: He's fleeing from that foxhead medallion.
The Dark One: CHICKEN. YOU ARE SUMMONED TO SHAYOL GHUL AT ONCE
Berelain: Why are you looking at a chicken when you should be looking at me?
Sammael: T'sag! This is your army, Al'Thor?
Hopper: The chicken is here too strongly...I must eat it.
Things We Wish We'd Heard in WoT.
"Right, I've had enough of your whining, Faile. I think it's time I gave you a long overdue spanking..." Perrin.
"I'm sorry Rand, but you made me tell you. But blood, death, and maiming in your aura, don't necessarily mean bad things...." Min.
"Gosh, flip, poo, and darn it." Uno.
"Make sure you are very careful on this 'skimming' platform, my lord.... My lord? Rand? RAND?" Asmodean.
"So you�re Shadar Haran? Tall bugger, aren't you! Where's the big guy? I reckon he wants to see me, and thank me for all my good work." Moghedien
"Oh, Randy-poos! That French-maid's outfit I ordered arrived. *w* Wanna join the Shadow now, you naughty boy?" Lanfear.
"Of course I won't use my royalty to pull rank on you Rand. Now be a good boy, and go fetch your queen her slippers." Elayne.
"CHOSEN, MEET THE NEW NAE'BLIS.... BELA, MEET MY CHOSEN...." Dark One.
"Puuuuuppppy Poooowwwweeeer!!!!" A DarkHound.
"Rand, you idiot, I am kidding, don't really kill him, you fool boy!" Lews Therin.
"Rand, did you know that I am really Be'lal Reborn?" Mazrim Taim.
"Hey, cutie, wanna be my Warder?" Red Aes Sedai.
After Mat screams in the Old Tongue.) "What did he just say, Mother?" Egwene.
"I believe he was ordering a hamburger and fries. To go." Siuan.
Min: �Rand, dear, there is something I want to tell you... Aviendha will have quadruplets and Elayne is already pregnant with twins. Rand? Rand?! Wake Up, Rand!�
LTT: �You know what? I am sick of all this death and dying. I think I'll scream about flowers or something.�
Rand: Min, Elayne, Aviendha, will all three of you come into the bedroom for a minute?
Green Man: HO HO HO, GREEN GIANT!!!
Demandred: I was really disguised as Chester Cheetah.
Someone to Rand: Rand, use the Forc..err..Source!!!
Perrin to Berelain: Hey, if Rand can have three, I can at least have two...
Black Ajah: Parade around as the New and Improved Gray Ajah.
Anyone to an Ogier: I�ll tell you what to do with that sausage-like finger of yours...
Horn of Valere inscription: Blow me
Anyone to Verin: Look at me like a bird again, and your new nickname is going to be �Gooniebird.�
Anyone to the gholam: Hey stretch, I'm gonna shove your head up your a$$ and roll you down the street like a hool-a-hoop.
Anyone to Mat: Hey, don't feel bad. If I knew that the woman I was fated to marry was a 12 year old boy, I'd do more than put out an eye...
Anyone to Lanfear: O.K., how is it that you don't fall forward...?
D.O. to Sammael: I�ve brought you back to life, but only 3 1/2 feet tall, and your new name is Halfpint.
If I Should Become an Asha'man:
Learn that bondage... um bonding trick that they use on women for um...research purposes.
Learn all the healing tricks that I can, as well as any other non-combative stuff that I have a knack for. This way I can easily find gainful employment after Tarmon Gai�don.
