| AMUZING STORY (2) |
| This is a story all about a pinapple called George and his quest to find the ultimate treasure!!! To appreciate this story there's a couple of things you've gotta do! 1. Turn up your collar (if you have no collar, turn up someone elses) 2. Shout "I won the lottery and I'm gonna rent out Anne Robinson for a weekend" There was this pinapple. He was called George and he sat living his life in the fruit bowl with his friends Bob the banana, Ogden the Orange and Avery the apple. One very fine Tuesday morning he realised some thing. He had never done all the things he wanted to do. As a young Pinapple he dreampt of seeing trees dance to the sound of eggs being thrown at some molecules of air. He also wanted to see his friends freed from a life of crime and fruit bowl, to explore the true meaning of chat shows and to get a different hair style! He had decided. He was going to go in search of his dreams. Off he went. He packed his umbrella, fudler pingo, and waterproofs and left. He had been on the road for five days and as everyone knows if the cat fits wear it on your left knee cap. George was tired, he had been walking with no food or water, he was getting desperate so he did the unthinkable and went to B*rger Ki%g!! Next stop was the egg factory. This was where he made a discovery which was to change the way we look at chickens forever. He wandered inside. He had made an appointment at 11:45 but he got there at 11:25. He didn't think it would matter and planned to wander for a bit anyway. Here at the factory he assumed (like everyone does) that the machines made the eggs out of scrap metal, mdf and some harmfull solvents. But what he saw was to change him forever. I warn you now, if you can't handle the truth about eggs, read no more and go on a different website. However, if you CAN handle the truth, read on and be prepared to be scarred for life. George saw what he thought never possible, as he looked round he saw chickens, chickens? I ask you, never would it be thought. As he observed the process of 'making eggs' he realised that as the chickens pooh'd the pooh was taken and put in boxes and called eggs! That's the real truth!! All eggs are is chicken pooh!! This was one of the scariest things he had ever seen (apart from when he woke up to see Anne Robinson in his bath, and it was a nice bath. All gold trimmings with lovely white hinting at creme china. The fear that struck George was immense. So immense his hair fell out! He looked in a mirror and decided he quite liked it!! 2 missions completed!! After the press got hold of the news about the eggs/chicken pooh everyone wanted an interview. In the end George became obssesed with chat shows and started one of his own called 'Saturday night Pinapple'. As for his friends, well, they never did get saved. Bob the banana and Avery the apple were monched by evil humans and Ogden the Orange was left to go off. The moral of this story is clear: Whenever there's an orange in the fruit bowl, noone ever eats it but if you don't have any oranges the fat cat sat on the mat eating proffiteroles shouting "Barry, eat my bumper!" |
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