harem

The Harem Club for Men

1. Nothing in this world will cheer me up like flowers.

2. Little cute things make me like you more.

3.No means No, Damnit.

4. I have a life outside of you.

5. Do not comment on PMS. You try walking around with a phone book up your ass for a week.

6. There is such a thing as the g-spot, and no, find it your own damn self.

7. Ultimatly, my father will hate you.

8. Fear not my parents, fear my best friends.

9. Don't make me choose between you and my girls...it's a losing battle.

10. Stick with your convictions, and let me stick with mine.

11. Don't get me started on the abortion topic...it's my choice, not yours.

12. Mind your own damn business.

13. The appropriate response is: "Actually, I was just thinking how fabulous your butt looked in that dress!"

14. My body is my temple and you are just another Aetheist.

15. No matter how many times you piss us off, you still find a way to make us smile on our worst days...and we both love and hate that.

16. So, you like oral sex, huh? How original. You don't like giving it tho...yeah...ME NEITHER.

17. My name is not "Hey Woman."

18. I will hurt you if you hurt me.

19. When I say you're funny and laugh from my throat, I'm lying.

20. When I say you're handsome and laugh at all, I'm lying.

21. When I say you're the first, I'm lying.

22. When I compliment the little general while standing at attention, I'm REALLY lying.

23. Condom good, herpes bad.

24. Condom good, chlymidia bad.

25. Condom good, gonnorhea bad.

26. Condom good, baby yours.

27. Condom good. Clear enough for you?

28. Bow to the Queen.

29.I really don't have time for you to be clingy.

30. If you treat me badly and i am blind to what you are doing, my friends will kick your ass.

31. My mother does not let me date boys with fleas.

32. Feel free to look at other women, I won't mind. I look at other guys when you're not around, too. Just keep your hands to yourself.

33. You must learn to dance, or no woman will truly love you. I'm serious. It's true.

Submitted by H&S Enterprises to educate the confused male on the inner workings of the female mind. (Also to provide a response to the self-damning question; "Do I look fat in this?"

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