Mama: Deary, you're talking to the wrong people.
Roxie Hart: You're, THE Velma Kelly. I was there the night you got arrested!
Velma Kelly: Yeah? You and half of Chicago.
Velma Kelly: First she steals my publicity. Then she steals my lawyer, my trial date. And now she steals my goddamn garter!
Billy Flynn: This trial...the whole world...it's all...show business!
Velma Kelly: You wanted advice? Well here it is...straight from me to you...keep your paws off my underwear.
Mona: I loved Al Lipshitz more than I could say. He was a real artistic type, a painter. He was always trying to find himself. He'd go out every night looking for himself. And on the way, he found Ruth. Gladys. Rosemary. And Irving. I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive. And I saw him dead!
Roxie Hart: It'll never work...I HATE YOU!
Velma Kelly: There's only one business where that's no problem at all.
Roxie Hart: You want some advice, well here's a piece of advice from me to you, lay off the caramels.
Billy Flynn: I don't mean to toot my own horn, but if Jesus Christ lived in Chicago today, and he had come to me and he had five thousand dollars, let's just say things would have turned out differently.
Roxie Hart: They LOVE me!
Billy Flynn: They'd love you a lot more if you were hanged! You know why? Because it would sell more papers...That's Chicago!
Billy Flynn: Would you please tell the audience.. err.. the jury what happened?
Billy Flynn: He had strength and she had none.
Billy Flynn: [as Roxie] And yet we both reached for the gun.
Court officer: Do you promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?
Velma Kelly: And then some!
Velma Kelly: No I'm no one's wife, but oh, I love my life and all that jazz!
Roxie Hart: God that's beautiful!
Billy Flynn: Cut out God. Stay where you're better acquainted.
You can like the life you're living, you can live the life you like. You can even marry Harry, but mess around with Ike.
Roxie Hart:
Roxie Hart:If they string me up, well, I'll know who brought the twine!
Amos Hart: Hope I didn't take up too much of your time.
Mama: In this town, murder's a form of entertainment.
Roxie Hart: I love my audience. And they love me. And I love them for loving me. And they love me for loving them. And we love each other. And that's because we didn't get enough love in our childhoods.
Ms. Sunshine: Roxie, dear, what happened?
Roxie Hart: Oh, don't worry about me. I just hope it didn't hurt the baby.
Velma Kelly:Oh, shit.
Reporter: Would you like to give us a word or two?
Kitty Baxter: I'll give you three- GO TO HELL!
Roxie Hart: And then I started foolin' around...and then I started screwin' around, which is foolin' around without dinner.
Velma Kelly: She'd say, "What's your sister like?" and I'd say, "Men."
Mama: As you know I'm here to take care of you. Now if anything hurts you, or upsets you in anyway. Don't run your fat ass mouth off to me cause I don't give a shit! Now move out!!
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