Carla: Soft centers, hard centers. I like ALL the chocolates in the box.
Lila: So, you're working in a discount bookstore, huh?
Maggie: I am? Oh! "Ten Percent."
Tony: That's funny... Get out!
Kim: I am out.
Maggie: You're not bi-sexual, Carla -- you're omni-sexual! You're like that tornado in the Wizard of Oz, sweeping up everything in your path.
Mr. L.B. Marcus: The books have been classified as obscene and will not be allowed through the border. Now, if I can just get you to sign here.
Frances: Little Red Riding Hood is obscene?
Mr. Marcus: Well, we, we thought it was something else.
Safe sex advocate: I'm off Thursday on the "Love that latex" Safe sex tour. I'm giving safe sex demonstrations from Tuktoyaktuk to Yellowknife.
Carla: Customs held up another order of books at the border. They're claiming the books are pornographic... hello? Which they aren't. Well, maybe "Butches in Chains" is, but so what?
Judy: I'm Jeremy.
Lila: You're a man?
Judy: No, no, no, no, no, not really. Not ever. I was born into a man's body but I've always been a woman and well, after the final surgery...
Lila: I think I need a little drink.
Lila: I read a study and after the age of forty a woman's chances of having sex are diminished by eighty percent. SO, after fifty, God help you. And since I probably won't be having sex again, chocolate is the only pleasure left for me.
Carla: Ouch, it's the plight of the bisexual. Gay girls won't play with you.
asking about Maggie
Judy: You'd have to ask her that, Lila.
Lila: So, there is something going on?
Judy: Oh, well, she's nineteen. There's always something going on when you're nineteen.
Carla: Boys like toys too, you know.
Paul: This is for boys?
Carla: Um-hmmmmmm.
Paul: What is it?
Paul abruptly drops it
Frances: Seriously, Mr. Marcus, the Supreme Court has declared that anal sex is to gay male sex what Mozart is to classical music.
Mr. Marcus: Miss Turner, we are not here to discuss classical music. I myself am a huge Mozart fan, but...
Frances: Look, the fucking Supreme Court has declared this natural. It is not obscene.
Mr. Marcus: In case you haven't noticed this is not the Supreme Court. We're here in Customs and I have a job to do.
Frances: We're just following orders, are we? Asshole.
Mr. Marcus: From your perspective, that must be a compliment of monumental proportions.
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