The Chapter Called Five

The light finally dimmed and the five figures looked at their surroundings bewilderedly. A raven flew off the roof of the shrine and landed on Piccolo's turban. It was immediately whacked forty miles away, but not before it left a little present. (Kara's note: That was my idea! The whole raven-leaving-a-present-thing, I mean. Okay, onto the story now; just doing some shameless promotion, Cardiff: Yeah, shut up, it's my story, damnit!) Goku and Vegeta still lied in the middle of Piccolo's "birthday" cake. Kuririn had fallen over from laughing so hard. Now he got slowly to his feet. Gohan looked to his old sensei, who also happened to live with the guardian of Chikyuu, for an answer. Piccolo, understanding what Gohan thought, replied, "All I have to say is: Where in the heck are we, and how did we get here?"

"How should I know?!" Vegeta yelled. "You're so---what the hell are you bakas looking at?!" Everyone stared at him with a wide grin on their faces. Vegeta looked down and suddenly remembered that he was smeared in a mound of chocolate . . . with Kakarotto on top of him!(!!!)

The others felt his ki rise rapidly. Vegeta wiped his cheek with his hand. When he looked at it, it was unrecognizable, dripping brown, covered in chocolate. He placed the index finger of his hand into his mouth. Well, at least the stuff tasted good.

Wait a minute, he thought. Again he calculated his full situation. I'm drenched in chocolate cake. Kami knows what just happened and where I am now. Kakarotto is lying ON TOP OF ME . . . I am going to be sick. I am going to be sick. I am going to be sick! Where am I, damnit?! What's happening?! "This is all your fault, KAKAROTTO!"

It had not been a particularly good day for Vegeta, and he was going to take it out on Goku, the one "responsible" for his troubles. I've trained enough. This time I will defeat that baka Kakarotto! His ki shot up like a bottle rocket; his breathing became much heavier; his hair flashed once then turned gold; his vision went blank for a second while his irises changed to green; his muscles expanded and shredded the leather jacket he wore, revealing the pink shirt underneath which had the words "BAD MAN" emblazoned on it. "I'll get you for this!" he screamed at Goku. "You won't escape MY WRATH!" ("Hey, no quoting FUNimation!" someone yelled from off stage.)

Goku barely rolled off the cake in time to dodge a punch from Vegeta, now Super Saiyajin, of course. "Hey I didn't know you still had that shir--" he began. But Vegeta was on him in a flash, sending a volley of punches. Goku made a defensive block of his arms, but Vegeta began to break through fast.

"Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!" Gohan cheered. Piccolo and Kuririn stared at him. "What?" he replied innocently.

"What did I do!" Goku shouted to Vegeta while trying to keep his block up.

"You . . . were . . . born!" Vegeta yelled between punches. Finally he connected one with Goku's cheek and sent him flying into the temple wall.

"Hey, has anyone else noticed that we're right in front of a Buddhist shrine?" Kuririn asked.

"How do you know it's Buddhist?" Goku queried as he picked himself up out of the rubble of the wall.

"Gee, Goku, it could be because I've been a Buddhist monk for most of my life. You would think that I'd pick up on what a shrine looks like."

"Well then how did we get from Kami-sama's lookout to this temple . . . wherever it is?"

"Don't strain your pathetic mind trying to figure it out, Kakarotto," Vegeta said with a sneer. He charged up a ki blast on his palm.

Goku shrugged. "Okay."

Vegeta smeared his hand down his face. The ki blast withered. Why did Kakarotto have to be so hard to insult? Never, until he met this idiot, had he not been able to infuriate an enemy right at the start with a few well placed insults. Kakarotto was such an idiot that it often disturbed Vegeta to think they belonged to the same species. "Let me repeat mysel---"

"Beg your pardon, but who are you and what have you done to the Sailor Senshi?" asked a voice indubitably belonging to a man. (Hee hee, indubitably be a funny wordy. ^-^)

Goku turned around. "Who did we do to what?"

A small white cat jumped out of a bush near the temple. A crescent moon on its forehead sparkled in the light given off by Vegeta's Super Saiyajin hair.

"Who are you and what have you done to the Sailor Senshi?" it repeated, for it was he whom had spoke before.

"Who the hell are they?" Piccolo asked. Everyone stared at the cat quizzically except Vegeta, who was lost in thought. Now . . . Sailor Senshi . . . where have I heard that before? His subconscious kicked him hard. Baka! You watched that cartoon yesterday with Bra! And that cat is from the damned show, too. Then that means . . . where the hell am I?!

"Vegeta? Vegeta, hellooo?"

Vegeta suddenly snapped out of his trance.

"I KNOW WHO THE SAILOR SENSHI ARE!" he blurted without thinking. Shocked, he covered his mouth with his hands.

* * *

"Ah, Popo, I see you've collected all the dragon balls. That was quick," Dende said as a black figure approached him. Popo set the seven orange-colored balls down in front of the Namek.

"Are we going to make the wish now?" Usagi asked eagerly.

"Yes, but first we need to contact Goku-tachi and tell them what's happening."

* * *

A burning sensation crept across Vegeta's cheeks as he slightly blushed.

"Well, then who are they?" Goku asked.

Vegeta felt a large sweatdrop run down his head. "Oh . . . uh . . . I . . . don't remember? . . . Er," he quickly glanced left and right, looking for someone to pass the burden to, "ask your son!"

"Me?!" Gohan shrieked. He sheepishly looked down at his feet and tapped his fingers together. "I, um, that is to say, I . . . was, er, forced . . . yeah, that's right . . . to watch this anime, Sailor Moon, with . . . Pan once--or twice." He put his hand behind his head and sweatdropped. "I don't exactly know who the Sailor Senshi are entirely, but I'm sure . . . uh, Kuririn knows!"

"WHAT?"

"Oh, for the love cheesy poofs!" Piccolo cried. "What is so freaking hard about this?! All we've gathered now is there's some show called 'Say, Lormoon' or something and it has something to do with 'Sailor Senshi' and that cat wants to know where they are! If they're supposed to be from some anime then either that cat has gone off the deep end or I have---I mean we have, and I know it's me---not me . . . fine, I'll stop talking now!"

"Great, Artemis, now you've gone and confused them." Luna jumped out of the bush.

"Not another cat," Kuririn sighed.

"Well, Luna, I'm surprised they're even in this well of a mental condition. They don't seem the slightest bit shocked that I'm talking."

Goku suddenly interjected, "Whoa, guys, Dende-sama says some pretty weird stuff's going on."

"Huh? You've been talking to Dende-sama?" Gohan implied.

"Yeah, ever since Vegeta said something about the Sailor Senshi. Hey, everyone put their hand on my shoulder and listen in; Dende's gonna explain what's happening." Gohan, Kuririn, and Piccolo walked up and placed their hand on Goku. Vegeta turned his back and humphed, reverting back to his normal Saiyajin while doing so.

"Vegeta, c'mon!" Goku called.

"Why should I? All of this is so damn idiotic."

"You'll at least find out what's going on," Piccolo suggested. Vegeta considered this in his mind. It would be useful to know what was happening . . . and heck, what else was he going to do? Slowly, hesitantly, he walked over to Goku and slowly, hesitantly placed a hand on his shoulder. He made sure it was near a pressure point and squeezed his hand tight.

"All right, then," Goku said. "Dende-sama, are you still there?"

* * *

"Man this is nuts!" Kuririn exclaimed after Dende finished. ("I thought I told you not to quote. . . ")

"Dende-sama," Gohan said, "you mean we're going to become the Sailor Senshi?"

"That's what I just spent thirty minutes explaining, isn't it? And it didn't help that Goku kept repeating, 'I thought cameras took pictures, not send people to other universes' and Vegeta kept humphing and cussing me off!" Dende exclaimed in an exasperated tone.

"Gomen nasai, I really didn't understand," Goku apologized in his polite but clueless way.

"How long do we have to stay here?" Piccolo asked.

"Until we figure out a way to get you back. For now, you guys need to decide whether you want to do this or not. Though Miss Usagi's about to summon the dragon anyway, so you don't have much of a choice."

"Hold on a second, Dende-sama," Goku said. He turned to face Vegeta, Piccolo, Gohan, and Kuririn. "Okay guys we're going to decide the democratic way. ("I didn't know he understood the concept of democracy," Gohan whispered to Kuririn.) Everyone write down whether we do the right thing and take the place of the Sailor Senshi or not on these pieces of paper I conveniently found in my pocket." He handed out the paper to everyone (who were wondering since when was there a pocket in Goku's gi). They all scribbled down their vote. "All right Gohan, tally the votes."

Gohan flipped through the papers. "We have one 'yes, definitely', one 'eh, all right', one 'I guess it's the right thing to do . . .', one 'NO!', and one 'I hate you, Kakarotto! This is all your fault! Dam---' er, we'll take that as a neutral. He gave the papers to Goku. "Majority rules. . . . We have to take the Sailors' place."

Piccolo and Vegeta's eyes widened and jaws dropped wide enough to let Fat Buu walk through as shock overcame their faces.

Yes, Vegeta does have a pink shirt that says "BADMAN", although it's really from the Cell Saga, but I like it when he wears it, so he did because I am . . . SUPREME RULER OF THE UNIVERSE! MUWAHAHAHA!(Another one of Kara's notes) Actually, I am the SUPREME RULER OF THE UNIVERSE! TAKE THAT, CARDIFF!

Eh, no one sends me comments, questions, or suggestions anyway! So you might as well head on over to chapter 6 or you could go home. 1

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