Matteo: Hello and welcome back to class. I hope everyone remembered last weeks lesson on addresses. Just to show me that you bakas can retain knowledge for more than a second, greet me properly.

Cherry Blossom: Hiyeeeee Teo-chaaaaaaan!

Matteo: Congrats. You get the dunce cap for the day. Anyone else care to try?

Duo: Lemme give it a shot.

Cherry Blossom: Duo-kun! ::glomps him:: What are you doing here?

Duo: I wanna know how to speak Japanese so I can figure out what Heero’s saying to me. By the way, what does "baka" mean?

Cherry Blossom: O.o;;; Um…maybe you should ask Matteo-chan here.

Duo: Okay. So, Matteo-chan—

Matteo: That’s Matteo-sensei.

Duo: ::rolls eyes:: Whatever. What does "baka" mean?

Matteo: We’ll get into name calling later. For now…we’re going to learn GREETINGS!

Cherry Blossom: Yay.

Duo: Goody.

Matteo: Enthusiasm people! Wait a minute…Why does this sound familiar?

Cherry Blossom: ::shrugs:: Beats me.

Matteo: Oh well. Let’s just get on with the lesson. There are many different ways to say hello in the Japanese language, same as the English language.

Duo: ::proudly:: I speak American.

Matteo: Yes, well whatever. How are some ways you guys say hello?

Duo: ‘Sup?

Cherry Blossom: Good Morning.

Duo: Hi.

Cherry Blossom: Hello.

Duo: Hey.

Cherry Blossom and Duo: WAZZUUUUUUUUUP!!!

Matteo: -_- Can’t forget that one, can we.

Cherry Blossom: Nope. ^__^

Matteo: When saying hello to someone it is important to take into account the time of day, and status of the person you want to greet. Since it’s early in the morning and I am a fairly important person…

Cherry Blossom: ::gags::

Matteo: You would say,

Ohayo Sensei.

(Good Morning teacher)

Cherry Blossom and Duo: Ohayo Sensei.

Matteo: Good. Like a couple of robots. Let have some feeling in it!

Cherry Blossom and Duo: Ohayo Sensei!

Matteo: No, no, no. I want heart! Like a Disney greeting.

Cherry Blossom and Matteo: OHAYO SENSEI!! ^_________________^ (big Disney smiles)

Matteo: Yes. That was fine. ::slightly scared by the Disney smiles:: Now if you two were to greet each other, you would use another word, less formal. Repeat after me:

Konnichiwa tomodachi!

(Hello friend!)

Cherry Blossom and Duo: KONNICHIWA TOMODACHI!! ^_______________^

Matteo: ::shudders:: Okay you can stop with the Disney smiles. You’re scaring me. Now when it’s evening out you change your greeting to:

Konbanwa tomodachi.

(Good evening friend)

When you have finished meeting with your friend you must say goodbye. Most of you probably know this next word:

Sayonara

(Goodbye)

Duo: Yeah! Sayonara suckers!! Buahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Matteo: MOST of you ::pointed glare at Duo:: are pronouncing it wrong. All the syllables must carry exactly the same weight. Sa-yo-na-ra. NOT Sayo-naaaaa-ra. If you can’t get the hang of that, try putting the emphasis on the SECOND syllable. Sa-YO-na-ra.

Duo: Sa-YO-na-ra.

Cherry Blossom: Yay! You did it! ::runs amuck hyperly for a few minutes with Duo::

Matteo: -_- If you are talking to someone of great importance, probably the person who gives out the paychecks at the end of the week, you would use the more formal version of Sayonara:

Shitsurei shimasu

(Good bye)

This literally means, "I’m going to lose courtesy." Kind of like when we say "excuse me" before leaving the table.

Cherry Blossom: It’s similar to the phrase "O-jama shimasu" which means literally, "I will be a nuisance". You use this when you enter a guest’s home.

Matteo: o.O

Duo: o.O

Matteo: How did you know that?

Cherry Blossom: I read ahead.

Matteo: Well STOP IT! I’m the teacher around here!

Cherry Blossom: Sorry.

Matteo: When parting company from a group you can say:

Oyasumi nasai minna

(Good night everyone)

Or the less formal (used with relatives or close friends) phrase:

Ja ne

(see you/okay then)

Cherry Blossom: Ja neeeeeeee!

Matteo: No don’t leave yet! We’re not finished the lesson. When you are leaving a household, your parents might say to you:

Itte rasshai

(So long)

Cherry Blossom: My parents usually say "take the trash with you on your way out".

Matteo: You would reply with:

Itte mairimasu

(okay, so long)

When you do get back to the house, you would say—

Duo: Honeeeey, I’m hoooooome!

Matteo: NO. You would say:

Tadaima

(I’m back)

Then they would say—

Duo: What took you so long?

Matteo: No.

Okaeri nasai

(Welcome home)

Cherry Blossom: Obviously you don’t know my parents.

Matteo: Now if someone was leaving on a trip you might say something like:

O-daijini

(take care)

Cherry Blossom: Aww….Teo-chan. You’re so sweet! You take care of yourself too. ^__^

Matteo: Just…go away. All of you.

Duo: But I still don’t know what "baka" means.

Mateo: Next week!