deuinterview.page

DEADEYESUNDER interview (Part 1) by Oswald Knox - Conducted at New England Metal and Hardcore Fest, April 2002 - Worcester Palladium

Knox: Justin from deadeyesunder. How are we?
Justin: Very good.
Knox: Good. Uh, how, how is deadeyesunder?
Justin: Pretty good, we're back in action. We got a new drummer. Actually, we got a new lineup. We got a new drummer, new second guitar player, and a new singer. Well, the singer's not really new, he's been with us a couple of years.
Knox: Someone told me you need a new bassist.
Justin: No, no, I think the bassist we have is pretty good. He's a bit of a cretin but he's a good guy.
Knox: Very good. Uh... are midgets technically human?
Justin: Ofcourse, they're just little people.
Knox: What's uh... what's the date of David Hasselhoff's birthday?
Justin: David Hasselhoff? Isn't he only big in Germany? I watched him in Night Rider but that was about it.
Knox: Do you think that Germans are bad people?
Justin: Nein.
Knox: Answer the question. What's, what's David Hasselhoff's birthday?
Justin: I have no idea -
Knox: ANSWER THE QUESTION!
Justin: I think he's a cretin, okay?
Knox: July 17th. Uh... what does Passion Fruit Snapple taste like?
Justin: I don't drink Snapple.
Knox: Why? Are you some kind of goddam vegan?
Justin: Vegan? Are you kidding?
Knox: Are you some kinda goddam vegan?
Justin: No, I'm just a plain old vegetarian.
Knox: Are you some kinda goddam vegan?
Justin: No, vegans are bad.
Knox: There's no meat products in Snapple. Why do you boycott Snapple?
Justin: Ah, Snapple's bad. They're not good. They're too expensive.
Knox: Uh... well, actually, Passion Fruit Snapple tastes like "The Real Thing."
Justin: No way!
Knox: Uh... seriously, umm... how lame is Mel Gibson?
Justin: Mel Gibson? I don't know. He was kinda cool in Maximum Over - er, uh, not Maximum Overdrive, umm...
Knox: Gay.
Justin: No, no, no, no, no ... um... Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.
Knox: Gay.
Justin: Wasn't he in that movie?
Knox: Uh, did you like "The Patriot"?
Justin: What?
Knox: The movie, "The Patriot"?
Justin: I don't watch movies. The only movies I watch are "Falling Down" with Michael Douglas, "Carrie" with Sissy Spacek, and uh "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre."
Knox: Uh, you know, getting back to, uh, Mel Gibson, I think that dumb Aussie should, uh, go back and do some penal colony independance movies, instead of worrying about, uh, you know, uh, American independance and, and freedom for the goddam Scottish. What do you think?
Justin: Hey, what about some questions about some fucking metal?
Knox: What strings do you use on your bass?
Justin: I never change my strings.
Knox: Alright, getting back to the questions. Comic books: uh, respectable medium or contemptably childish waste of time?
Justin: Uh let's see, very gay.
Knox: Gay. Say it again.
Justin: Very gay.
Knox: Say it again.
Justin: Gay.
Knox: Uh, alright. Uh, Jean Paul Sartre, he claimed Kafka was an existentialist, uh, but many classify him in the absurdist category, uh, what do you think about that?
Justin: I think you should ask me questions about Bjork.
Knox: We, we'll get to that. Um, but what do you think? Uh, was Kafka an existentialist or more like a, a absurdist?
Justin: I really have no idea.
Knox: Franz Kafka.
Justin: Uh, wasn't he in the second world war?
Knox: Franz Kafka.
Justin: I don't know who he is.
Knox: Uh, in "The Metamorphosis," uh, do you think Kafka is expressing his, uh, self-isolating tendancies, you know, his intimacy ish uh id uh issues with his immediate family, or is he just writing a creepy story?
Justin: What do you think, I went to school or something?
Knox: You, you remember on MTV, that old, that old uh, commercial where, where the guy turns into a beetle in his room, you remember that?
Justin: Oh, Joe's Apartment?
Knox: Yeah, you, well, no, uh, no, the guy turns into a big fucking beetle and he's, and he's on his back, it's, it's old.
Justin: Oh, I like the Beatles.
Knox: Gay. Uh, who would win in a fight - Steven Hawking or Walt Disney's freeze dried, disembodied head?
Justin: Oh, I, I don't know, I don't promote violence, I don't like fighting.
Knox: Um, it's, uh... are you a fucking vegan?
Justin: No way.
Knox: Gay?
Justin: Nope! I, I like women. They're pretty and they smell good.
Knox: Do you have any, uh, do you have any last things to say about your band?
Justin: We're very metal. We have, uh, two new songs on mp3.com. Also go to the website, it's deadeyesunder.com.
Knox: Alright, uh, you've made it to the, uh, bonus round. Ok, here's, here, here's what's gonna happen. I'm gonna ask you five quick questions. You have 15 seconds to answer each. At the end, we'll tally your score. How does that sound?
Justin: Sounds good.
Knox: Alright, here we go, ready? The clock has started. Phyllis Diller or Chloris Leachman?
Justin: Bjork.
Knox: Phyllis Diller or Chloris Leachman?
Justin: Coris Leachman.
Knox: Ok, um.... uh... how, how many, how many chemicals are there in the periodic table?
Justin: Cannibal Corpse?
Knox: Periodic Table. Science, we're talking now. Chemistry.
Justin: Oh, the 5th Element.
Knox: Good enough. Uh, question number three. Finish this line: "I did it all for the_______"
Justin: Uh, what?
Knox: "I did it all for the _______"
Justin: What are you talking about?
Knox: Question number four -
Justin: Sorry, I don't like sucky ro - suck rock.
Knox: How, how, how, how many in a baker's dozen? How many in a baker's dozen
Justin: Six?
Knox: Uh, your favorite color?
Justin: Gray.
Knox: Ok, stop the clock. Alright, going back here. Phyllis Diller or Chloris Leachman... Uh, you, you, I, uh, forget what you said, but the answer is Ernest Borgine.
Justin: Ernest Hemingway?
Knox: Ernest Borgnine of TV's Airwolf.
Justin: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, Ernest Goes To Camp.
Knox: Uh, how many elements in the periodic table, you said Cannibal Corpse. Correct answer is "Who fucking cares, for the love of god, who fucking cares?"
Justin: Ok.
Knox: Qualify your answer, please.
Justin: I think you should ask me questions about Bjork. She's from Iceland.
Knox: Are you aware that I am the Bringer of Truth in this Age of Darkness?
Justin: Uh, I don't think so.
Knox: Uh, finish this line "I did it all for the," and you had pretty much no answer. Uh, if you had answered correctly, um... I would have said "You're a fag," but because you did not answer correctly, well, uh, uh, all the better to you. Uh...
Justin: Does that mean I'm a good guy?
Knox: Yes. Uh, number four. How many in a bakers dozen, you said 6. The answer is 13. Any good satanist should know that. 13. Your favorite color, you said gray. Uh, I'm sorry, no... the answer is violet with lavender polka dots. Violet.... with lavender polka dots.
Justin: I don't like that, though.
Knox: No, you do. Uh, alright, well, Justin from deadeyesunder, thank you for spending your time with us, and, uh.... gay.
Justin: Uh... no.