I was with a girl for three years. I wanted a break, she took it the wrong way [with the help of a few "good" friends] & thought I was being an asshole. Thought that I just wanted to be with other girls, yet, for the entire time I didn't do so much as touch another girl [and I still haven't]. I still loved her, but she took it the wrong way and within less than 2 weeks had moved on. This was only about 3 weeks ago. After only 4 days with him she had done stuff with him that her and I had done only after a year together, they covered almost the full first half of our relationship in less than four days[at least sexually]. I have never felt more broken, not ever in my life. I respected her; I waited to do all that "stuff." The one thing that was so special about or relationship is now gone. We were firsts at everything, absolutely everything, down to our first meaningful kiss. It was something so unique, something so special, something only the two of us shared. I could have done these things sooner with other girls but I didn't. Why? I LOVED HER AND I STILL DO! This girl I speak of, she is now walking around with a peice of my heart, she will always have it, and she doesn't even know. I will never get it back. Oh sure, over time it will heal, but not correctly, I will never be fully alive again. Don't ever fall in love, please, don't ever do it. If I can give one piece of advice, that's it. Love=Pain..
Well, If the recent rumors are true, the wonderful girl who once, "loved me" and who I will always love, is now having sex with her new boyfriend?oh wait, that's right they are just "seeing" each other. Well in any case, I have heard that her friend was speaking of her needing to go buy the "morning after" pill, gee I wonder why? God! Please don't let this be true. I love her. How could she have changed so much? She was so pure, so innocent; she was my "beautiful little angel." I waited [calmly and patiently] for at least 2 years and 6 months before making love to her. I really though it meant something. I never would have had sex with her had I not thought she was "the one for me", and she told me the same. I just feel so fucking shitty right now. The least she could do is keep her self-respect intact. I hope for her sake that she does not ruin her reputation. She was so innocent, truly angelic. God I miss her. I miss her so much.
Ok just for the record. It turns out those rumors I talked about in my last entry WERE in fact FALSE. This is good, lol. I don't want her to ruin her rep. Guess what? I'm finally starting to get over her, I still love her but, I'm actually interested in afew other girls. I think I'm gonna be ok. BIG PARTY ON FRIDAY! It's gonna Rock! Peace.
Yah so uh, the party got canceled. FUCK! Ok I'll try to stay calm?anyway, I'm really pissed off about that so yah, my weekend will probably suck. Well at least this way I'll get some studying done. One more exam left. Summer is gonna kick ass. Man I don't know if it's just "sour grapes" or what, but Robby seems to be gaining weight?her but is; well?it's bigger, that's all I'll say. And man she wore some crazy ass short shorts on Thursday, I can't believe how much she's changed?her whole attitude is just so different now?it's weird. Oh well. Time to let her go, and move on?Hey! That's a good song! GO Blink182! ?I'm out