I planned to give up caffeine on the thirtieth of July because not only was I finally down two Guys with only the third Guy left, but I was also school-less and not required to drive anywhere. Heck, I figured that with enough whining about my caffeine headache and Big Guy would quit calling all the time and get back to biker guy style vacationing. But, alas, it wasn't meant to be. I picked up a nasty post-nasal drip during my last week of class, which was in a blast freezer cleverly disguised as a biology lab, and it blossomed into a hacking cough. Coughing + headache is soooo not happening. So, I dutifully guzzled a reduced intake of Sam's Choice Cola, the Choice for Cheapskates. Then Friday, I just suddenly couldn't tolerate the idea of drinking cola anymore. I didn't want tea either. So, I'm welcoming day three of caffeine-freeness with bronchitis and tylenol. And orange juice. Yeah, I know, ascorbic acid reduces the efficacy of medication. Blah friggin' blah. At least I'm perky. Little Guy has been on the phone to his friends, re-enacting one of Hamlet's death scenes about the evilness of perky. Big Guy has been on the phone wanting to know when I got that prescription for Xanax filled and does it have sexual side effect.

On a side note, I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why pharmaceutical people cannot use articles. "You may experience headache, drowsiness, sexual side effect, colonostomy, blah blah." Is it just too difficult for the announcer folks to say "a" or "the" quietly and quickly at the end of their stupid commercials? Are they daring to be different? Do they think it sounds more "medical-ly" or something? And, I just would like to add, pharmaceutical commercials are a hypochondriac's wet dream.