I can't go on this way, or I'll go
mad.
I retired recently from my political
career to devote more time to my family, only to
find that my family was already falling apart.
Han's best friend and companion,
Chewie, was tragically killed while rescuing my
youngest son in fulfillment of his life debt. He truly HAD
given his life to fulfill what he saw as
a debt.
Now, Han is distant. He hasn't
been here since Chewie's death. He's crawled into a
bottle.
He doesn't even argue with me anymore...
And my children are being scattered
to the four winds. My eldest, Jaina, now flies
dangerous missions in the Republic's elite fighter squadron.
Her twin, Jacen, is on a
introspective journey, and is just as elusive as Han, except that
he's around, but not truly
"there".
And worst of all, my youngest.
Anakin. Named for his grandfather who was the
source of so much pain in the galaxy. He's so lost right
now. He blames himself for Chewie,
he feels that his father hates him.
His father only hates himself, but
poor 'kin can't accept that he wasn't at fault.
As I look out the viewport at the
passing stars, I can't help but wonder what will
become of my family. My children have all moved on with their
lives. Anakin is trying to be
strong and adult, his older siblings are similarly independent.
He was such an innocent, once.
I wonder: was the type of despair
now felt by my son what turned my father to the
Dark Side?
Hate is of the Dark Side.
So are fear and aggression.
My son and my husband. The
last pieces of my family that I can cling to are falling
away. My son is lost inside his quest for understanding,
and my husband refuses to cope
with the loss of our friend.
My brother is similarly faced.
He may soon lose his wife to a mysterious illness.
Except that they can cling to each other during this difficult
time.
I wrap my arms tightly around my
chest, and say a silent prayer for all of them.
Force help us.
- FIN -
Special thanks to [email protected] for beta-ing this work.