Dedicated to my cat Herbie who kept my lap warm during the hours I spent working at the computer.
FULFILLED
by Rachel Princess
The room was cool and clean, so refreshing after Tatooine's hot suns. Leia sat on the large bed and combed through her long tresses of honey-brown hair, still slightly damp from her shower. She glanced around at the small bureau, the table and chairs, the small kitchenette counter off to her right. The room took on a comfortable and familiar aura. Funny, she had never felt at ease in this room until now. Up until two months ago when she had left the Alliance to rescue Han, the room was always cramped, tense and threatening to her sanity as she waited in agony for any bits of news.
She now sat cross-legged on the feather comforter and allowed herself a moment to relax and ponder everything that had happened. Leia felt incredibly grateful to the Gods for this moment. Han was safe. She had fulfilled everything she had vowed to do.
They had gotten back from Tatooine late the night before – after 14 hours aboard the Falcon. Lando and Chewie had been the ones responsible for getting them home so quickly. Han was still recovering and spent most of the time asleep in his cabin. Not wanting to slow his recovery and bother him, Leia sat at the holochess table catching up on documents and missives. It was hard to focus – there were so many things she wanted to talk to Han about. She wanted to know how he felt. But she also felt extremely content and happy just knowing that he was on board, safe and in one piece.
Their reunion on Jabba's skiff had been sweet but brief. After helping Han bandage up Chewie's knee, Chewie had moved further back on the skiff to help Lando. Leia had laughed a little because she knew Chewie's ulterior motive was to give the two of them privacy – at least some semblance of privacy.
After realizing how little clothing she was wearing, they found a discarded cloak in a carrier aboard the skiff and Han helped wrap Leia inside it. Han struggled to find his bearings every time he moved and Leia could tell he was growing more and more frustrated with his lack of vision.
"Don't worry" she said. "When we get back to the Falcon, I have some drops that will help speed up the process."
"Can’t wait." He sat down with his back resting on the railing, taking Leia's hand, "I feel like such a burden not being able to help out."
"Oh, we've gotten used to that by now," Leia teased.
"Yeah" But Han didn't return her smile. Wondering what else she had gotten used to without him. Looking up, he could see a fuzzy outline of Leia, but still felt so separated from her and his friends. Han pulled her hand, "Come here".
Leia had joyfully let Han pull her to him, snuggling up in his embrace. They sat together in silence the rest of the trip back, both contemplating their own conclusions.
Now they were here – the rendezvous point with the Alliance. She had checked in on Han early this morning in the medical center. He was still asleep, but Two-Bee had said his eyesight should be completely restored and there would be no side effects. No side effects. Which meant he had the power to leave just as easily now as he could have on Hoth.
Leia pushed aside her comb and hugged her knees to her chest. Would he leave now?
He had told her at Bespin that with Jabba there was no way out. He had to go. But now the filthy, slimy slug was dead. What had Han felt after their first night? Leia wracked her brain, knowing the basis of the whole mater – he had never returned her declaration of love. Over the past six months, Leia had come to grips with her vow – that even if Han didn't love her, she would rescue him regardless. That resolution had sustained her through the mission. Now it wasn't helping. Does he love me? Suddenly the answer to this question was the most important thing to Leia.
The knock at the door brought Leia quickly to her feet. Smoothing down the soft cotton robe around her waist, she realized she probably didn't look appropriate for any company. "Who is it?"
"It's me." Han's deep voice penetrated through the door. "Can I come in?"
Leia laughed, "I don't know, can you? Judging by the past few days I wouldn't know."
"Oh yeah? If you don't open this door you may soon find yourself without one, Your Worship."
Why you backstabbing, ungrateful…Opening the door, Leia's anger vanished. Here was Han as she remembered him; black pants with his blaster carrier, white long sleeved shirt and his black vest. They could have easily been back at Echo Base again were it not for the unfamiliar creased lines that now appeared under Han's eyes. They betrayed a determined and serious edge that only Leia and a few others would know was not there before the carbon freeze. Why didn't I notice that earlier?
"Hey."
"Hey Princess." Han's eyes widened at the sight of her, drinking up the vision he now could see in front of him. It seemed like several years since he had seen her. As Leia preceded him into her room, Han followed her movements, unable to stop looking at her petite form. She looked damned sexy in that thin cotton robe with her hair loose around her shoulders. And he could now see gold pieces intertwined throughout her curls. Must have been the Tatooine suns. Han sighed.
Leia couldn't help voicing her concern, "Are you okay? What are you doing here? When did you get out of the med center?"
"Relax. General Madine wanted to talk with all pilots this morning before the big meeting later. I got out of the med center just in time."
"Meeting? What did they want to talk about?"
Han waved his hand in the air, "Nothing. Just standard procedure."
Since when does he follow procedure? He's hiding something. Leia thought. She decided to deal with it later. For the moment, she was thrilled to see him. "Have you seen Chewie or Lando yet?"
Han rested his hands on the back of a chair, looking at Leia. "No, I came straight here."
A thrill passed through Leia and she couldn't hide her smile, "Oh."
Silence. Is he waiting to tell me something? Leia thought. That he's leaving? Anxious to fill the void Leia quickly spoke, "We should probably go see Chewie. You know he's been climbing the walls waiting to see you."
Han crossed the room, wanting to end the distance that separated them. Taking Leia's hands he glanced down at her fingers, running his hands over her smooth ones. "Leia, you have been more honest with me than I deserve. What you said at Bespin and again at Jabba's palace…it helped carry me through whatever time I spent in there."
Leia bit her lip nervously. Was he breaking bad news to her gently?
Looking up, Han met Leia's eyes intently, "Leia, I love you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. I love you so much. More than my own life."
Leia's pained look turned to absolute joy. "Oh Han" she whispered as she threw her arms around Han's broad shoulders and kissed his neck.
Han hugged her tight. He felt like he could never hold her long enough, or close enough to him. Putting his hand to her neck, he angled her head towards his and kissed her with all the pent-up emotion he had held since Cloud City. He thought he had lost her forever.
Leia sighed into Han's mouth, and kissed him back passionately. Her mouth was soft and inviting against his and Han was content for a few moments to simply savor her kisses. I love this woman! Han groaned as Leia's tongue slide into his mouth and met his own. He pulled her tighter against him. Her arms clung desperately to his shoulders and she skimmed her fingers up into his hair.
Trailing kisses down her throat, Han let escape the thoughts he hadn't dared speak of before, "I'm never leaving you Leia." Laughing at himself, Han kissed the sensitive grove of Leia's neck, "Even if you don't want me around, you couldn't get rid of me."
Leia smiled as she cradled Han's head in her hands and kissed the spot behind his ear, "You foolish scoundrel. Don't you know that would never happen?"
Han shifted to place kisses along her jaw, moving up towards her ear, loving the sound of her gasps and quick breaths. His hands moved to the tie around her robe. "My Princess" he murmured.
Leia's eyes were cloudy, full of passion as she pushed at Han's vest. Not needing any more encouragement, Han picked up the princess and laid her back on the bed. The cool sheets against her back and Han's warmth around her only further enticed Leia. They clung to each other for what seemed like hours, familiarizing themselves once more with what both had dreamed of during their separation.
When Han finally entered her, Leia cried out and soared to the bliss she knew could only come from being with him. "Oh, my love" she breathed as tears ran down her cheeks.
"Sweetheart…. what you do to me." His deep voice shook with emotion. Her soft cries of pleasure and the effects her body were having on his nearly drove Han over the edge.
Later, they slept tangled together with the heavy comforter covering them both. Han's body curled protectively around the Princess. Leia couldn't sleep long, still relishing the feeling of having Han with her at last – in the bed where she had wept and prayed for his return. She couldn't get enough of him. And he loved her! She closed her eyes, savoring his words. Running her fingers through his hair, down his rough jaw and placing kisses on his chest.
Han stirred slightly, keeping his eyes closed and smiled, "You keep doing that Princess and we'll be to round two very quickly."
"Round two? How many rounds are there?"
"Millions" Han grabbed a fistful of her soft hair and brought it to his face, inhaling the scent.
"Well" Leia came up on her elbow and ran her fingers over his chest, "we better get going then."
Keeping his eyes closed, Han breathed out a long sigh, "Give me a few more minutes. You wore me out, Princess."
Instantly alert, Leia raised an eyebrow, "Han, are you okay? Did we do this too soon?"
"Leia, no, no. Don't worry." Pulling the princess closer he added, "And you know that wouldn't have stopped me either."
Relaxing a bit, Leia sunk back down into Han's embrace and rested her head against the solid wall of his chest, loving the feel and sound of his breath rising and falling. She blushed suddenly at the recollection of how forward she had been with their lovemaking just now. Did Han think she was some kind of eager wench? Oh Gods! How do I figure this one out?
"Han?" Leia asked tentatively.
"Mmmm?"
"I'm sorry if I seemed a bit…. well…over zealous back there. It's just that I haven't seen you in so long…and maybe I got…a bit out of control."
Han opened one eye and frowned at Leia, "What?"
"All I'm saying is I hope I didn't come across…in the wrong way."
Han was instantly up, pushing Leia back on to the bed, capturing her wrists with one hand above her head and leaning over her. "Leia", his eyes calm but serious bore into hers, "I have loved you for several years, maybe even as early as Yavin. But I fell in love with you – amongst other things - for your passion and intensity and I always hoped – even dreamed – it would come out like this."
Leia swallowed and remained quiet, returning Han's gaze.
He continued, with a little more gentleness, "Don't get me wrong. I loved our first time at Bespin. It's kind of how I imagined it would be." Han grew silent and loosened his hold on Leia. "Of course we could have done without the rest…."
Leia brought her hand up to caress Han's face, leaning up to place kisses along his jaw. "I know Han, I know." She felt so loved by Han's reassurance, all the reserve and walls melted inside her. And she couldn't bear to see him go through any more pain.
Quickly recovering from his momentarily depressing thoughts, Han looked back at his princess. "So when is that important meeting?"
Leia glanced at the clock, "In two hours"
"Good" Han grabbed the princess and rolled with her on the bed until he was once again on top, kissing her deeply. "We can get through at least a few more rounds before then" he smiled wickedly.
"A few?!" Leia gasped.
Han nibbled on her ear lobe, "Yeah…you're right. Maybe a dozen then."
Leia laughed and clutched Han to her, returning the passion she felt from him in her kiss. She vowed deep in her heart to never let him go again.
THE END. (for now)